Mourning Light
by sss979
Summary: Something is very wrong with Michaelangelo. Can a new friend break the bonds of depression?
1. Chapter One

**MOURNING LIGHT **

NOTE   
I decided to repost this (in the same way that I posted Father's Sons: with links to "mature" scenes) because it had a very short life on ff.net (was done away with when they got rid of the NC stuff) and if you want to read the SEQUEL to this, reading the original makes it better. So those of you who've read, it hasn't changed any. Those of you who haven't, hope you enjoy! ;) 

(Kinda long, but please read it. It's important.)   
I'm perfectly aware that I'm going to step on some toes with this portrayal of Michaelangelo. And I feel I owe you readers a bit of an explanation. So allow me to explain.   
I studied the first movie to get the history for this character. And upon doing so, I realized that I didn't have a whole lot to work with. I could not believe how insignificant and insecure Mike was in that movie. Really he seemed to have no purpose other than it was his weapon that got caught on the ladder at the end. There was no development of his character, and by the end of the movie, I was seriously considering if he could even hold his own in a fight if his brothers weren't there. A weak character (like Donny) is fine... I can work with that. But Michaelangelo seriously gave me the impression that he was an 8 year old. The biggest problem was probably that his only display of sexuality is a crush on April that's likened to a child who's in love with their elementary school teacher.   
I don't like to rely on widely accepted "facts" about the characters if they can't be backed up by the original (ie-Mike is sensitive, smarter than he acts, etc.). I believe that somewhere along the line, the fans themselves evolved Michaelangelo into that sensitive character we now accept him as. But there's never been a piece (at least that I've found) that EXPLAINED that evolution. How did it happen? What changed him from a child into a child-like, fun-loving adult? This is the story of that evolution.   
So as far as Michaelangelo's personality goes, this piece takes place about two years after where the FIRST movie left off. (I didn't even WATCH the second one to prepare for this piece, so there's no reference to it). Yes, I know this idea is extreme. But just trust me. Because if you know me, you know I DO understand these guys and I don't take them out of character just for the hell of it. So flame if you must, but be on the lookout for a thesis paper on "The Psychology of Michaelangelo" in your e-mail inbox. (No joke, I DID profile him that intensely.)   
All other characters, and the background events of this story are based on the cartoon series. It wasn't SUPPOSED to be that way... it's just that I happened to get ahold of a bunch of the episodes and have since DROWNED myself in them. LOL One thing though. It's very hard for me to swallow the widely accepted fact that the turtles were 15 in those cartoons. I consider them more along the lines of 12 or 13. This is important because in this story, they're 17. But the mentality is SIGNIFICANTLY older than their characters in the cartoons. In other words, I aged them by about 5 years. Along the same lines, please note that Splinter, as in the cartoons, formerly WAS Hamato Yoshi, not his pet.   
Have I confused you yet? LOL   
Lotsa Japanese in here. No you don't all need to run and get your dictionaries. LOL "{This means it's in Japanese.}" and "This means it's in English." Okay? Enjoy. 

CHAPTER 1 

Crawling in my skin   
These wounds they will not heal   
Fear is how I fall   
Confusing what is real 

There's something inside me that pulls beneath the surface   
Consuming, confusing   
This lack of self control I fear is never ending   
Controlling, I can't seem 

To find myself again   
My walls are closing in   
(Without a sense of confidence and I'm convinced   
That it's just too much pressure to take)   
I've felt this way before   
So insecure 

Crawling in my skin   
These wounds they will not heal   
Fear is how I fall   
Confusing what is real 

Discomfort, endlessly has pulled itself upon me   
Distracting, reacting   
Against my will I stand beside my own reflection   
It's haunting how I can't seem... 

To find myself again   
My walls are closing in   
(Without a sense of confidence and I'm convinced   
That it's just too much pressure to take)   
I've felt this way before   
So insecure 

Crawling in my skin   
These wounds they will not heal   
Fear is how I fall   
Confusing what is real 

-Linkin Park   
"Crawling" 

**MICHAELANGELO: **

"Mike, get your lazy ass up out of bed and get in here and eat something." 

I grabbed my headphones, glancing over to make sure the door was locked before I pressed play on the portable CD player. The sounds of Metallica drowned him out. But I could still hear the pounding on the door. "Michaelangelo!" 

I stared up at the ceiling, my mind wandering over nothing in particular. The room was dark and quiet. I hadn't bothered to light a candle and the lightbulb was burned out. Hadn't felt like changing it yet. "Mike, I'm gonna break this damn door down if you don't answer me." 

Frustrated, I sat bolt upright, yanking the headphones off my ears. "What the _hell _do you want, Raph?" 

"Get out here and eat or I'm gonna force-feed you," he threatened. 

I glared at the door. "I'm not hungry." 

"Yeah, I know. Get out here." 

Anger and indignation welled up inside of me. But if Raph was at my door, that meant Leonardo wasn't here. And I knew without Leo to hold him back, he _would _make good on that force-feeding threat. I clenched my teeth. _God_, I hated him sometimes. I stood up and threw the door open, slamming it against the wall. "You have no right to..." 

"Move it," he pointed. "Now." 

I glared at him, defiant. "No." 

"That wasn't a request," he informed me. "Get moving or I'll kick your ass and _then _you'll go." 

I studied his expression. He wasn't mad. He was just being Raph. But I was furious. I hated that he could treat me like this. "Well, I guess you're just gonna have to kick my ass then, Raph, because I..." 

I saw a shadow move out of the corner of my eye and stopped. I looked away. "What is the problem?" 

"No problem, _sensei_," Raphael answered. "Mike was just getting ready to go eat something. _Right_?" 

It was more a threat than a question. He had a death grip on my shoulder. I cringed. "Michaelangelo?" Splinter questioned calmly. 

"Yeah," I relented. I didn't have the strength or will to fight with Master Splinter. "I'm going." 

**RAPHAEL: **

He didn't really eat. No more than he usually did, anyway. We had to fight with him every time we wanted him to eat a meal. And I could only watch over him for so long before he'd get up and throw the rest of his food away. At that point, I knew there was nothing I could do. But it worried me. In the past three months, he'd probably dropped fifty pounds. He was like a walking skeleton. 

"Mike?" I asked, sitting backwards in the chair across from him. "Is there anything I can...?" 

"Where's Leo and Don?" he interrupted, staring down at the bowl of cereal in front of him. He was playing in it, but I don't think the spoon had been in his mouth for the past five minutes. 

"Don's in the training room. I think Leo's topside, but I'm not sure." 

He nodded slowly. It was obvious that he wasn't interested in the answer. He'd just wanted to shut me up before I finished that sentence. I sighed and looked away. Leo walked into the room, back from wherever he'd been. A look of surprise flickered across his face. "Hey, Mike. How are you?" 

Michaelangelo shrugged, said nothing, and stared intently at the bowl in front of him. Leo turned his attention to me. "Did you catch the news this morning?" he asked. 

I grinned. "Since when am I out of bed at six in the morning?" 

He shrugged. "I was just wondering." He walked over to the cabinet and filled a glass with water. "There was a string of robberies last night and I was wondering if they were saying anything more about it this morning." 

Michaelangelo stood up. I considered fighting with him, but decided against it. I let him leave. Leo glanced at him as he retreated back to his room. Then he downed the rest of the water and set the empty glass on the counter. "Donatello's in the training room?" he guessed. 

"Yeah." 

He walked past me, hitting my shoulder as he left the room. I turned my eyes to the half-empty bowl still on the table and sighed. 

**SPLINTER: **

I breathed deep, taking in everything around me. Exhaling slowly, I allowed it all to melt into blackness. I could feel something was wrong. The silence was uneasy. I felt myself drawn away, and allowed it. It had been years since I had felt such a strong beckoning. Someone was seeking... no, not me... But it might have been me, in another life. 

I felt the slow, steady breaths carry me away and surrendered to nothingness. "Yoshi..." 

The name startled me. It was as clear as if it had been spoken to me audibly. But it was not audible. It came from a shadow. A shadow swirled in darkness. "{Who is there?}" I spoke in Japanese, well aware of the implication the name carried. 

"{It is...}" 

His voice faded. I could not hear him. Calmly, I focused my energies on the dark voice. "{State your name,}" I ordered calmly. "{Why do you seek me?}" 

"{You may not remember me. I am Tang Shiro. I seek your help.}" 

My mind flashed back to years in Japan, to summers spent in another life, another incarnation. I knew the name, but I could not envision the face. "{Are you he whom I seek?}" he continued. 

"{I am Hamato Yoshi,}" I confirmed. The words sounded strange to me, as if it were a lie. But it was not a lie. That was, in fact, my given name. 

"{I fear I am being foolish for trying to contact you in this way,}" he informed. "{But I have searched for you, and I have been unable to find you through any other method.}" 

"{Why do you seek me?}" 

There was a pause. "{Do you know who I am?}" he questioned. "{Do you remember?}" 

"{I recall your name,}" I replied. Tang Shiro had been my student when I was _shido shin _of the foot clan. That, of course, was before Shredder had destroyed the clan, and forever disgraced my name. As I considered the memories, my mind formed a picture, and I visualized the man. He had been one of my late students, and had only learned with me for two years. But in that time, he had proven himself very capable and ambitious. I knew of several attempts he had made at contacting me, after I had fled to the states. But I never responded, for fear of the repercussions his involvement with me could have. 

"{You still have not answered me,}" I reminded him. "{What do you require that only I can provide?}" 

He hesitated for a moment longer. "{You are the only man I know who lives still in the states. And I have a request to make of you.}" 

"{What is that?}" 

"{My life is in danger. And I fear for the lives of my children. I have mistakes in my business dealings, but my children should not have to pay for my errors.}" 

I said nothing, considering his words. 

"{My daughter has just turned seventeen,}" he continued after a brief pause. "{My son is twenty years of age. I fear for their lives, friend.}" 

I again said nothing, considering his request. "{I do not wish to burden you,}" he apologized. "{I only hope that you could help them to establish themselves in the states. They will work hard. You need not support them.}" 

I was silent for a moment longer, unsure of my reply. I was uncertain of how the turtles would react to this. I was sure of one thing, though. Raphael would not be happy. "{Tell me, Tang-san. Is this a final request? Or will they one day be able to return home?}" 

"{If they return, it will be of their own accord,}" he whispered. I could feel the rush of sadness wash over me. 

I breathed deep, considering many thoughts at once. Finally, I nodded. "{Send them, Tang-san. I will care for them.}" 

**RAPHAEL: **

"Master Splinter, no disrespect intended, but are you _insane_?" 

"Sit down, Raph," Leo warned. "There's no need to be rash about this." 

I glared at him and turned back to Splinter. "_Sensei_, they're expecting an apartment and jobs and all the other things that come with being an American in New York," I continued, somewhat bitterly. "How do you think they're gonna react to the truth?" 

"If their lives are in danger, Raphael, it's better than the alternative," Donatello informed. 

"Is it?" I challenged. 

"This is not a matter of debate," Splinter informed. "They will arrive in a matter of hours and you will treat them with courtesy and respect." 

"_Hai, sensei_," Leonardo agreed. 

I could've hit him. I _really _wanted to. Just to shut him up for _five _minutes! I grit my teeth and considered my options. I didn't want to fight with Master Splinter. For one thing, I knew I wouldn't win. But this was a bad idea. Why couldn't he see that? "I'm telling you Splinter, this is gonna cause problems," I informed, looking away. The gesture was relenting, the words were not. 

"Problems between who, Raphael?" he questioned calmly, although I'm sure he knew what kinds of problems I was referring to. These teenagers didn't know what they were getting themselves into, and I was sure they wouldn't like it when they figured out. And there was no way I was going to cater to the wants and needs of two spoiled children who wanted to sit around and whine about their problems. I had enough of my own to deal with. If it came to that, there were going to be _major _issues. 

"You don't even _know _these kids. And I'm not babysitting..." 

"If I'm understanding this correctly," Don interrupted, "these 'kids' are older than us." 

"Does that really have _anything _to do with it?" I challenged. 

"Well, the term 'babysitting' implies..." 

"I'm not going to be looking out for them," I corrected, glaring at him. "That better for ya?" 

"What are their names?" Leonardo asked. This discussion was no longer an issue for him. _Sensei's _words were golden in his eyes. "And where are we meeting them?" 

"They are named Rei and Yukio," Splinter informed. "You will meet them inside of Vinny's Pizza Place, at midnight." 

Michaelangelo flinched, but kept his eyes down. I was well aware of the implication, and the face that he hadn't said a word through all of this. "They know to use the back door?" Donatello asked. 

"_Hai_." 

I considered that for a moment. We had used Vinny's as a meeting place several times. Usually with people who didn't know what to expect. We were welcome there, even without disguises. That was a result of one particularly observant chef who happened to notice that we really weren't human underneath the costumes. Amazing what one could see if they actually _cared_. News of our frequent visits did good for their business, since we were sort of an urban legend anyhow. Of course, being who and what we were, we usually only visited after hours, and always through the back door. Sure, rumors of our existence were all over the news. And we sometimes had no choice but to make public appearances. But we _were _ninjas. And we _were _mutants. That was reason enough to stay out of sight if at all possible. 

I sighed. "Let me just say one more time," I mumbled, rubbing my forehead. I had a headache. "I don't think this is a good idea." 

**SPLINTER: **

I could feel the alert presence, though it was only four o'clock in the morning. I rose slowly and walked to the door, my mind ahead of my body in identifying the spirit. The living room was empty, as I had expected. No sound came from any room. I paused, and considered my intuition. Then I headed toward the _dojo_. 

I watched silently as Michaelangelo ran his fingers lightly over the long blade of a _katana_. A haze of uncertainty rested on him, as if it were a dense fog. He hung his head for a moment, and took in a deep breath. A quiet sob escaped his lips. 

"Michaelangelo?" 

He spun, startled, and knocked over the weapon rack. It hit the floor with a loud clang, an alarm in the middle of the silent night. He gasped as his eyes darted between it and me. "{Are you alright, my student?}" 

In the dim light from a candle on the floor, he looked to be shaking. "_Hai, sensei_," he bowed, the nervousness clearly evident in his voice. "{Did I wake you?}" 

His eyes remained downcast even as he straightened again. "_Iie_," I assured him. "{I was already awake.}" 

"{Is something bothering you?}" 

"{No. But perhaps I ought to ask the same of you.}" I spoke slowly and gently, not wanting to raise his defenses. "{You have been mourning for many months now, my son.}" 

He shifted nervously. "{I'm sorry.}" 

I sighed deeply. "{I do not seek an apology, Michaelangelo. I seek your recovery. But I cannot help you if you will make no effort to help yourself.}" 

A hardened look crossed his face. "{I know, Master.}" 

I sighed again. "{You know, yes. But I fear you do not understand.}" 

There was a long silence. "{May I leave?}" he finally asked. It strongly resembled a plea. 

I nodded. "_Hai_, Michaelangelo. _Oyasumi_." 

He bowed slightly and left the room, passing me. I hung my own head, and stared down at the faded blue mat. 


	2. Chapter Two

****

CHAPTER 2

Hmm… you know, I KNEW I forgot something! LOL I would like to give thanks, honor, and praise to Carrie, who helped make this book possible. She's helped me brainstorm and edit this book, and without her help, I probably would've ditched the entire concept. So thanks to Carrie; go read her stuff if you haven't already. ;) Trust me… it's good.

REI:

The taxicab driver spoke only in English and Yukio didn't understand him. I guess it was a good thing that I had studied English throughout school, and kept up with it through the movies and television shows I saw. Yukio had never seen the point in learning it. But then, we had never intended to wind up in America.

"Hey, you kids sure you wan' off here?" the driver asked. "This ain't the best neighborhood 'round."

"Yes, we're sure," I answered.

Yukio hit my arm and I turned to him. "{What does he say?}" he demanded.

"{He says this is a bad neighborhood. He asks if we're sure we want to be dropped off here.}"

"{Tell him we are certain.}"

I smiled. "{I don't need you to tell me _everything_, Yukio.}"

The pizza place was exactly where my father had said it would be. I paid the driver as Yukio exited the car and held the door for me. I stepped out onto the sidewalk, and took Yukio's hand to help steady myself on the high heels I was wearing. "{I do not understand why you insist on dressing that way.}"

I glared at him. Did we have to do this _now_? We'd fought about this the entire way here. "{We are not in Japan anymore,}" I reminded him. "{My attire is perfectly normal for this culture.}"

"{Your attire is bordering the point of indecent,}" he informed.

In his opinion, yes. In Father's opinion, too. He never did like the sound of the word "miniskirt".

"{You will change into something more modest at your first opportunity,}" Yukio commanded.

I looked away. "Sure," I mumbled in English. "After you peel this off of my cold, dead body." 

Yukio knocked lightly on the back door, but there was no answer. I pushed it open. "Hello?"

"In here," came the reply. It was followed by a brief laugh.

"They're from Japan, stupid. Why the hell would they speak English?"

"{We're here, come in.}"

Three different voices. I tensed. We were supposed to be meeting Hamato Yoshi. Perhaps he'd sent his sons. Father had advised that Yoshi had four teenage boys living in his house. The warning had been to Yukio, for my sake. After all, I was totally incapable of taking care of myself. I sighed and diverted my thoughts away from that frustration. Yukio stepped inside the building, pulling me behind him. 

Three shadowed figures sat in the dining area of the restaurant. A candle flickered on the table. I wondered why they did not turn on the lights. For that matter, I wondered why we had been ordered to meet them here in the first place. Why hadn't they met us at the airport? Or had us go to their house?

"Doyou speak English?" one of them asked.

"I do," I replied. "But my brother does not."

"{Before you come closer, there's something you should know,}" one of the figures told us, adopting our language. Yukio and I both froze. "{There was a little... misunderstanding between our fathers.}"

"Misunderstanding my ass," one of them growled.

A crumpled up napkin flew across the table and hit the speaker. "Knock it off, Raph."

"{We're not... exactly what you think we are,}" the first continued. "{And we don't want you to panic. There's a logical explanation for it but... you'll have to give us a minute to explain.}"

I hardly heard him. I knew I should be listening, but the mini food fight was much more interesting at the moment. "Raph" ended it with a glass of ice water, and the other figure sprang out of the booth, arms raised. "Aah!"

The figure who'd been speaking turned and surveyed the scene. "Will you two just _pretend_ like you're civilized?" he sighed. "Just for a few minutes?"

I hid a smile behind my hand and giggled slightly. Raph chuckled. "Hey, he started it," he defended.

"You realize I could hit you from all the way over here?" the standing figure questioned, pulling a _bo _staff off his back. I noted, as he moved, that his body was shaped strangely.

"Just try it."

"My weapon's a lot longer than yours, you know."

Raph burst out laughing, lowering his head to the table. "In what way?" he managed. I caught the innuendo and smiled.

"_Enough!_" the mediator cried.

I glanced at Yukio. He was clueless, as usual. The figure at the table sighed. "{I apologize for my _brothers_.}" He turned to glare at them with the final word, then looked back toward us. "{They often forget how old they are.}"

"Hey, I _warned _you," Raph reminded, though I wasn't sure what he meant. He was ignored.

"{My name is Leonardo,}" the speaker introduced. "{The man your father knew as Hamato Yoshi, we know as Splinter. He is our _sensei_.}"

Yukio nodded. "_Hai_. {He was one of Japan's finest.}"

"And years later, he can still kick all our asses," Raph observed, seemingly deep in thought.

"In what way?" I added, teasing. 

He seemed startled. "Oh. Shit. Heh. I forgot. You speak English, don't you?"

Leonardo was getting annoyed, and Yukio shot me a warning look. I bowed my head in obedient silence and hid a smile. I already felt welcome here. "{I can see we are getting nowhere so I'll skip the explanation,}" he sighed. "{Our Master Splinter, and the four of us, are not human.}"

I looked up, shocked. "{What are you?}" Yukio asked after a moment's hesitation.

"{We all came into contact with powerful…}" He seemed to search for a word. "Mutagen," he finally finished. I cocked my head, confused. I didn't know that word. Neither did Yukio.

"{What is a 'mutagen'?}"

"{We think it was probably a colloidal gel exposed to massive doses of radioactivity.}" the unnamed figure answered.

That didn't explain much. Even in my native language, I only understood about half of that. "{It transformed us all,}" Leonardo informed. "{But we assure you, our _sensei is _the man you remember, even if he doesn't look the part.}"

Now, I was interested. I wished it was lighter in here. I wanted to see these radioactivated people. I smiled at the thought. 

The one who still had not identified himself stood up, taking his staff with him. He moved across the room, careful to keep a safe distance from us. I couldn't see him. "{We're going to turn on the lights,}" Leonardo announced. "{Don't be afraid.}"

The florescent lights flashed on and I was momentarily blinded. I shielded my eyes for a moment, then looked up. We shared a room with three _turtles._ Except they were tall, and moved like they were human. The one at the door returned to the booth, but remained standing, leaning against his staff. I allowed myself a moment to reflect, before speaking. They weren't really _scary_, except that they all carried weapons. Leonardo had _katanas_ on his back and Raph had a set of sais on the table, in addition to the _bo _the third was leaning on. I studied them carefully. Hamato Yoshi's students. The thought sent a shiver down my spine. I wondered what _he _looked like.

A look of horror was etched in Yukio's face. It was obvious that he would not be the one to break the silence. I stepped forward and bowed. "{I am Tang Rei,}" I informed.

Leonardo smiled. "{You know my name. These are my brothers, Donatello,}" Donatello bowed politely, "{and Raphael.}"

Leonardo stepped out of the way so we could see Raphael, but there wasn't much to see. He was leaning back against the booth, eyes closed behind his red mask. He waved half-heartedly, but made no attempt at eye contact. Leonardo must have done something to him behind his back, because Raphael suddenly jerked awake. "Ow! What the hell was that for?"

I smiled and tried to approach them, but Yukio grabbed my arm. I turned and stared at him, shocked. What was his problem? "{I don't believe you,}" he shot, a look of cold fury on his face. "{Where is Yoshi? Where have you taken him?}"

Leonardo sighed. Donatello looked away. It was Raphael who opened his eyes to glare at my brother. "Hey, buddy…" It took him a moment to remember that my brother didn't understand that language. For a brief moment, I wondered if he spoke Japanese, like his brothers did. He answered my question quickly, with little hesitation. "{You got a problem with it, you can feel free to haul your sorry ass back to Japan.}"

"Raphael..." Leonardo warned.

"{But until you get a lift _back _there, you're stuck here in the good old U-S-A. And you won't live too long without help so you better reconsider.}"

Defiance flashed in my brother's eyes. Uh oh. This wasn't good. I could tell already that Raphael and Yukio were a deadly combination. I pulled away from Yukio's grasp. "{Yukio, please,}" I whispered. "{They're only trying to help.}"

"{I do not trust them, Rei,}" he informed coldly.

"{We have to trust _somebody_,}" I reminded him.

"{I'd much prefer that person be human!}"

"{Yukio, they are Yoshi's students.}"

"_Iie. _{I do not believe them.}"

"{If we aren't who we say we are}," Leonardo started, "{how did we know to meet you here?}"

Yukio had no answer. Leonardo sighed. "{If you don't trust us, at least trust your father.}"

I looked to Yukio, pleading silently. And finally, he relented.

****

DONATELLO:

"{My father said there were four of you,}" Rei began as we walked out the back door. "{Do you have another brother?}"

I nodded. "{Yes. He's at home.}"

"{Why did he not come with you?}"

I hesitated for a minute. "{He's... not really social.}"

Boy, it sounded strange to say that about Michaelangelo. He'd always been the social one, out of all of us. Well, him and Raph, but in totally different ways. Mike had been social on a more personal level, while it was Raphael who had visited the bars and clubs since he was fifteen. But Mike had changed so much in these past few months...

"{Where are we going?}" Yukio demanded.

"{Home,}" Raphael shot back.

A threatening glare passed between them and I sighed. I wasn't surprised. Raph had hated him before they even met. It didn't surprise me that he'd jumped at the first opportunity to get defensive. Rei looked to me. "{Where is home?}"

I sighed. "{We live… underground.}"

She stared at me, confused. "{Why?}"

"{It's less of a security risk,}" I informed. "{Safe, quiet, and rent-free.}"

She smiled, but Yukio was not pleased. "{You live in the sewer system?}"

In answer to his question, Leonardo lifted the manhole cover. "{Come on,}" he directed, looking over his shoulder for spectators.

I climbed down the ladder and stopped at the bottom to help Rei down. She nearly dropped her backpack with the last step. "Want me to carry that?" I offered.

"Oh, no, I'm okay," she assured me. "But thanks."

I looked back up toward the surface as Yukio appeared next to me. Raphael and Leonardo were talking, probably arguing, but I couldn't hear them. I sighed. "{Come with me,}" I offered. "{I'll take you back.}"

****

SPLINTER:

I had never met Tang Shiro's children. His wife was near her due date when I came to the states. But his son's facial features mirrored his own. I bowed respectfully as he entered. "Tang Yukio-san," I greeted. "{You are welcome in my home.}"

He bowed in return, but the tension in his eyes did not subside. He said nothing. I looked toward his sister. "{And Tang Rei. Welcome.}"

We bowed and she cocked her head slightly to the side. "{You are Hamato Yoshi?}" she questioned cautiously.

I nodded. "{I am.}"

She smiled and her eyes sparkled. The hesitation was gone from her voice. "{It is an honor to meet you.}"

I smiled in return. "{The pleasure is mine,}" I assured her.

I turned my attention to Yukio. "{You must be very tired. We have a room prepared for each of you. Leonardo?}"

He stepped forward and gestured toward the open door. "{It's this way,}" he guided.

The three of them disappeared. Donatello headed for his bedroom, leaving Raphael and myself in the living room. I watched him for a moment, knowing he wanted to say something. He sighed and turned away. "I'm going to bed."

"Raphael."

He stopped and turned around. "What?" he asked. "What do you want me to say? I don't like this, and I don't think it's a good idea, and I've already said that." He paused and sighed. "Can I go? Please? I just wanna go to bed."

I studied him for a moment, and nodded. He turned and left the room, closing the door behind him. 

****

REI:

He was sitting at the kitchen table, playing cards with himself. I glanced at the clock. It was after two in the morning. "Hey."

He jumped, startled, and spun around, nearly knocking the chair over. His eyes met mine, then darted to the floor. "What're you playing?"

I glanced at the piles of cards. It looked like he was playing war. He quickly ran his hand over the table, pulling all the cards into a pile. "Nothing," he answered quietly.

I studied him for a moment. "You didn't have to do that," I informed. He didn't answer.

I sat down in the chair across from him. His eyes followed me, as if he were expecting an attack. "Michaelangelo, right?" I questioned. "Is that your name?"

His eyes moved over me. I got the uneasy feeling that he was sizing up an enemy. He nodded slightly in answer to my question. I forced a nervous smile and held out my hand to him. "I don't think we've been introduced. I'm Rei."

He stared at my hand for a moment, then shook it. "You, uh," he stammered. "You speak English pretty well. This your first time in the states?"

I nodded. "I saw a lot of American movies." I couldn't help but smile. "So I know all the slang and stuff like that. Stuff they don't teach you in school." He said nothing. His face was emotionless. "I like western culture," I continued after a moment of tense silence. "It fascinates me."

He looked down at the pile of cards. "Fascinates," he repeated.

There was something about him that immediately intregued me. "I noticed that you also speak my language fluently," I tried, wanting to keep him talking. It was an assumption, since I hadn't actually heard him say anything in Japanese. "Or at least your brothers do."

He nodded, but said nothing. "So which do you consider your first language?"

"Both," he answered quietly. "We were raised with both."

I swallowed hard. The tension in the room could be cut with a knife. "Okay," I sighed. "Well... I'm gonna go. But uh..." I struggled for something to say. "Hey, if you ever need someone to play cards with..." I offered, smiling. It was a futile attempt. He didn't look up.

Feeling a slight hint of rejection, I backed out of the room. Sighing, I headed toward the room they had prepared for me. 

"{What were you talking about?}"

The voice startled me. I looked up to see my brother standing a few feet away. I hated when he did that. "{Nothing of significance, Yukio,}" I assured him. "Not that it's any of your business."

"{Do not speak in English when you are conversing with me,}" he glared.

I smiled wickedly. "{Who says I was talking to you?}" I shot back.

"{There is no one else here.}"

I sighed, realizing he'd missed the point. "{What do you want?}"

"{Was he threatening you? Did he say anything questionable?}"

I was a little startled by the accusation. "{Yukio, I'm surprised at you,}" I started. "{They have opened their home to us and you...}"

"{This is not a home, it is a _sewer_,}" he interrupted loudly.

I tensed and looked around. "{Yukio, quiet,}" I pleaded. "{They might hear you!}"

"{And I do not like you talking to that freak. He's dangerous.}"

I stared at him, shocked. "{He is no more dangerous than you or I!}"

"{He is an animal,}" he growled. "{And I will not allow my sister to associate with such freaks.}"

Indignant anger rose inside of me, though I wasn't entirely sure why. It wasn't like he was insulting me. But I didn't like that he was talking like that about the people who had gone out of their way to help us. "{One of those 'freaks' you speak of is Hamato Yoshi, Yukio,}" I reminded him. "{How dare you speak that way about...}"

He slapped the side of my face. I turned my head, more out of reflexes than from the force of the blow. It wasn't really hard, it just stung. I fell silent. "{You will not speak to me in that tone,}" he snapped.

I bowed my head and said nothing. For a moment, it was silent. When he spoke again, his voice held a softer tone. "{You will not need to endure this for much longer, Rei,}" he assured. "{I will get us out of here. I swear it.}"

I stared at the floor so he could not see the fire blazing in my eyes. "{Yukio, I am content here,}" I answered. "{You need not rescue me.}" _And for your information, I do not feel the slightest bit threatened by them, _I added silently_._

Michaelangelo appeared in the doorway and his eyes darted over us before they dropped. I cringed, hoping he had not heard my brother's ranting. "_Konnichi wa, _Yukio," he said quietly. He left without another word.

****

YUKIO:

It seemed to me that the walls themselves spawned these creatures. I did not even see him until I turned the corner and found him inches away. For a moment, we stared at each other. He twirled his weapon carelessly, his eyes locked on mine. "{Problem?}" he asked.

I was dumbstruck for a moment. "_Iie,_" I finally managed. "{Only talking to my sister.}"

He glanced down at the sai in his three fingers. "Mmm," he acknowledged. "{Guess this must be really hard on her. Coming halfway around the world to a sewer and being locked up down here like a prisoner.}"

I stared at him, distrustful of this sudden sympathy. "{We will not be here long.}"

He nodded slowly, seemingly deep in thought. "{That's too bad,}" he mumbled. He looked up with a wicked gleam in his eye. "{I was kind of looking forward to getting to know her a little better.}"

The tone and inflection of his voice made his motives perfectly clear. Anger welled up inside of me. "{You will keep your filthy hands away from my sister,}" I threatened him.

"{And if I don't?}" he shot back. "{Better be careful, Yukio, we could be a very bad influence on her. She could actually start thinking for herself.}"

"{You have no business interfereing in my relationship with my sister.}"

"{And you have no business interfering in _her _relationship with my brother.}"

I glared at him. "{There will be _no_ relationship between Rei and you mutants,}" I informed. "{I will not allow it. And you would be best to discourage such attempts, if you know what's best for you.}"

He shrugged. "{I'll keep it in mind.}"

I watched him closely as he turned away. "{Oh, and one other thing,}" he added, spinning back around to face me. His face hardened and he gripped his sais tightly. "{I ever hear you talk that way about my brother again and I'll show you just how dangerous I can be.}"


	3. Chapter Three

**

CHAPTER 3 Music, music everywhere... none of it owned by me. ;) I don't own "Loser" by Three Doors down. I don't own "America" by Eminem. Nor do I own the play "Romeo & Juliet" (can anyone guess who owns that one? LOL). I DO however own the sonnet in this chapter. It is mine, ALL mine!!!! LOL Sorry it's taking me longer to get these chapters up. In honesty, the last two aren't done, and I don't want it to suddenly come to an abrupt STOP in chapter 13 (or whatever the last chapter is). So bear with me. And enjoy!

**

REI: 

I watched him from the doorway, unsure of whether or not he was aware of my presence. He moved fluidly, with speed that surpassed any I had seen. He looked to be exceptionally good, though I had no idea what he was doing. I couldn't guess how difficult the _kata _was, or how perfectly he executed it. But from the look of frustration on his face as he came to a standstill, I guessed that it was not as perfect as he had hoped it would be. 

Suddenly, he turned and stared straight at me. I nearly jumped in surprise. "You need somethin'?" he asked. 

I crossed my arms over my chest, hugging myself. "Uh, no, I..." I stammered. I hadn't thought of what I would say to him. "I was just... just watching you." 

He watched me for a moment with that ice-cold gaze that I had come to recognize. I considered turning and running away. But then, the tiniest hint of a smile flickered across his features. I smiled back, nervously. 

"You study martial arts?" 

I shook my head. "My father did," I explained. 

He smiled faintly. "Yeah, I know." 

"How do you know?" I questioned, slightly confused. 

"He learned under my _sensei_, remember?" 

I considered that. "Yes, I guess he did," I smiled. "He stopped shortly after Yoshi, er Splinter, fled to the states." 

"How long did he train?" 

"Only about two years." 

He nodded slowly. "He didn't keep it up?" I shook my head. "Why not?" 

I shrugged. "He doesn't speak of it much. He was quite torn by your _sensei's _excommunication from the clan. He often said he believed it was a plot against him. That Yoshi-sama never would have done such a thing." 

"Yeah, it was," he nodded. 

I smiled. "Though I still do not know what he did," I pressed, hoping that maybe Raphael would explain things that my father always found too difficult to speak about. 

He cocked his head slightly to the side. "He never told you?" 

"No. It bothered him too much." 

He seemed to consider that for a few moments. "Well," he finally mumbled, "Leo could probably tell this story better than I can. But I'll give it a shot. You recognize the name Oroku Saki?" 

I shook my head. "Saki was Yoshi's student," he explained. "And he was really good. He wanted to remove Yoshi so he could take his place as leader of the foot clan. So one day, when they had a master _sensei _come to the _ryu_, he planted a knife and made it look like Saki was going to try and kill the guy. So he was excommunicated, and came to the US." 

"Is that when the foot clan... turned bad?" 

He nodded. "Yeah. With Saki in control." He walked to a corner of the room and and retrieved a water bottle. "You all still have a problem with the foot over there?" he questioned. "I figured they'd be pretty much gone, since Saki's in the US now. Well... sometimes. Or off in another dimension." 

I considered that for a moment. "I know nothing about the foot, really. But I do know that they're still around. They operate as hired assassins." 

He sighed. "Figures." 

I studied him for a moment. "Do all four of you practice _ninjutsu_?" I questioned. 

He froze, and tensed at the question. I wasn't sure why, but I immediately wanted to retract my words. "No," he finally answered. "We all used to, but... things have really changed in the past few months." 

"How?" 

He shrugged, an attempt to end the conversation. "Mike doesn't practice with us anymore. It's a long story. You eat lunch yet?" 

If that wasn't an obvious invitation to shut up, I wasn't sure what was. 

**RAPHAEL:**

"Leo, you have _got _to be kidding me!" I cried. "I gotta live with this girl and I can't _talk _to her?" 

He sighed. "Look, Raph, I'm not saying I agree with him. I'm just saying..." 

"What, did he come to you?" I demanded. "Did he come to you and tell you to talk to me? Seriously?" 

He dropped his head, a mix of frustration and exhaustion. "Raphael, this is a lot for him to deal with..." 

"Don't you think I know that?" I shot back. 

"And I think we need to just give him some time to get settled in," he continued, ignoring me. 

I crossed my arms over my chest. "Leo?" He looked up. "This is ridiculous." 

He sighed. "I know you..." 

"No, just wait," I interrupted. "Just wait. Let me finish." He shut up and watched me with a patient but patronizing look on his face. "First of all, I know he's going through a lot. But so is she, and if she wants to talk, I'm _not _gonna tell her to shut up and go away. I didn't go looking for her, she came to me. And I wasn't touching her or breathing her air or anything else that might be dangerous, okay? We were _talking_. And I don't see what his problem is." 

Leo's eyes dropped. "He doesn't want you making a move on her, Raph. That's all." 

I glared at him. "Well you _don't _have to worry about that, okay? I'm not interested in her, alright? So tell him that. And tell him to lay the hell off." 

I spun around and walked out of the room, my blood boiling. 

**JESSICA:**

The knock on the window was not entirely unexpected, but it would have been pretty dramatic had my roommate been here. "What are you doing here, Raph?" I asked. "You can't just keep showing up unannounced. Sooner or later, you're gonna come invite yourself into my living room and come face to face with someone _other _than me." 

"You alone?" he asked, already inside my apartment. 

"Yes," I sighed. "My roommate is spending the night at her boyfriend's." 

"Mmm," he answered, taking my hands. "Then I guess there's no problem, is there?" 

"Not this time. But one of these..." 

His lips closed over mine, cutting me off, and he pulled me close. I crinkled my nose as he closed the kiss. "You taste like beer," I informed him. 

He laughed. "Sorry." 

I inspected him carefully. "You drunk?" 

"No," he answered, shaking his head. 

I eyed him suspiciously and he shot me a pathetic look, as if he couldn't believe I'd question his honesty. Saying nothing, he leaned into me and kissed my neck. "That by choice or did you run out of money?" I asked. 

"Mmm," he moaned into my neck. "Choice." 

"Why?" I prodded, a little surprised. When he went out to drink, he didn't usually come back until he was drunk off his ass, out of money, or forced to leave because it was past last call. 

He licked my skin, and kissed. I felt my muscles relax, and the annoyance faded. He returned to face me. His dark eyes danced with lust. "Because I know you don't like it when I'm smashed." 

I laughed quietly. "You're sloppy when you're smashed," I explained. 

He pulled me to him and held me tightly. "I love you, baby," he whispered. I closed my eyes, and let him work. 

**MICHAELAGELO:**

_This is getting old, I can't break these chains that I hold... My body's growing cold, there's nothing left of this mind or my soul... _

I watched the flame. Shadows danced over the ink sketch in front of me. A year ago, it would've looked different than it did now. I considered that as I turned the tip of the pen over and over in the fire, watching the plastic burn and the ink sizzle. No, I would've sketched it just the same way. But I would've seen it differently. 

_Addiction needs a pacifier... The buzz of this poison is taking me higher... And this will fall away... This will fall away... _

I stared down at the eyes staring back at me. Why did I do this? Why did I fucking torture myself like this? The answer was easy. Why not? I had nothing better to do. 

Sudden anger overwhelmed me and I threw the pen against the wall. The candle tipped, and I watched wax spill onto the formica top of the desk. Fire caught the tip of the paper and quickly blazed. I watched it in quiet fascination. 

"Jesus, Mike!" 

I spun around, startled. The chair clattered to the floor. In a flash, Leo was standing over me. He had a towel in his hands, and my brain caught up with my eyes to realize that he'd picked it up off the floor. He put the fire out and spun to me. "What the hell are you doing?" he snapped. "Trying to kill us all?" 

_You're getting closer to pushing me off of life's little ledge... _

I hung my head. "Sorry," I whispered. 

"Sorry?" he cried. "Geez, Mike, what's wrong with you?" He calmed down quickly, closing his eyes and breathing deeply. He turned and hit the power button on the CD player, and the music abruptly stopped, leaving us in silence. I tensed. "Are you okay?" he asked, looking back at me. 

I nodded slightly. I could feel his eyes burning into me as I stared at the floor. His hand went to my shoulder. "You sure?" 

"I'm fine," I whispered. 

He sighed and his hand dropped. "Be more careful, Mike. Please? I don't..." 

He stopped. I glanced up and saw him staring down at the sketch. It was half burned, but still identifiable. I wanted to grab it away from him, but I couldn't move. He turned his head away. "God, Mike." 

His voice was faint, as if he were choking. In one quick movement, I grabbed the paper and crinkled it into a ball. I crossed my arms, holding the ball as tightly as I could. Leo didn't move. Finally, he looked back at me, tears in his eyes. "Why, Mike?" he choked. "Why do you do this?" 

"I'm sorry," I whispered, dropping my eyes. 

"No," he protested. "No, Mike, I... I just wanna know why. Why do you...?" 

He tried to find something to say. He couldn't. After a moment of tense silence, he left. 

**RAPHAEL:**

"Rise and shine, sleepyhead." 

I groaned and shielded my eyes from the sudden blast of white sunlight in my eyes. "Ease off, Jess, it ain't even noon yet." 

The bed shifted as she straddled me and pried the sai out of my fingers. "Why do you do this?" she asked. 

"Do what?" I slurred, trying to open my eyes. 

"Sleep with your weapons." 

"Mmm," I moaned as I realized how sore I was. "Habit." 

"That makes me nervous, you know." 

"Yeah, I know." 

I heard a loud thud as she dropped the weapon to the floor. "I wish you wouldn't bring those damn things into my bed." 

She continued, but I didn't hear her. I'd know about it if she were really upset. I was just pushing her buttons. It was a pet peeve of hers, and I knew it. She pinned me by my shoulders as I forced my eyes open. "Got it?" 

"Yeah, sure," I mumbled, not entirely sure what I was agreeing to. I slipped my arms around her waist and pulled her down on top of me. "G'mornin' babe." 

She kissed me and rested her head on my shoulder, her face against my neck. I stretched and recoiled, then glanced at the clock. It was almost ten. I sighed and closed my eyes. "Leo's gonna be pissed at me," I mumbled. 

"Why'd you stay?" 

I considered that for a moment. "I didn't mean to. Just fell asleep." I pulled away slightly and met her eyes. I smiled. "Guess you wore me out." 

She grinned back and touched her finger to my lips. "There's a switch." 

Right on cue, the familiar beeping from beside the bed. Jessica jerked away from me. "That damn thing kept me up half the night," she pouted, reaching down to grab it. 

I grabbed her wrist. "No," I protested. "You don't wanna answer that." 

"I'm not _going _to answer it. _You _are!" 

She held out the handheld communicator. We'd been carrying them since we were 12, and I couldn't break the habit even if I wanted to. I sighed and took it from her, but didn't open it yet. It continued to beep insistently. "You gotta let me up," I informed her. _And I gotta think of some kind of explanation as to where I've been all night. _

She rolled off me and I sat up, reaching for my bandana on the bedside table. "You better hurry or they're gonna hang up," Jess advised. 

"Now _that _would be a tragedy," I mumbled. She shot me a nasty glare and I smiled back. "I'm not that lucky, baby." 

And I was right. I _wasn't _that lucky. I sighed as I pressed the button and the screen popped open. Surprisingly, I saw Donatello rather than Leo. "What's up?" 

"Where the hell have you been, Raph? Leo's about to have kittens!" 

I chuckled. "That's funny. I wanna see that." 

He sighed. "Where are you? Are you okay?" 

I was glad, at least, that Don was not nearly as excitable as my other brother was. "Yeah, I'm fine. I..." I hesitated, not sure how much I wanted to risk telling him. "I spent the night at a friend's. Sorry I didn't call but I got distracted." 

"Uh huh," he mumbled. 

I smiled. "Just know that I'm okay. I'll deal with Leo when I get home." 

"Alright," he sighed. "But just... get home soon, okay? He's pacing around the lair yelling at everyone. And it's driving me up the wall." 

I nodded. "Okay." 

I closed the communicator and dropped it on my lap, pulling my legs in and crossing them. I yawned and hunched over, burying my head in my hands. I felt the bed shift and Jessica settled behind me, her hands on my shoulders. She dug her fingers into the tense muscles and massaged hard. I moaned slightly. "Feels good," I mumbled. 

She leaned into me and kissed my neck. "Why're you so tense?" 

I wasn't sure. The idea of confronting Leo the moment I stepped into the lair wasn't helping, but I knew it wasn't just that. I ran my hand up the outside of her thigh and under the nightshirt. But I stopped. I didn't want to be here for another two or three hours. "I gotta go," I sighed, pulling away from her. I turned on my knees and cupped her face in my hands. "I love you, baby." 

"I love you, too." 

I brought her close into a long, lingering kiss. Then pulled away. "I'll see you later." 

"There's coffee if you want it," she called after me. I waved over my shoulder as I walked out of the room. 

***

I was saved by Rei. She just happened to be in the living room when I came in, and Leo bit his tongue. I headed to my room, grateful for the silence but well aware that he'd probably be banging on my door in a few minutes. 

I was stunned to find that my room wasn't empty. "Mike?" I asked. He spun around and dropped the book he was holding. I stared at him for a moment, not sure what I was going to say to him. I wasn't mad, really. But I was a little confused. "What are you doing?" 

He shifted nervously and looked away. I sighed. My brother was afraid of eye contact. "Nothing." 

I took a closer look at the book on the floor and saw that it was a photo album. I cocked my head to the side. "Y'okay?" 

He nodded, his head bowed. "I... I'm sorry I... came in here. I tried to get ahold of you to ask you but you didn't answer." 

I studied him. "It's okay. Not a big deal. What're you looking at?" 

He afforded a glance around the room, but didn't answer. I saw tear stains on his cheeks, and I knew exactly what he'd been looking at. I stepped toward him and he flinched. "Hey, chill out, bro," I sighed as I picked up the album. I flipped through it briefly, and closed it before dropping it on the bed. 

"You alright?" I questioned. 

He didn't respond. I saw tears pool in his eyes and he cut his gaze away. "If you need anything, bro..." I started. 

"I know, Raph," he interrupted, barely audible. 

I rested a hand on his shoulder. "I mean that, Mike," I enforced. "Anything." 

He nodded slightly, but kept his eyes down. There was a moment of silence, then he whispered something. But I didn't hear him. I was almost afraid to ask him what he'd said. For him to say _anything _on his own was amazing. I didn't want him to recoil. 

"What?" I asked, deciding to chance it. 

He was silent, and I sighed. Damn. 

"We used to be best friends, Raphael," he finally whispered. I stared at him, shocked by his words. "You remember that? All the time we were growing up. And then..." 

His voice trailed off, and he looked up. The tears had overflowed. For the first time in a long time, he looked me straight in the eye. "I know things change but..." 

He clenched his arms over his plastron and shuddered slightly, looking away again. I was still dumbstruck. "Mike I..." 

"Don't," he interrupted, turning away. "Just don't." 

He started toward the door. "Michaelangelo, wait." He paused with his hand on the door handle, but didn't turn back. For a minute, I wasn't entirely sure what to say. "That's not..." I stammered, searching for words. I'd never been good at sentimental crap. But then, he hadn't been good at _any _conversation these past few months. If he was going to talk, he could be damn sure I was going to make every effort to _keep _him talking. 

"I'm still here, Mike," I finally managed. "I mean, I know you changed when..." I caught myself before I said anything I'd regret. I was walking on thin ice, and I didn't want to fall through. "...it happened. But I didn't." 

His eyes met mine again, and the intense sadness overwhelmed me. "Yes, Raphael," he whispered. "You did." He turned and pulled the door open. "We all did." 

I didn't have a chance to protest before he walked out of the room. 

**MICHAELAGELO:**

_The walls drip with blood. It lines the floor, and pools around the bodies of someone's children. I see the frozen expression of fear, the thick sticky life dripping onto the sofa. Fingers spread, mouth open, screaming forever, and forever silenced by blood-lust and anger. Screaming my name, in fire and fury. Begging and pleading for her life. I look down at the weapons in my hands, and around at the death surrounding me, and collapse to the floor, tears mingling with the blood that covers my hands and my conscience. _

I sat bolt upright, clasping my chest and struggling for air. I couldn't breathe. And I was shaking. _Stop it! _I screamed at myself. _Just stop it! It was a _fucking _dream! _

But the visions were real, and they wouldn't go away. I brought my knees to my forehead and clasped my arms around them, sobbing quietly. When the tears had been spent, I lay back down and stared up at the ceiling. But I couldn't sleep. Visions stung at the back of my eyes, and I grabbed my headphones in an attempt to block them out. 

_I never would've dreamed in a million years I'd see... so many mother fucking people who feel like me... Who share the same views and the same exact beliefs... It's like a fuckin' army marchin' in back of me... _

Anger burned steadily in my chest, burning my eyes with hate-filled tears. I hated this. I hated everything about my life. Hated who I was, and what I'd seen. 

_So many lives I touch, so much anger aimed at no particular direction, just sprays and sprays... _

I hated these memories that haunted me. The bitterness that had taken over my life. Walking dead. A skeleton of who I am. No. That's _not _who I am! I was not the person who washed myself in a blood-bath that night. I was not the one who destroyed my life. 

_Straight through your radio waves it plays and plays... _

I didn't know who I was. But I knew who I was not. I was different. I _had _to be different. I couldn't be that person. I hated him. 

_Until it stays stuck in your head for days and days... _

The truth was painful. 

I hated myself. 

I stood and walked to the desk in the corner. The burned tabletop reminded me. That look in his my brother's eyes would haunt me. Just one more thing to add to the list. I shouldn't have let him see that sketch. I should've grabbed it right away. Should have. Would have. Didn't. 

I sat down, grabbing a pen. For a minute, I scratched at the burnt tabletop. Then I stood, and walked back to my bed. Underneath the mattress, I grabbed a notebook, and a ziplock bag. 

**REI:**

I walked past the room half asleep and on my way to the bathroom. I walked back, and noticed something strange. I stopped. "Mikey?" 

There was no sound. I rested my hand on the doorknob, considering carefully. I didn't want to make him mad. "Michaelangelo?" 

He said nothing. Maybe he was asleep. Maybe I was imagining it. I turned the knob slowly and cracked it open. The sweet smell washed around me, and I knew I wasn't going crazy. "What do you want?" he demanded. 

Since it was perfectly obvious that he knew I was here, I went ahead and opened the door. "Mike, are you...?" 

"Get outta here, Rei," he snapped. "I don't want you here." 

His words stopped me, and I considered turning around and walking out. Why was I trying so hard, anyway? What was it about him that was so interesting to me? He obviously didn't want anything to do with me. Or maybe he did, but he certainly didn't trust me. 

Maybe that's exactly what interested me about him. He didn't trust anyone. He was so... dark. But it was fake. It was _so _fake. Like a mask. Every so often, when he smiled, it was as if he'd forget who he was _supposed _to be, and be who he was. Why? Why did he have to be sad? What was he paying for, killing himself day after day? I'd never seen him any other way, but I knew it wasn't right. And I couldn't stand that forsaken look in his eyes. It was as if the world had forgotten about him. 

The air was thick with a sweet smoke. "Good Lord, Mike," I mumbled, shutting the door behind me. "What are you _doing_?" I didn't really have to ask that. I knew. 

He stood up so fast he knocked the chair over. "Leave, dammit!" 

I didn't answer him, only walked over to the desk. "My god, Michaelangelo, where did you _get _this?" I whispered, picking up the bag. 

"It's not mine." 

I studied him for a moment. His eyes were clouded. I felt like I could cry. "Mikey, why are you doing this? Do your brothers know?" 

I raised my hand to the side of his face, but he hit it away. Probably hard enough to make a bruise. He spun away from me and walked to the bed. "No," he snapped. "They don't know. And don't fucking tell them." 

I looked back down at the bag and shuddered. I knew nothing about drugs, but this much marijuana could not have been cheap. Where did he get it? And _why_? An open notebook, scribbled with black ink, caught my eye. 

_Those bleeding, lifeless eyes are watching me   
Now and forever crying tears of pain   
I know that my hand made or left you slain   
And from these memories I seek to flee _

I live, though living dead have come to see   
I'd die that you could somehow live again   
Yet in my dreams forever you will reign   
Through death and boundless realms you come to be. 

You tell me that you love my child-like way   
And smile as foolish antics fill the space   
Between your soul and mine. And though the years 

Will change me, you will never age a day   
So let your smiling, crying, mourning face   
Forever drench my heart in bloody tears 

I stared at the paper, shocked. Not only by the words, but also by the neatness of it. There were hardly any changes or revisions. He couldn't have possibly written that off the top of his head... 

"Mike..." I stammered, turning back to him. He was sitting in the center of his bed, rocking back and forth slightly. Tears were on his cheeks. I left the bag on the desk, but brought the notebook to him. I sat down, legs crossed, about a foot in front of him. He looked up, his distant, emotionless eyes darting impatiently. I held the notebook out to him, and he stared blankly at it for a moment. 

"Did you write this?" 

"Yes," he shot back. 

I stared at him, dumbfounded. "Just... just now? Like... freewriting?" 

He glared at me as he snatched the papers away. "Got a problem with that?" 

I opened my mouth to speak, but for a moment, no sound came out. "No, it's..." I finally managed. "It's just that... it's good." 

He watched my expression, his eyes distrustful. "I mean, it's... dark. But it's really good." Nothing. He didn't react. I swallowed hard and ran my fingers through my hair. "Do you, uh, write a lot of poetry?" 

I bit my lip as he hesitated. Part of me was screaming to get out of here. But an ever-increasing part of me was begging to stay. 

"Yes," he finally whispered. "Sometimes." 

I gave a small sigh of relief that he had answered me. "I... could never really get the hang of sonnets," I admitted, looking away. "Not that I didn't try." I laughed nervously. "Shakespeare was one of the main reasons I wanted to learn English." 

"They taught you about him in school?" he assumed. He sounded cautious, but he was talking. That was a good sign. 

I nodded. "Well they... His Romeo and Juliet is translated into Japanese. But it's obviously not near as good as it is in English." 

After a moment of silence, he mumbled a response. But I couldn't hear it. "What did you say?" 

He glanced up at me. "But soft, what light through yonder window breaks?" he whispered faintly. "It is the east, and Juliet is the sun." 

For a moment, I was shocked into silence. Then, I smiled. "Arise, fair sun and kill the envious moon," I continued quietly, "Who is already sick and pale with grief, That thou her maid are far more fair than she." 

He cut his eyes to the floor. "It is my lady, Oh it is my love, Oh that she knew she were." 

"The brightness of her cheek would shame those stars as daylight doth a lamp." 

"Her eyes in heaven would through the airy region stream so bright..." 

"That birds would sing and think it were not night." 

He didn't answer. The comfortable atmosphere that came of the "conversation" was gone. After a few long seconds, he looked back up. "You're good," he mumbled. 

I smiled, slightly more at ease. "So are you." He said nothing and I shifted nervously. "Where did you study Shakespeare?" 

He shrugged and stared down at the notebook in his lap. "Splinter made us. He was big on culture, both Japanese and American. And I liked it, so I..." 

He didn't finish. "You what?" I pressed. 

He shrugged. "I memorized some things." 

"Like what?" I questioned. "Entire plays?" 

He shrugged again, as if to say "no big deal." I stared at him, shocked. I never would've thought that of him. "Well, I... only memorized certain passages. Mostly from Romeo and Juliet and from Macbeth." 

"She should have died hereafter," he recited. "There would've been a time for such a word." 

I laughed quietly. "Goodness, is there anything you _don't _have memorized?" 

"Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, creeps in this petty pace from day to day." I studied him carefully, eager to see if he would, or _could_, continue. He probably could have, from the look in his eye. But he stopped, and shifted nervously as his eyes darted away. 

A headache was forming behind my eyes from the thick, sweet air. "Hey, Mike?" He glanced back at me, questioning silently. "Why do you do it?" 

"Do what?" 

"Drugs?" 

He sighed and looked away. "Look, it's not like I'm shooting up or anything, okay? It's only..." His eyes met mine and locked there. He stopped mid-sentence, and the annoyed look faded to one of sadness and confusion. I watched silently as his eyes filled with tears. He dropped his head and stared down at the notebook in his lap. "I don't know," he whispered faintly. "I don't know why." 

"Are you addicted?" 

He shook his head. 

"For real?" I pressed, disbelieving. 

"I'm not," he assured. 

"Then why... permanently damage your body like that?" 

He was silent for a long time. "I guess it just... takes the pain away, you know? Even if it's just for a few minutes." He looked back up at me. "And it's worth it, Rei. It's worth whatever it's doing to my body." 

I shook my head. "If it makes it all better, why do you write things like that," I nodded toward the notebook, "when you do it?" 

He opened his mouth to answer, but no sound came out. He turned away. "It isn't that it's not there, Rei," he finally whispered. "It's that... it doesn't feel real." 

I gave him a minute, if he wanted to say anything more. But he didn't speak. I stood up. My head was beginning to pound. "You should sleep," I informed him, glancing at the clock. "It's two in the morning." 

I walked back over to the desk and rested my fingers lightly on the bag filled with death, considering my options. Finally, I turned back to him. "Don't do any more of this," I begged. "Please?" 

He looked up, and there was a moment of silence. "Don't tell my brothers," he pleaded. 

I swallowed hard. "We make a deal," I whispered. "You get rid of it and I won't tell." 

The look on his face hardened. "You blackmailing me?" he demanded. 

I shook my head. "I'm pleading with you. But if I can't convince you to stop, maybe they can." 

He was silent, considering that. "I don't want them to know, Rei." 

"Then throw it out." 

"And how do I know... you won't tell?" 

"How do I know if you actually _do _get rid of it, or just hide it in a better place?" 

He looked away. There was a long silence. "I..." he finally stammered. "I'll take care of it. Just..." His eyes met mine. "Just don't say anything. Please." 

"I'll promise if you will," I bargained. 

He studied me for a moment, then nodded. I smiled faintly and started toward the door. "Good night, Michaelangelo." 

"Night." 


	4. Chapter Four

****

CHAPTER 4

****

REI:

"{You okay?}"

The voice jolted me out of my trance, and I shook my head, trying to clear my thoughts. "{Yes, I am fine. Just thinking.}"

Leonardo sat down on the couch, his legs curled under him. "{What about? Something bothering you?}"

I sighed and stretched my arms above my head, reaching toward the ceiling. I'd been sitting here for a long time. I studied him for a moment, considering what, if anything I wanted to say. "{Hey, Leo, not that I think you'll answer me or anything... but what's wrong with your brother?}"

He studied me, his face emotionless. "Michaelangelo?"

"_Hai_."

He held my gaze for a moment, and then looked away. "{I don't know, Rei,}" I mumbled. "{Some stuff happened a while ago and he never really recovered. But I don't know why.}"

"{What kind of stuff?}" I questioned.

He shifted nervously. "{I really can't talk about it.}"

"{I didn't think so,}" I sighed. I grinned at him. "{But I figured I'd ask. You all sure do guard that secret, whatever it is.}"

He cringed. "{It's... not really a secret. It's just not my place to talk about it.}"

I nodded. "{Yeah, that's the general consensus. And I'm guessing the only one who _can _talk about it is Mike, right?}"

He smiled, but said nothing. I took that as an invitation to drop it. I yawned and stretched. "{Know where my brother went?}" I asked.

Leonardo sighed. "{No, not really. He walked out of here, but didn't tell anyone where he was going.}" I nodded slowly. "{And I really wish he'd not do that. It's dangerous.}"

I smiled. "{I'm sorry. My brother is very stubborn sometimes.}"

Leo grinned back. "{It's okay. I'm used to it.}"

****

MICHAELANGELO:

I sank down into the warm water. No, not warm. Hot. It was so hot it made my skin tingle. Kinda like the feeling when your foot falls asleep after you've been sitting in one place for too long. I could hear the soft hissing and cracking of the bubbles. Why on earth was I doing this? I hadn't done this in _years_. No, it hadn't been years. It had only been a couple of months. Although it sure did _feel _like years. It was a different life, in a different world. 

Every so often, there came an event that stopped time. And when it started again, it was backwards, and confused. Like the birth of Christ. But it would happen to everyone someday, on a smaller scale. Everyone would have that turning point in their lives, for better or worse. Everyone changed. Everyone grew up. Childhood was over the moment you knew you were going to die. I'd heard that somewhere. And it was true. Death stopped time. Death changed everything. 

I heard the door open and looked up. Rei gasped and slammed it closed again. "Omigod, I'm sorry."

I couldn't help but smile. "It's okay, Rei. Not like I've got anything to hide." For a moment, it was silent. Somehow, I knew she was still there. "You need something, Rei? You can come in."

The door cracked open and she peeked inside. "Are you… are you sure?" she asked hesitantly.

I studied her for a moment, and nodded. "Yeah. It's okay."

She glanced over her shoulder, then slipped inside the room, closing the door behind her. "I was just… I need a band-aid."

I pointed to the medicine cabinet. "Over there."

I watched her carefully as she pulled the cabinet open and rummaged through it for a moment. Then she turned and jumped onto the counter, raising her knee in front of her. It was scraped. "How'd you do that?" I questioned. 

"Your stupid brother," she scowled.

"Which one?"

"Raph."

I should've known. She glanced up and flashed me a wicked smile. "It's okay though. It was an accident. And even if it wasn't, I deserved it."

"Why? What'd you do?"

"Sprayed him with perfume."

I laughed in spite of myself. "You did _what_?"

She shrugged, still grinning. "Yeah. That body spray stuff, you know? That constantly sprays, not just squirts out a little bit at a time."

I smiled and shook my head, looking away. She dropped her legs off the side of the counter. I could feel her eyes on me and I tensed under her gaze. "What?" I asked, turning back to her.

She shook her head. "Nothing. Just… remembering."

"Remembering what?"

She sighed and looked away. "My mother used to run bubble baths for me before she died."

I studied her for a moment. "How'd she die?"

"Car accident." She clasped her hands together. "Well, sorta. She was hit by a car. I was eleven at the time."

"I'm sorry," I mumbled.

She shrugged. "Not your fault."

There was a long silence. "You okay?" she asked.

"Fine," I answered automatically. "Why?"

"I dunno, you just seem… depressed."

_No shit? Here I thought I was thrilled to be alive. _I kept my smartass comments to myself. "Why do you say that?"

She shot me a pathetic look. "Well, gee, I dunno Mikey. Maybe just the way you stay locked in your room all the time and don't speak to anyone unless your very existence depends on it."

I tensed, immediately defensive at the mention of the name. I _hated _that name. And I didn't need to hear this from her. She needed to leave. "There's more to it, isn't there?" she sighed.

"What do you mean?"

"You're not really like this, are you." It wasn't a question. She crossed her legs and leaned back on her arms. It was obvious that she wasn't planning on leaving. "How long has it been, since you've been yourself?"

I glared at her. "What makes you think you have the right to say that?" I snapped. "You don't know me. You don't know anything _about _me."

She sighed. "Of course not. You wouldn't let me if I tried."

I opened my mouth to say something back to her, but realized I had nothing to say. I looked away again, deciding to let it go. There was a long silence. It wasn't really a tense silence; it wasn't uneasy. It was just that neither of us really had anything to say. I wondered why she wasn't leaving. "Who are you, Mikey?" she finally whispered, more to herself than to me. I glanced at her and saw her staring at the floor. "Really?"

I put aside the reflexive anger and considered her words for a moment. I used to know the answer to that. But now, I wasn't really sure. "I… I don't know," I answered hesitantly, surprised by my own honesty. "I know who I _was_," I mumbled hesitantly. "And I know what I've _become_. But I really don't think I know who I am anymore."

There was a moment of silence. I closed my eyes and lay back, sinking underneath the water. I was shocked that I'd just said that to her. I was being more honest than I figured was safe. 

"I think you should take up your training again," she finally whispered. 

"No," I answered automatically.

"With your brothers," she continued, ignoring me. "I think it would help you to _find _who you are."

"No, Rei," I said again, hearing the icy tone in my own voice.

"Why?" she questioned. "What's so wrong about…?"

"You wouldn't understand."

She sighed. "How can I, Mikey, when you won't let me?"

I sat up. "Why do you call me that?" I demanded harshly.

"You really wanna know?" Her response caught me off-guard. I froze and turned to stare at her. "I'll tell you, but you have to promise not to get mad." I was stunned. I hadn't expected her to actually have a reason. "You promise?"

I nodded slightly, not entirely sure where she was going with this. "There's a _nunchaku_ in your room with the name 'Mikey' carved into the handle."

I felt anger burn in my chest. She'd been going through my room? I bit my tongue, remembering my promise. "What does that have to do with anything?" I demanded.

"You carved that, right?"

"So?" I shot, standing up. "What's your point?"

She sighed. "It's just that it's perfectly obvious that whatever happened to you hadn't happened back then. And somewhere along the line, you lost your identity."

Anger flooded through me. "God damn it, Rei," I snapped. "You have _no _right!"

She stood up and faced me. "You can't deny that something happened to you and you can't deny that it changed you. Everyone sees that. Maybe I'm just the only one with the nerve to come out and _say _something about it."

I stepped out of the bathtub. Anger surging through my veins. "What makes you think you have a right to say that?" I snapped at her. "You didn't know me! You _still _don't! You don't know anything about me!"

"Because you don't even know yourself!" she shot back, her voice just above a whisper.

"And why the _hell _is that any of your business, huh?" I yelled. "What the fuck do you want from me? I don't need a goddamn psychiatrist!"

She fell silent. We stared at each other for a moment. "Why, Michaelangelo?" she breathed. "Why do you hate him so much?"

I spun away from her. She was prodding at nerves that still hurt fiercely. And she had _no _right to. Why the hell was I talking to her? And why was she so fucking determined to _make _me talk. Damn her.

"He was a child, Rei," I growled. "A fucking child."

"What's wrong with being a child?" she cried. "There's nothing wrong with that!"

In an instant, I'd whirled back to face her. She almost fell over backwards trying to stop herself from tripping over me. "Yes, Rei, there _is _something wrong with it!" I yelled at her. "When you're 16 years old and have the maturity of an 8 year old, there's a _big _problem with it!"

For a moment, she was stunned into silence. I jerked away from her, threw the bathroom door open and made a beeline for my room, slamming the door behind me. I guess I wasn't really surprised when it opened again, but it _did _piss me off. "Get the hell out of my room!" I shot at her.

"Who told you that?" she demanded.

"I said get out."

"No."

Rage burned steadily in my chest. "What do you mean, no?"

"I'm not leaving until you tell me who said those words to you."

I glared at her. "Fine," I snarled. I flopped down on the bed and pulled the blankets over my head. I waited. There was no sound. After a few minutes, she left. Good. I was more stubborn than she was.

****

SPLINTER:

I had perhaps heard more of the conversation than I was supposed to. Being not entirely human, my hearing had become impeccable. I heard their argument, and her footsteps as she walked into her room and flopped down on her bed, right on the other side of the wall. Then I heard her crying.

I rose from my bed and left the dark room. I moved silently, receiving only brief glances from the turtles, and knocked lightly on the door. A moment later, she peeked out. She wiped her eyes and bowed. "Splinter-sama," she greeted. "{What can I do for you?}"

"{You have been crying, child,}" I whispered.

She seemed startled. "{I am sorry. Did I disturb you? I did not think I was being loud.}"

I smiled. "{No, of course not. May I come in?}"

She stepped back, opening the door. "{What troubles you, Rei-chan?}" I asked gently.

She looked away and brushed her eyes roughly with the heel of her palm. "{Your son just reminds me of a friend of mine.}"

"Michaelangelo?" I assumed.

She nodded. "_Hai_."

"{How so?}"

She was quiet for a long time. Then she looked up at me again. "{I don't know how to explain it, really,}" she whispered. "{I mean, I don't really have a _reason _to believe it but… I just do.}"

"{What do you believe, Rei-chan?}"

She bit her bottom lip and shifted nervously. "{That there is more to him than what he allows us to see,}" she finally answered. "{And I believe that it's dangerous for him to mask his emotions the way that he does.}"

Her voice echoed a concern that I was not unfamiliar with. "{Why do you say that?}" I questioned.

She sighed deeply. "{I had a friend who…}" She paused. "{I don't know. I really don't know Michaelangelo. But like I said, he just reminds me of a friend I used to know who changed a _lot _when his girlfriend died. And he was really depressed for a few months before he killed himself.}"

I bowed my head out of respect for the deceased. "{I am sorry,}" I whispered.

"{Yes, so was I,}" she continued. "{Especially since I always thought he would come out of it, you know? I never really tried to help him.}" Our eyes met again. "{Splinter-sama, I mean no disrespect. But please take care that the same does not happen to Michaelangelo.}"

I smiled faintly. "{You need not worry, Rei-chan,}" I replied. "{I keep a close watch over my son. He is in no such danger.}"

She smiled, assured by my words. "{That is a relief to me.}"

There was a moment of silence and she looked away. "{I don't suppose you could tell me what made him this way,}" she mumbled.

I shook my head. "{I have no right to discuss the events of my son's life.}"

She sighed. "{That's what I thought.}" She looked back at me and smiled. "{But I figured I'd try anyway.}"

I rested a hand on her shoulder. "{I believe, Rei-chan, that if your patience triumphs, you will find out for yourself who my son really is.}"

"{You agree, then?}" she questioned. "{He is masking himself?}"

I dropped my hand and my eyes. "{I am at liberty to say nothing,}" I informed her. "{But if you seek answers from him, I believe he may tell you himself.}"

I said the words with little hesitation. For based on what I had heard, they could not be more true. 

****

REI:

"I'm sorry."

I jumped, startled. I'd been dozing, and didn't hear the approach. Michaelangelo stood behind the couch, his hands resting on the cushions. I sat up slightly. "For what?" 

He shifted nervously. "For… blowing up at you like that. I said I wouldn't get mad, but I did. And I'm sorry."

I was somewhat surprised that he had even given the argument a second thought. "Just don't try to help me, okay?" he continued quickly. "We'll get along fine if you just leave me alone."

I frowned. "Like you get along with your family?" I questioned. I immediately regretted the words. I didn't want to make him defensive again…

He hung his head. "You can't help me, Rei. Don't try. You'll just piss us both off."

I studied him for a moment, then sat up. "You know what I want, Mike?" I questioned. "I don't want to counsel you or help you." Our eyes met. "I want to be your friend. Will _that _piss you off?"

He considered that for a moment, and smiled faintly. 


	5. Chapter Five

****

CHAPTER 5

RAPHAEL:

In the month that followed, I grew to hate Yukio. And at the same time, his sister became more and more welcome. It wasn't for all of the wonderful conversations we had. Hell, we hardly spoke 2 words to each other. But she talked to Mike. She talked to Mike a _lot_. And for the first time in months, he talked back.

I didn't hear it. I was too busy trying to stay strategically placed between him and her jackass brother. But I saw the results, however subtle they were. It wasn't like he got better overnight. But the first time he joined us for a meal without being forced to, I think everyone took notice.

"So were you _ever _close with your brothers?"

I paused and stepped back before I was seen. I wasn't normally the type to eavesdrop, but I couldn't help it. The question struck me. I was curious as to how, and if, he would respond.

"Yeah, I…" he answered hesitantly. "Up until a few months ago, actually."

"What happened?"

That question, he didn't answer. He probably would've shocked me into a heart attack if he had. "They worry about you, you know," she continued, undeterred.

"Yeah, I know."

"Talk about you a lot more than you know."

From the teasing tone in her voice, I could tell she was leading him on. And he walked right into it. "What do they say?"

She laughed quietly. I peeked into the living room and saw them sitting on opposite ends of the couch, facing each other. "Nothing bad," she smiled. "They just worry about you, like I said."

He made a face. "That concerns me."

"Why?"

"Just…"

He looked up and immediately fell silent. Someone had walked in. I followed his gaze and groaned inwardly. I stepped out of my room and made my presence known. "Hey Mike. Rei."

I turned my eyes toward Yukio. He glared at me, then turned away, like I knew he would. I smiled to myself and walked into the kitchen.

****

YUKIO:

"{Do you realize that there is _no _food in this house?}"

I scowled at my sister's choice of words, and turned my attention to Leonardo. "{We must get food,}" I agreed.

He sighed. "{We need money first. I'll take care of it tonight.}"

"{What will we do until then?}" I demanded.

"{Exactly where do you guys get your money, anyway?}" Rei interrupted. I turned and glared at her, but realized that I too was interested in the response.

Leonardo and Raphael, who had been graciously silent so far, exchanged glances. They made no attempt at answering. "{You steal it,}" I realized in disgust.

Leonardo sighed. "{No, we don't steal it. Not… really. We just bust a lot of drug deals.}"

"{Blood money,}" I scowled.

Anger flashed in Raphael's eyes. "{No, stupid, drug money. There's a difference. And before you go judging us, _you _try living on nothing, when nobody knows you're alive and nobody cares. You do whatever the hell you have to do to make ends meet.}" 

Leonardo glared at him, and they exchanged words in English. Rei chuckled. I did not ask what they had said. "{What will we do for tonight?}" I demanded again.

"{Shut up, Yukio,}" Raphael snapped. "{You'll eat, okay? I promise.}"

I shot him an evil look and he smiled back.

****

LEONARDO:

There was something about the air that I didn't like. Something threatening, but I wasn't sure exactly what. Regardless, we had to go. Thank god for Vinny's, and for the fact that they fed us for free. 

"Hey Raph?" I called up ahead of me. He turned and looked over his shoulder. "Ease up, will ya? Something's not right here."

He stopped, turned fully around to face me, and crossed his arms over his chest. "{What is it?}" Yukio asked from beside me.

I shook my head. "{I'm not entirely sure. Something just... doesn't feel right.}"

"You're paranoid, Leo," Raphael informed me, a smirk on his face. I ignored him.

I sighed. There was no getting through to him. But at least he was listening, even if he was being a smartass about it. He gave us a minute to catch up. "Is it safe now, Leo?" he grinned as we approached. "Can we go now or are the boogy-monsters gonna get us?"

"I oughtta hit you, you know that?" I shot at him, somewhat annoyed.

He laughed. "_Try _it, Leo. I _dare _you."

I ignored him and walked forward. There _was _something wrong. It was like we were being watched. Could Raphael not feel that? Why was I the only one who knew? But I did know. I knew it beyond a shadow of a doubt. Raph continued to make rude comments, most of them in English for the sheer fact that Yukio did not like the fact that he could not understand the language. In the month that had passed since Yukio and Rei had come to live with us, Raphael had spoken less Japanese than he normally did in a week. What he did speak was riddled with insults and slang, and I knew it was just to spite the language and culture of the teenage boy that he had chosen to make enemies with. Only in Splinter's presence did he control himself, as we all knew that Splinter would be just as offended as Yukio was.

Once we reached the surface, Raphael fell silent. There, he could feel the danger as clearly as I could. And he realized I wasn't just being paranoid. There _was_ something wrong. The alley was empty, the back door half-hidden by garbage cans. I looked around once more before knocking on it. Suddenly, as if it were a crescendo in a musical piece, the danger escalated. I could feel the attack coming and spun around just in time to see throwing stars hurling through the darkness. They weren't aimed at me. 

"Yukio, get...!" 

I stopped short as Raphael tackled Yukio to the ground. I stepped in front of them and reached onto my back, pulling my _katanas _from their sheaths. I scanned the area thoroughly, but saw nothing. In a moment, Raphael was standing beside me, weapons drawn. There was nothing. Even the intuition of danger was gone. There was no one here.

"Where'd he go?" Raph asked.

I glanced back at Yukio. He was standing with his back to the wall, his face white as a sheet. If not for him, I would go find out where the attacker had disappeared to. But I wasn't about to leave him here with Raph. That was homicide. The door I'd knocked on earlier opened and the familiar man stepped out. "Leonardo," he smiled. "Raphael. Welcome."

I glanced once more at the darkness around us and turned to him. "Why are you standing at my door with weapons in hand?"

I sheathed the _katanas_ and smiled in return, trying to calm the uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach. "False alarm," I assured him, although I highly doubted that. Those _shurieken _didn't come out of nowhere. Someone had thrown them. And the obvious target was Yukio. I didn't like that.

****

SPLINTER:

"_Sensei, _{are you awake?}"

The worried tone in Leonardo's voice spoke volumes. I sat up. "{Come in, Leonardo.}"

He slipped into the room and closed the door behind him as I lit the oil lamp next to the bed. "{Is something wrong?}" I asked. "{It is very late.}"

He bowed slightly. "{Yes, I know. I apologize. Were you asleep? I didn't mean to wake you.}"

I shook my head. "{I was not sleeping. Is everything alright?}"

He sat down on the floor beside the bed, legs crossed underneath him. "{You never told us under exactly what circumstances are Rei and Yukio here, in the states?}" he questioned. "{Are they in danger? Is that why they're here?}"

I considered that for a moment. "{Why do you ask?}" I replied after a moment of hesitation.

He sighed. "{We encountered... something. Someone attacked us, but they were gone before I had a chance to see who it was.}"

His words confused me for a few seconds. "{You did not see your attacker?}"

He shook his head. "{We were in the alley, behind Vinny's, and someone threw three _shurieken_. We think Yukio was the target.}"

"{Was he injured?}" I asked, concerned.

His eyes fell. "_Iie_. {But we couldn't leave him to try and find who had thrown them. We never saw anyone.}" There was a moment of silence. "{I gave the throwing stars to Donatello and he confirms that they were tipped with poison. We fear it may have been a _ninja_.}"

His fear was fully justified. _Shaken _were not a choice weapon for the average offender. If this was true, and I had no reason to doubt Leonardo's account, then Rei and Yukio had been followed. For what reason? It had been my understanding that they would be safe in the United States. I had not pressed for details concerning Tang Shiro's business dealings for that very reason. Now it seemed that I was caught unaware. Perhaps it had been no coincidence that Shiro had sought me out, rather than another with a less notable reputation.

"{I do not know what danger they faced in Japan. Tang Shiro said only that he had made wrong decisions and he feared that they may be in danger if they remained in the country. We spoke with the assumption that they would be safe upon their arrival in New York.}"

He sighed. "{Well, I fear they may not be. His ability to stay hidden and to leave so quickly and silently suggests that we may be dealing with someone of equal rank at least.}"

I nodded slowly. "{Then we must take every precaution,}" I answered, "{to ensure their safety.}"

****

REI:

I awoke to the sound of someone knocking on my door. "Rei? We need to talk to you and your brother. You awake?"

"I am now," I called back, rubbing my eyes. I sat up and stretched, the blanket falling off my shoulders. I hadn't bothered to get dressed last night, and I was half-naked.

"Well, come on in the living room. We gotta talk to you."

"Right."

I yawned and fell back on the mattress again, spread-eagled. I didn't want to get up. I'd had a hard time sleeping last night, and I was exhausted. A burst of willpower brought me up to a sitting position. I hit the radio on the bedside table and let music fill the room. That would help me to wake up, I knew. I hung my head between my shoulders for a minute and breathed deep before standing up. For a few seconds, I felt like my legs were going to fall out from underneath me. I steadied myself and looked around for my clothes.

I was the last one to arrive in the living room. Everyone was there, and they looked up as I walked in. I leaned forward on the back of the couch. "Something wrong?" I asked.

"{How much do you know about why you're here?}" Leonardo questioned. 

I stared at him for a moment, confused. "{I know very little,}" I finally answered, somewhat bitterly. "{My father never found it necessary to tell me the reasons behind his decisions.}"

All eyes turned to my brother. He shifted nervously. "{I know nothing.}"

I knew that was a lie, but I remained silent. Raphael glared at him "{What _do _you know?}" he demanded.

"{Yukio, we believe that you and your sister may be in danger,}" Leonardo explained. "{And if you want us to try and protect you, we need to at least know what we're dealing with.}"

A hardened look crossed Yukio's face. "{My father did not discuss his business dealings with his children,}" he replied, his voice indignant.

"{What business was he involved in?}" Donatello questioned.

"{He was a building contractor,}" I answered. 

Yukio glared at me. "{Quiet, Rei,}" he ordered. "{You know nothing.}"

"_Kieuseru, _Yukio," Raph shot back. "{She can talk if she damn well pleases.}"

I glanced at him, surprised that he would use such language in his _sensei's _presence. "{Enough,}" Splinter warned. Raphael fell obediently silent. Splinter turned to Yukio. "{Your father had enemies. What do you know of them?}"

Yukio shook his head. "{My father and I did not speak of personal problems.}"

"{_His_ personal problems landed _you_ halfway across the globe,}" Raph answered. "{I find it hard to believe you know _nothing_ about why you're here.}"

Yukio glared back at him. "{Unlike some people here, I do not disrespect my...}"

"{Enough!}" Splinter ordered forcefully. "Raphael, if you cannot control yourself, you will be asked to leave."

Fury streaked across Raphael's face. "I didn't...!"

He stopped when he saw the glare on his _sensei's _face. Leonardo's expression mirrored the annoyance. Raphael let out a frustrated growl and walked out of the room. I sighed as I watched him leave. "{What kind of enemies could a building contractor have had?}" Donatello thought out loud.

"{I never considered his work to be my concern,}" Yukio reaffirmed.

Michaelangelo mumbled something into the space between his chest and his knees. He was hiding his face, and I barely heard him. "{What did you say?}" I asked.

He breathed deep and sat up, but kept his eyes trained on the floor. "I said maybe it had nothing to do with work," he mumbled, in English. "Sometimes people refer to things as business, but they don't mean it like that."

"{Did he actually say it was work related?}" Leonardo asked Splinter.

My brother stood up. "{Why does it matter?}" he demanded. "{My father was a good man. He would never compromise the safety of his children!}"

Leo rose to his feet. "{We don't mean to imply that he...}"

"{I know very well what you're implying!}"

I glared at Yukio. "{They're just trying to help,}" I shot at him. "{And you know it. Relax, will you?}"

He walked away. I stared after him. Leo collapsed on the couch again. "{That could've gone better.}"

"I'm sorry," Mike whispered.

"For what?" I questioned.

He shrugged slightly. "I shouldn't have said that."

I grinned. "Earth to Mikey. Yukio doesn't even understand English. He had no clue what you said."

Michaelangelo hung his head, and said nothing.


	6. Chapter Six

****

CHAPTER 6

****

LEONARDO:

"Dude, _go _to _bed_. What on earth are you doing up?"

I glanced up and saw Donatello walking into the living room. "I can't sleep."

He stopped. "Is something wrong?"

I sighed and shook my head. "It's just… Mike."

He perched on the arm of the nearby easy chair, a concerned look on his face. "What about him?'

I stared down at the floor for a moment, leaned forward, and hid my face in my hands. "I don't know, Donny. I just… I don't know what to… support."

His look changed to one of confusion. "What do you mean?"

I sighed and leaned back against the sofa. "Yukio is worried about Rei, but frankly… I don't know if I want to step in the middle of it, you know?"

He considered that. "What is Yukio worried about?"

I closed my eyes. "He doesn't want Rei to get hurt and he doesn't want her falling in love with someone as different as we are."

There was another moment of silence. "Well, you wanna know what I think?"

"What?" I mumbled.

"I don't think it's any of your business. Or his."

I sighed. "That's kinda my thinking too." I looked over at him and our eyes met. "And I'm seeing a difference in Mike that I think…" I considered my words carefully. "I think he might be starting to… come out of it. And I think she's helping him."

He said nothing. I stood up, frustrated, as thoughts flooded my mind. "And yes, I agree with Yukio when he says it's not a good idea for them to be sleeping together, but I don't think they are!"

Don shook his head. "It's none of your business, Leo," he informed me. "Just stay out of it."

I sighed. "I can't." He returned the words with a pathetic look and I turned away. "No, seriously, Donny, I can't. I have to side, one way or the other. Because if I step back, Yukio will just go after Mike directly, and I honestly don't think Michaelangelo can handle that. Then I'll _have _to side."

I looked back at him and he sighed, shaking his head as he stared at the floor. "What?" I prodded.

"Leo, if you've thought about this long enough to think that far ahead, you already know exactly whose side you're going to take." He looked up, a tired smile on his face. "I know you, Leonardo. You couldn't turn your back on Mike if you _wanted _to. If Yukio goes after him, you'll jump right in the middle, weapons in hand, and we _both _know it."

I smiled. He _did _know me. "Yeah," I whispered, almost afraid to admit it.

He stood and rested a hand on my shoulder as he passed. "Let's just hope it doesn't come to that, huh?"

****

MICHAELANGELO:

_The voice is choked by pain and fear… anguish that would forever shatter childhood dreams of peace and happiness. One last scream, before she chokes on the blood…_

She screams my name.

***

I wiped the tears from my cheeks and closed my eyes again. I knew I wouldn't be sleeping again. The bloody, painful nightmares wouldn't allow that. But I had nothing better to do. I had a headache, like I always got when I cried for too long. I glared at the ceiling, then turned on my stomach, burying my face in my arms. My tears were all spent by now, but I still wasn't tired. I sighed and sat up. I had nowhere to go, but I didn't want to stay here.

I wandered out into the living room and shivered from the cold. It was freezing in here. I wondered what it was like on the streets. I had managed to avoid going topside for over two months. God, had it really been that long?

There was no sound in the lair. I lit a candle and carried it with me into the _dojo_. I don't know why I was heading there, but it was where I found myself. I sighed as I looked around the room. Why was I here? I hadn't been in this room for weeks. There was simply no reason for it.

_"Why, Mike? Why do you do this?"_

I set the candle on the floor and looked around as the light flickered over the walls. _"No, Mike, I... I just wanna know why. Why do you…?"_

I didn't know why. But I knew that regardless of the reason, this was only going to cause pain. Something drew me. Maybe it was simply the masochism that had become so much a part of me…

__

"Michaelangelo, don't lose your patience."

He blocks every attack, and brings his weapon down toward me. I catch it with the chains of my nunchucks_. Still on defense, I try to pull back and give myself more time. But he attacks the handles I'm gripping and knocks the weapons out of my hands. Stunned for only a moment, I rush him. He drops the _bokken_ and catches my upper arms. I realize my mistake too late. He turns and drops onto his back, throwing me over him. I hit the wall and slide to the floor in a significant amount of pain._

"I'd say you just got smoked, Michaelangelo," Raphael grins. I shoot him a nasty look.

Splinter is not so informal. "Indeed, Michaelangelo has much to learn about patience."

I ran my hand over the weapon rack, fingering lightly over the black wood of the _nunchaku_ hanging from the wall. It was cool to the touch. The chain links between the two handles were like ice. I brushed it lightly and closed my eyes as tears burned..

****

RAPHAEL:

I breathed deep and stared up at the ceiling. I wasn't really tired. Worn out was more like it. I'd been here for almost two hours now, and the majority of that time was not spent watching TV and eating popcorn. The figure next to me moaned slightly as she pressed hard against my side, her arm sliding across my chest. She nuzzled against my shoulder. 

I turned my face to her, wondering if she was still awake. Her eyes were closed. I kissed her forehead, damp with sweat, and brushed her hair out of her eyes. If she _was _awake, she'd be asleep in a few minutes. I could wait until I was sure. I stretched out on the bed, feeling along the headboard as I extended my arms, then let my body go limp. I had to be careful. I knew I could fall asleep here _real _easily. But I didn't want to have to deal with the resulting lecture. If I left now, I could make it home before midnight.

I considered that for a moment, and looked over at Jessica. I smiled. Maybe I should just stay. Let them worry. They shouldn't be waiting up for me anyway. I was a big boy. I could take care of myself. The smile fell as I realized the truth of the situation. They would be waiting up. At least one of them would be. I didn't know which was worse. They'd both lecture. Splinter would expect an explanation, and that was hard to satisfy without flat-out lying to him. But an argument between Leo and I could easily turn to blows with the way things had been lately.

Michaelangelo's face flashed across my mind. I wasn't sure exactly why. I hadn't been thinking about him, or anything remotely close to him. But he was in my thoughts pretty quickly. I wondered where he was. He'd actually left the lair, on his own, without telling anyone where he was going. For him to emerge from his room was a pretty big deal. But to leave the lair? I wasn't real sure where he'd go. He hadn't done any training in over two months, so I highly doubted he was out there busting heads. But where else would he be?

That thought interested me so much that I actually got up, out of bed, and stretched. Jessica didn't stir. Good. She was asleep, and I didn't want to wake her. I'd worn her out pretty good. Not to mention myself. But hunting down my brother sounded more exciting right now than sleep did.

I kissed Jess on the forehead and slipped out of the room silently. I was met with a warm, mid-August breeze, and I made sure to close the window behind me. Up on the rooftop, I looked out over the city. It was dark and silent, lit by a dim silver-blue light from the nearly-full moon. The buildings were outlined, but nothing was clearly defined. He'd be up here, I immediately knew. He'd always liked the rooftops. It was just a matter of finding which one he was on.

He was close to home, on top of an apartment complex. I watched as he leaned forward and looked over the ledge at the dark streets below. "Mike?" I called.

He spun, startled, and pressed back against the ledge. "S'okay," I grinned. "It's just me, bro."

I watched as he relaxed slowly and turned back to the dark city. "Whaddaya doin'?" I asked as I approached. He shrugged, and said nothing. "It's kinda late. Aren't you usually asleep by now?"

Again, he shrugged. Again, it was quiet. He wasn't in the mood for talking. I sighed. I never thought I'd be able to say that about Michaelangelo. I didn't pressure him. I just turned and leaned against the ledge next to him. For a long time, it was quiet. "Hey, Raph?" he finally asked.

"Yeah?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"Shoot."

He hesitated. For a few seconds, it was silent. I stared out over the buildings we walked in silence. "You remember how...?" He stopped. "There was..."

I grinned. "Spit it out, Mike. Can't be _that _bad."

He was quiet for a few seconds. "Do you have a girlfriend now?" he finally asked.

I turned to face him. "Why?" I questioned, cautious.

He smiled. "Don't worry, Raph. I'm just curious. I promise I won't tell Splinter."

"Or Leo," I added, turning from him again. "They're oblivious and I'd like to keep them that way."

"So you do then?"

"Yeah," I replied with some hesitation.

"You fuckin' her?"

I think my eyes got a little wide at that question. I hadn't really been expecting it. "Why do you ask?"

He sighed. "Just tell me, Raph. You know I'm not gonna say anything."

I considered that for a minute. Yeah, I knew he'd keep his mouth shut. It wasn't that I didn't trust him. I just wasn't sure what he was getting at and I didn't like that. "Yes," I finally answered. "I am. Why do you care?"

He was quiet for a few more seconds. "A long time ago, you told me that that helped you to get a grip on who you are. You remember that?"

Oh, so _that's _where this was going. "Yeah, I remember."

"You still believe that?"

I considered it for a moment. "I don't think it was so much that it told me who I am as that it told me what I'm _not_."

He looked at me with a confused expression on his face. "Whaddaya mean?"

I shrugged. "I can't explain it, Mike. It's just... I felt different afterwards. After that first time, I just didn't feel like such a freak."

I waited for some kind of explanation from him, but he made no attempt to clue me in. I was just about to press him when he turned to me. "You think it had anything to do with her?" he questioned. "Or was it just the sex?"

That one made me think for a minute. My first time had been kind of awkward. I'd been seeing her for about three months, and we ended up going our separate ways two days after we slept together. Of course, we knew it was going to happen. She was only fifteen, and her parents were moving. She had to go with her family. It was sort of a bittersweet farewell. I never heard from her again. I never really expected to.

"I don't think she could've done the things she did to me if I didn't love her," I finally answered, somewhat nervously. I wasn't too sure I wanted to be talking about this. It was damn good ammo, if he ever wanted to use it against me. "Why do you ask, Mike?"

He shook his head and looked away. Suddenly, it dawned on me. "You thinkin' you and Rei?" I questioned, a little surprised. I knew he was talking to her, but I hadn't figured they were _that _close. My brother wasn't loose. He wouldn't be considering that kind of a relationship unless he was seriously in love with her… and I choked on that thought. It was awfully sudden.

He sighed and buried his face in his hands. "I don't know what I'm thinkin' right now, Raph," he mumbled. "I've got a lot on my mind."

I thought about that for a minute. "You love her?"

"I dunno," he answered. "I think so."

I sighed. "Don't do it if you don't. You'll just regret it."

He glanced over and shot me a knowing smile. "This coming from someone who's been laid by half the girls in any given bar in the state of New York?"

I wasn't quite sure how I felt about that statement in and of itself. But the fact that it was coming from my brother definitely made me a little nervous. "First time's different, Mikey," I justified. "Just trust me on that."

He sighed. "Yeah," he mumbled half-heartedly.

For a moment, he was silent. He was engrossed in thoughts I wasn't sure I wanted to know about. But I decided to risk it. Whatever it was he was thinking about, it was obviously pulling him back into that silent depression. "You okay?" I asked.

He breathed deep and closed his eyes. "You know, it's funny," he mumbled. "There's a part of me that still feels like... _me_, you know?"

I studied him carefully, saying nothing. He finally looked up and our eyes met. "I mean, there's this little part of me that still wants the same things I did before..." He hesitated. "...everything happened. Still values the same things, thinks the same way. And just... every so often when someone says something and I think of something funny to say back..."

He didn't finish that sentence. "But you don't say it," I reminded him.

"No," he answered. "I don't. And I don't know why. It's like I can't. It's not... a big enough part of me, you know? Or something like that. But it feels like... Every time I'm around her... it's like that part just keeps getting bigger. Every time I talk to her." He looked up and swallowed hard. "I feel like she's... I mean, I know it sounds crazy. But it's like she _knows _who I am. And I don't. Does that make any sense?"

I smiled and nodded. "Yeah, Mike. Believe me, it makes perfect sense."

He looked away. "I don't really understand it. It's just... the way I feel around her. And I'm wondering if this is what it feels like to fall in love."

Boy, he was really being honest. I understood the questions he'd asked me now. "I mean," he continued, sighing deeply. "I'm not, like, head over heels or anything weird like that." He looked up. "But I don't ever remember you being like that either. You didn't even tell anyone about her."

"Except you," I corrected.

"Because I asked," he reminded me.

"Splinter asked."

A surprised look crossed his face. "You lied to him?"

"No, I didn't lie," I answered quietly. "I just didn't answer. There's a big difference."

He smiled. "He would've known anyways," he reminded me. "He'd know just by the fact you didn't answer."

I nodded. "Yeah. But I learned a long time ago not to incriminate myself. It's easier to stand by 'I didn't do it' than 'I had a damn good reason'. Facts are easier to argue than philosophy."

"Facts," he repeated quietly. There was another long silence. "You know, I don't think I really know anything for sure anymore. Everything's relative now. Nothing's set in stone."

"Nothing ever was."

He looked up at me. I glanced up at the sky and guessed that it was probably getting pretty close to midnight. "I'd better get back," I mumbled. I flashed a smile at my brother. "Splinter's probably sitting up waiting for me."

"Sneak in quietly," he advised, grinning back at me.

"Ninja stealth," I confirmed. "The art of invisibility." I considered that for a moment. "'Course it doesn't ever seem to work with _Sensei_."

"He can smell you a mile away." Mike laughed. "Gotta be some advantage to being mutated into a rat."

I made my way to the fire escape. "You comin' home anytime soon?" I questioned. "Just in case he asks? Or did I not see you?"

He was quiet for a moment. "Between the two of us, I'll be back before noon." 

I nodded and turned away. "And Raph?"

"Yeah?" I asked, spinning to face him as I backed away.

He forced a smile. "Thanks."

I stopped and stared at him, confused. "For what?"

"For... everything."

I smiled. The look on his face said everything his words could not. "Hey, I'm here for you, Mikey. Whatever you need. Let me know, bro."

He nodded. I left.

****

LEONARDO:

I knew Rei wanted to get out of the lair. That much had been evident for the past three weeks. But she, unlike Yukio, wouldn't just walk out and put herself in danger. She either had some common sense, or hated the idea of confrontation. Yukio and I certainly had enough confrontations. He was as bad as Raphael, though in a totally different way. He was much more manipulative. Raph would come out and say he wasn't going to tell me where he'd been. Yukio instead told me the name of a place, which I expected was a lie half the time, and went on about how difficult it was to live here and how he wished that he could go home and be a part of society. After a few minutes of that, I just wanted him out of my face. 

Now, Yukio and Raphael were both gone. Surprisingly, Michaelangelo was missing too. That worried me, slightly, but Splinter said that he'd talked to him before he left and there was no cause for alarm. Donny and I were left with Rei, and her pacing made the decision for us. We went up to the surface.

We weren't gone for very long. But when we got back, we were met with a shock.


	7. Chapter Seven

****

CHAPTER 7

JESSICA:

"Jess? Baby, hey, wake up. I gotta talk to you."

I moaned softly, and he turned me onto my back none-too-gently. "Geez, Raph," I moaned. "What's the problem?"

"Gotta talk to you. Come on."

"I'm _up_, Raphael, what do you _want_?" I was more than a little annoyed that he'd woken me up in the middle of the night.

He brushed my hair out of my face. "Jess, listen to me. We need your help."

As I slowly came to, I realized how serious his tone was. I opened my eyes. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, a worried look on his face. "What help, Raph? What's the matter?"

"Somebody… knows where we're staying and we think they may be after two friends of ours who are staying with us."

I sat up, his words ringing in my ears. "What? What happened?"

"Someone was in the lair. We think..."

"Is everyone alright?" I cried, looking over him. He didn't look like he was hurt.

"Yeah, everyone's okay. No one was there. But we..."

"Who do you think it is?"

He sighed, slightly annoyed at the interruptions. "We don't know. But we know they're ninjas and we thinkthey're pissed."

"Why?"

He took my hands. "Jess, just listen, okay? I'm not worried about us, we can take care of ourselves if they come back. But these two friends of ours could be in a lot of danger. Is there any way they can stay with you, even just for the night, 'til we figure out what the hell we're going to do about this?"

I was speechless. "Because they will probably come back, and I don't want them to find these friends of ours when they do. We'll get them into a hotel or something after tonight, so it's not going to be dangerous for you. But it's just…"

"What about you?" I interrupted.

He stared at me for a moment. "What do you mean?"

"What if they come back and you're there?"

He laughed quietly. "We can take care of ourselves, baby."

"What if they catch you sleeping or something? And are you going to go to this hotel with them? How long is this going to go on?"

He sighed and shook his head. "We'll deal with that later. Right now, the immediate problem is that we need to get them to a safe place."

"But.."

"Jess, please," he whispered, brushing the side of my face. "We got nowhere else to turn. And I don't want this girl to get hurt."

"Girl?"

He sighed, and I knew what the look on my face must be saying. "She and her brother came here from Japan. Their dad was afraid they were in danger. And apparently, they are."

I studied him for a moment and sighed, waiting for him to continue. He didn't. "So is it just her you want me to help?"

He grinned evilly, but the smile fell without an explanation. "No, it's her and her brother. If I had my way, it'd just be her."

A thought struck me. "Uh, Raph, do they even speak English?"

"She does. He doesn't."

I groaned. "Raph..."

"Look, if it'll make you feel any better, I'll stay with you, okay? We just need a place to..."

"Raphael, how the hell am I supposed to explain that to Mandy?" I demanded, cutting him off.

"Mandy?"

"My roommate," I sighed. "Nice to know you listen to me when I tell you things."

He sighed. I leaned forward, my elbows on my knees. "Raph, seriously. I can't think up a good enough explanation for why two Japanese kids need to stay here and if I try to explain it even _somewhat _truthfully, she'll flip out."

"They're 17 and 20," he corrected. "Not really kids.

I buried my face in my hands. "Okay, hang on. Just... give me a minute to think."

My mind raced. Having them come here was hardly an option, unless I could get Mandy out of the house. No. This was an immediate thing and right now, she was asleep. Maybe if they were out early enough... But what would that solve?

Suddenly, a thought struck me. "You think they'll need to be hidden for more than, like 2 weeks?"

He considered that for a moment. "I don't really know. Can't think that far ahead. We aren't gonna leave them with you for that long."

I shook my head. "No, I was just thinking..." I considered my words carefully. "My parents are in Europe for two weeks and I have the key to..."

"Where?"

I stared at him, for a second, not sure why he'd ask that. "France," I answered hesitantly.

"No, I mean where's the house?"

For a moment, I was speechless. He was one step ahead of me. "Port Huron. Michigan."

He groaned. "Shit, Jess, that's too fuckin' far."

I smiled, liking the idea more as I thought about it. "It's not that far," I protested. "A few hours. Besides, you could use a vacation and I have some sick days to kill."

He sighed. "Baby, this isn't a vacation. This is running from _ninja_ assassins."

I rose to my knees. "They'll be safe," I reminded him, resting my hands on his shoulders. I straddled him, my bare legs against his thighs. "Nothing to worry about."

"Yeah, until when, Jess?" he sighed. "We gotta come back sometime. They're not just gonna go away baby; we need to deal with this. We just don't want Rei and Yukio to get hurt in the mean time."

"You said you needed time to think," I reminded him. "Wouldn't it be easier to think on a nice..." I kissed his cheek, pressing against him. "...warm, beautiful..." I moved down, kissing a trail to his neck. "...beach?" He didn't react, only leaned back on his hands. I licked along his salty skin. "Quiet, romantic sunsets..." Still nothing. I pulled away slightly and held his face dangerously close to mine. "I have this black bikini..." I breathed, allowing my lips to brush his.

Finally, he laughed, and wrapped his arms around me. I kissed him deeply, running my fingers lightly over his arms. "Think about it," I whispered. "Private, relaxing..." I could tell he still wasn't convinced. Amused, yes. But not convinced. I smiled as I thought of something to convince him, and pressed my cheek to his. "Sex on the beach, under the moon and stars."

He pulled away, a knowing smile on his lips. I grinned back. I had him. "Convince my _sensei_, and you got a deal."

****

LEONARDO:

"Where is he?" I thought out loud. "What's taking him so long?"

"Leo, relax," Donatello sighed. "He's gotta talk to him."

"Her," Mike corrected quietly.

I turned to him and saw him staring at the ground. Rei was standing inches away from him, and next to Splinter. Yukio was set apart from the group. "What do you mean?" I demanded.

Michaelangelo shrugged. "He didn't say it was a guy, just that it was a friend."

"How do you know that?" He shifted nervously but said nothing. "Have you met her?"

He sighed. "No, I haven't. I don't know anything, just forget I said anything."

I stared at him for a moment, then at Donny, who shrugged. I looked back toward the door leading up from the parking garage to the apartment complex. "He needs to hurry up," I mumbled, pacing. "Every minute increases the danger that we are in."

"Leonardo."

I turned and faced Master Splinter. A tired smile reflected the calm inside of him. "We are in no danger here," he informed me. "If they had wanted to harm us, they would have stayed in anticipation of a battle."

"An ambush," Donny agreed.

I glanced back and forth between the two of them, and looked away. "I'm sorry," I mumbled. "You're right. I just... don't like this. I don't like it at _all_."

I glanced up and saw Splinter smile again. It amazed me that he was so unaffected by the fact that someone had been in the lair. I would've thought it to be the foot clan, except nothing was touched. The rooms were in perfect order. The only think out of place was the _shurieken _in the door, holding a piece of paper that had caused a violent, terrified reaction from Yukio. It said nothing, really. Only his name, in Japanese, and another name that I did not recognize. But regardless of the meaning, it was obvious that somebody knew where he was staying. And it was obvious that they were angry, as the letter was written in what looked like blood.

But from the start, Splinter had remained unfazed. While Yukio tried to hide his panic, and the rest of us searched the lair for danger, he watched calmly, holding Rei's hand as she cried silent, terrified tears. It was as if he knew something we didn't. That there was a reason why he knew we were not in danger. But if there was, he was not explaining it.

He made no suggestion as to what we should do. But upon Raphael's suggestion that we find a safehouse for Rei and Yukio, he nodded his approval. I had insisted that he come, although he would have preferred to stay. I was not comfortable with the fact that we had been discovered. And I couldn't shake the feeling that we _were _in danger.

I looked back at the door across the parking lot. He had five minutes, and I was going to look for him.

****

JESSICA:

It was a dramatic switch. In all the time I'd known him, Raphael had been strongly opposed to the idea of me meeting his family. Now, all of a sudden, he was shoving me at them. He barely gave me a chance to get dressed before dragging me out the door. "Where are we going?" I asked, tucking in my shirt.

"Parking garage," he answered, pulling me along by the hand. I felt like a child being tugged behind a hurried parent. I ran along behind him, until we hit the stairs. Then I couldn't keep up. 

"Raph, I'm gonna...!"

I lost my balance and tumbled into him. He spun and pressed against the wall, gripping the banister with one hand and catching me with the other, before I fell down five flights. A wave of heat rushed through me as my body registered the near-miss. I clung to his arm, wrapped around my waist, and raised my eyes to glare at him.

He smiled sweetly. "I love you, honey," he offered, a playful attempt at avoiding a confrontation.

"Yeah, _right_," I shot back, regaining my balance. My pulse was still racing. 

"Hey, at least I caught you," he defended.

I placed my hands on my hips and shot him a pathetic look. "At _least_."

He slipped his arms through mine, circling my waist. I sighed as he pulled me close and pressed his lips to mine. I draped my arms over his shoulders and pulled away slightly. "Hey, Raph?"

"Yeah, baby?"

"Can you at least give me a clue as to how I'm supposed to act?" I questioned. "Because this is a little sudden, you know? And I'm not entirely sure how to be."

He brushed my hair out of my eyes. "Baby, don't worry about it," he whispered. "I don't think they're gonna be too critical."

For some reason, I wasn't very comforted by that.

****

MICHAELANGELO:

Jessica surprised me. I expected someone more... flashy. But she had plain brown hair, hazel eyes, and wore jeans and a T-shirt with sandals strapped to her feet. I could tell Raphael hadn't given her much time to get dressed and get down here. I could also tell that introductions made him incredibly nervous. He avoided eye contact with us as he gave names, and she shook hands. But he glanced up and caught my eye as she and Splinter exchanged hellos. I smiled my approval, not that I thought it really mattered what I thought, and he grinned back. Just the slight vote of confidence seemed to put him more at ease.

Splinter seemed approving, too. Maybe it was just because she was polite. Or maybe because she _wasn't _the flashy, exotic dancer type that he probably expected. She in no way understood Japanese culture, and flashed a terrified, what-do-I-do-now? look at Raphael when Yukio bowed in greeting. I couldn't help but smile.

Finally, she turned and looked at Splinter. "I, uh..." she started. "I want to help you guys. But staying here isn't really an option because of my roommate."

Splinter smiled politely. "We understand."

"No, uh," she stammered. "You can't stay _here_, but there is somewhere else." 

She shot a pleading look in Raph's direction, and he stepped up. "Jessica's parents are in France," he explained. "They have a house in Michigan, on Lake Huron..." Leo frowned at the idea, and Raph looked away from him, hesitating to continue. The look on Splinter's face was almost one of amusement. "They'll be gone for two weeks and the idea was that we could all go there and figure out what's going on here..." He shot an evil glare in Yukio's direction. "Maybe get _this _asshole to talk," he pointed angrily. Turning back to Splinter, he dropped his eyes. "And figure out what we're going to do next."

He expected a lecture for the language, the tone, the suggestion, or maybe all three. I expected the same, but figured it would be in Japanese because I didn't think Splinter would chastize him in front of Jessica. He surprised us both. "I agree."

The look of shock on Raphael's face mirrored my own. Leonardo wore a look of horror. "Master, we can't just leave the city. It won't solve anything!"

The seemingly undisturbed look on _Sensei_'s face had changed. He appeared serious now, and deep in thought. "It will give us time to evaluate what may be happening. And to see if they have the will, or ability to follow us, or if they will return to the lair to further threaten us."

Leonardo opened his mouth to protest, but no sound came out. He sighed and looked away. Splinter looked to Jessica and smiled. "You are gracious to offer us shelter."

Leo wanted to protest. He _really _wanted to. But he said nothing. Only closed his eyes and breathed in deeply. Donatello seemed disinterested in the conversation. He was eyeing the van, probably wondering if there was anything he needed to fix on it before we took it all the way to Michigan. Yukio looked to Rei for an explanation. "{What are they saying?}" he demanded.

"{We're all going to Michigan,}" she answered. "{To hide, and to figure out what to do next.}"

He seemed to have mixed emotions about that, but said nothing and nodded his approval.


	8. Chapter Eight

****

CHAPTER 8

****

JESSICA:

"Hey, teach me how to drive this thing," Raph grinned as we walked to my car.

I cringed at the thought before it even fully registered. "Don't you know how to drive?" I asked as I threw my backpack into the back seat. It was a stupid question, because I knew he did. That wasn't his point.

"Van, motorcycle, yes," he smiled, grabbing my wrist before I got into the driver's seat. "But not a stick shift."

I glanced down at the car. "It's not easy," I warned him. "And I don't want you getting all pissy on me."

He took both of my hands and kissed my cheek. "I won't," he whispered in my ear. "I promise."

He embraced me and I sighed, giving in. But I knew he would. "Get in," I relented.

"Are we leaving already?" he questioned. "I'm not sure everyone is ready to..."

"Don't worry about it," I grinned, opening the passenger side door. "It'll take you fifteen minutes to pull out of the parking space."

****

DONATELLO:

"Um," Leo started. I stood up, away from the engine of the van, and followed his gaze across the parking lot. Jessica's car jerked and lurched before stalling, half out of the parking spot. 

"Jessica forget how to drive?" I grinned, putting the dipstick back into the motor oil. I couldn't find anything wrong. Maybe, if we were lucky, this would be an uneventful trip. We rarely left Manhattan. But when we did, something _always _seemed to go wrong.

Michaelangelo craned his neck and smiled faintly before looking away. "That's Raph."

I looked again, more interested this time, and chuckled. "So it is." I glanced at Leonardo. "Think we should go harass him?"

Leo smiled at the idea, but shook his head. "I don't think that's wise."

"{How far away is this place?}" Yukio demanded.

"{Quite a long way,}" Leo answered. "{Jess said it was in Michigan, and that's a couple hundred miles away, at least.}" He turned to me just as I closed the hood of the van. "{You think it would be faster to go through Canada?}"

I considered the idea, and shook my head. "{Even if it was, you think they'd let four mutant turtles out of the country?}"

He smiled slyly. "{Good point.}"

Squealing tires caught our attention and we turned to see Jessica's car hurling toward us. "Geez!"

There was more squealing as he slammed on the brakes, and the smell of burning rubber surrounded us in a cloud of blue-gray smoke. I looked up slowly. The first thing I saw was Michaelangelo shielding Rei, and Leo standing in front of Yukio. I turned my gaze toward the car. Jess was white as a sheet. She reached over and shut the ignition off, then slowly pried Raphael's hands off the wheel. He was talking, probably to the car. I knew whatever language he was speaking in was bound to be riddled with expletives. But I couldn't hear him.

I slowly relaxed, as did my brothers. The car was about three feet away from Mike and Rei. "{Everyone okay?}" Leo asked.

A chorus of "yes" answered him. I glanced back and saw Jess turn Raphael's face toward her. She said something, and he nodded, then she got out of the car. He leaned back and closed his eyes. I smiled at her. "You alright?"

"Think I just lost about twenty years of my life but yeah, I'm fine."

"It's a manual transmission?" I assumed.

"Uh huh," she mumbled, running her fingers through her hair.

"Maybe you'd better drive," Leonardo suggested. "I'd hate for Raphael to total your car."

She smiled. "No, it's... it's okay. I just... I'm alright."

I grinned, but there was no more to that conversation. "How many hours we gonna be driving?" Michaelangelo asked.

"I don't really remember," she answered. "It's been a long time since I've been out there. But we should be there before dawn. I hope."

"You sure your parents will be okay with this?" Leonardo questioned.

She laughed. "My parents are in Paris right now. And they'll be there for another week at least. Besides, they hardly ever go up to that house. They spend most of their time at the house in Florida."

Yukio closed the door to the van. "{If we are ready, I would like to leave now,}" he pressed. His nervousness was evident.

"What did he say?" Jess asked.

"He wants to leave," I answered. "Are we ready?"

"Yeah, sure," she smiled. "Let me look at a map first though, okay? Do you guys have one? I think mine is buried in the back of my car."

I relayed the message to Yukio while Leonardo retrieved the atlas from the front of the van. She opened it on the hood of the car and we stood back as she outlined our trip, running her finger along the roads. At one point, she veered away from the interstates and traced along a highway that looked to be much smaller. 

"It's fifty miles shorter to take this route," she explained. "But it's a lot of back roads. We'll be miles away from civilization." She smiled. "Of course, with you guys riding shotgun, that's not necessarily a bad thing."

I smiled.

KIN:

"{They have taken essential supplies,}" I observed as I walked through the quiet room. "{They will not be back.}"

"_Iie_," the figure next to me agreed, eyeing an empty pizza box on the coffee table. "{They will not.}"

"{Where could they have gone?}"

He thought for a moment. "{Their resources are limited,}" he thought out loud. He turned and our eyes met. "{I will check the house of the woman the one was talking to. She was likely their method of escape. You check the apartment offices to see if she has a car registered. And get the security cameras of the parking garage. Perhaps we can find approximately what time they left.}"

I stared at him. "{They won't get far,}" I reminded him. We had been prepared for such attempts.

"{They will not,}" he nodded. "{But we must know in which direction they headed if we wish to intercept them.}"

****

YUKIO:

"{Something is wrong with the vehicle.}"

Donatello sat up and rubbed his eyes. He crawled into the passenger seat. "{Where are we?}"

I gave him the name of the route. We were the only ones on the street, and the car in front of us. I had not seen another vehicle in the past hour. It was two in the morning. The van lurched and Donatello flew forward into the dashboard, catching himself on his arms. "{Pull over,}" he yawned. "{Flash your lights first so Jess will know something's wrong.}"

I did as he ordered, and we came to a stop at the side of the road. We were in a wooded area, the full moon the only light for miles. Leonardo appeared from the back. "{What's going on?}"

"{Something's wrong with the van,}" Donatello answered. "{And I'm hoping it's not serious because it looks like we're in the middle of nowhere.}"

We opened the doors and were met with a rush of cool air. I looked around the darkness, scanning the area for any sign of danger. We were alone here. Jessica's car stopped, and began to back up. She and Raphael joined us at the front of the van. Jessica asked something in English, and Leonardo replied. The other turtle slowly emerged, yawning and stretching.

After a few minutes, Donatello stepped back and sighed. He relayed his findings in English, and the crowd around him conversed for a moment, then simultaneously groaned. "{What did you find?}" I demanded.

"{Somebody put water in the gas tank. Or some kind of liquid. Since we filled up the gas tank right before we left, we really didn't notice it until now}"

"{It was probably our guests at the lair,}" Rei answered. Her voice held a biting tone.

Splinter emerged from the van. "{What has happened?}" he questioned.

Donatello explained the situation to him. Raphael broke away from the crowd and walked to Jessica, putting his arm around her shoulders. She leaned into him, arms clenched over her chest. I crinkled my nose in disgust. "{How do you propose we get out of here?}" I demanded.

Donatello sighed. "{Ordinarily, you could flush the gas out. But... I don't know.}" He walked to the driver's side. "{We've still got a quarter tank.}"

"{What difference does that make?}"

"{The foreign substance separates itself from the gas. Kind of like oil and water. That's why we didn't have any problems earlier. There was enough gas in the tank to where the engine only took in pure gas.}"

"{So what must be done?}" Splinter asked.

Donatello glanced at the van. "{I can siphon out the water from the tank, but then we need gas.}"

"{I saw a gas station about fifteen minutes ago,}" I relayed, "{but it was closed.}"

There was a moment of silence. "{What do we do, Master?}" Leonardo finally asked of Splinter.

The rat closed his eyes for a moment then opened them again. "{We have no choice but to stay here until it is light. Then Jessica can return to the gas station and retrieve fuel.}"

I tensed. I did not like the idea of staying here. This smelled of a trap. But no one else seemed to notice that. "{We'll go back into the woods,}" Leonardo informed. "{We all have sleeping bags. And it'll be safer away from the road, if this _was _some kind of a sabotage.}"

"{I don't know how I feel about leaving all our equipment here,}" Donatello protested.

"{Well, I don't know how _I_ feel about leaving _you_ with it,}" Leonardo replied. "{If someone wanted us to break down, they could be following us. And if they were interested in the equipment, they would've taken it when they put water in the gas tank.}"

"{Leonardo is right,}" Splinter agreed. "{Let us go into the woods where we will have a place to hide should there be an attack. In the morning, we will leave here.}"

I glanced toward Rei. She leaned against the driver's side door of the van and stared down at the ground. I wondered if she felt as uneasy about this plan as I did.

****

REI:

A nightmare awoke him. I could tell by the way he bolted upright, looking around in a frantic attempt to figure out where he was. He didn't see that I was awake, and I didn't say anything, only watched him in the flickering remains of the oil lamp. Leonardo had been opposed to the idea of a campfire, citing that it may start a larger fire in such a wooded area. Aside from that, he did not want to attract attention. But he allowed the lamp, with the hopes of keeping animals away. Still, he slept with his _katanas_ at his side. And I was grateful.

Michaelangelo hunched over, bringing his knees to his chin. He hid his face for a few minutes, and I watched him silently. I wondered if I should tell him I was awake. I decided against it. He probably wanted to be alone, as he usually did. Though he had begun to open up a little bit more in the past few days, he still kept high walls around his emotions. I rested my head on my arms and studied his form in the pale moonlight. I was almost afraid to admit it, but he was actually quite attractive. Though not in nearly so good of shape as his brothers, and clearly a different _species _than I was, there was something about him that commanded my attention.

I considered that for a moment, and sighed. My interest in him had at first been purely professional. Well, perhaps "professional" wasn't the word for it. But I had cared very little for him as a person. I knew that the only interest I had in him was because he had reminded me of Taro. I had perhaps thought that if I could somehow help him, it would be like helping my friend. My heart still ached over the loss of him, and the fact that I had done nothing to prevent his death. 

But things had changed, over this past month. I had begun to see Michaelangelo as his own person. Deeply troubled, yes, but also increasingly interesting to me. Underneath the mask of silence he wore, was a person just like who I had forever wished to be. The person I may have been, in another life, had I not been born into the formal, serious and rule-abiding family I was.

Michaelangelo kicked the sleeping bag aside. I sat up as he stepped over his brothers, his back turned to me, and headed deeper into the woods. I followed him. I don't know why, exactly. Maybe it was just because I couldn't sleep. But whatever the reason, I got up and walked after him. I knew it was dangerous, but I didn't realize just _how _dangerous until I lost sight of him. I walked a little faster, hoping I'd catch up. But after a few seconds of that, I realized that it wasn't going to happen. I stopped, and looked back, and realized I wasn't entirely sure how to get back.

"Why are you following me?"

The voice made me jump, and I spun around. I saw only darkness around me. "Michaelangelo?" I asked hesitantly. Was I hearing things?

"Up here."

I looked up, and saw his figure outlined against the limbs of a tree. He was about fifteen feet up, leaning against the trunk, one leg hanging down and the other bent. For a moment, I wasn't sure what to say to him. "I… I'm sorry."

"For what?" he asked.

"For… following you."

The pale light on his face shifted as he smiled. "If you were sorry, you wouldn't have done it."

I considered that for a moment. He was smiling, and I doubted that he was mad. I sighed and hung my head. "And I'm sorry that you have to be here," I mumbled. "That I'm causing you all so much trouble."

He was quiet and I looked up to see him lean his head back against the tree, staring up at the sky through the leaves. "It's not your fault, Rei," he reminded me.

I approached the tree, but couldn't see an easy way to climb it. "Over there," he directed. I looked up and over to where he was pointing. It was a nearby tree. I stared at it for a moment, not sure if I was that daring. He didn't move, and I decided I didn't have much of a choice.

I left my flip-flop sandals on the ground and pulled myself up the branches, one at a time. When I reached his level, he smiled and held out a hand to me. I took his invitation and he pulled me in front of him. I was a little surprised. "You're stronger than you look," I mumbled. "Now that you've taken up the hobby of eating."

He laughed quietly, pulling me backward against his plastron. "I started running again about a week ago," he informed me. "And lifting weights."

I smiled. That was a step in the right direction. "I'm impressed," I grinned.

"Actually, it's kinda depressing," he mumbled. "I used to be able to do ten miles easy. Now I can't even go one without getting a stitch in my side."

I took both of his hands and guided them around my waist. He took the hint and held me tightly. "You'll get back there, Mike," I assured him. "I guarantee it."

I leaned back against him, my head on his shoulder. Suddenly, without warning, he jabbed his fingers into my sides. I cried out, instinctively trying to pull away. But his arms were crossed over my stomach. I was trapped.

"Ack! Mikey! Quit it! You're gonna make me fall!"

I lost my balance in my struggle to find a less vulnerable position. He pulled me back, but almost overcompensated. He gripped the tree to keep from falling. Once we were steadied again, I turned and shoved him back against the trunk. "You're gonna get us both killed, you know that?"

He raised his hand, curling his fingers like claws, and began advancing slowly, humming the theme from "Jaws". I turned as quickly and carefully as I could, holding my hands out in front of me defensively. "No," I warned, wishing I could stop laughing. "Mikey? No." He didn't stop. "Come on, please? Don't…"

His hand shot out and I shrieked as I tried unsuccessfully to grab his wrists. I laughed loudly, unable to control it. "Miiiikey," I whined, still giggling. "Knock it off! Come on! I'm…"

Suddenly, he was kissing me. My eyes widened in shock and I almost pulled away from him reflexively as my whole body tensed. Oh my god! Where did _this _come from? I was _totally _unprepared for the rush of emotions and confused thoughts that washed over me. My first thought was that this was wrong. Yukio would shoot him if he knew of this. But he didn't know. It didn't matter. Yes, it did matter. It was wrong for me to like him in the first place, but it was even _worse _to give into that. He was a different _species_, for crying out loud. And I knew I'd better pull away from him now before I started to _really _like this.

But I couldn't. I'd already waited too long. I felt myself melting into him as he licked my lips, probing for entrance. I could feel my defenses slowly slipping away. Why did it matter what he looked like? Why did that bother me? It didn't bother Jessica. I paused in my train of thought. I'd never considered that before. It had never occurred to me that I wasn't the first one to fall for one of them. Fall for him. I _was _falling for him, even if I didn't want to admit it. I was falling faster than I could stop myself. And maybe it _was _okay… Jess sure seemed happy enough.

I draped my arms over his shoulders as I opened to him. He pulled me close, the rough bark of the tree scraping my legs below my shorts. His arms circled my waist and he held me as our tongues met. He was hesitant, cautious. I was still recovering from the shock. He hadn't given me any warning that he thought of me this way. I hadn't had time to sort through all these emotions with any kind of seriousness. Sure, I had thought of him. But I chalked up my fantasies to another teenage crush, like every other "love of my life" that never seemed to evolve into anything. I had never expected this.

Our lips parted slowly, but we remained close for a few seconds. I felt a rush of cool air as he breathed in deep. His hold on me released and his eyes opened slowly. I felt a tension wash over him and he swallowed hard. "I…" he started. He pulled away, a look of horror on his face. My suspicion was confirmed. He'd surprised _himself_ as much as me. "I'm sorry."

For a moment, I panicked. He was going to pull away again, and get quiet and depressed over this. I did _not _want that. "No," I cried, perhaps a little more eagerly than I meant to. I raised a hand to the side of his face, drawing his darting eyes back to mine. "No, don't be sorry."

He studied me carefully. I smiled, running my hand down to his neck. "It's okay," I whispered. "It's…" Cautiously, I leaned into him again and kissed his lips lightly. He didn't move. "It's good," I assured him. "I like it."

His eyes lit up. "Really?"

I smiled and nodded. He relaxed, but continued to search me as if he didn't totally believe my words. Finally, a faint smile crossed his lips. "Well, um," he mumbled. "I kinda liked it too." The smile abruptly fell. "I don't know if anyone else is going to like it, though."

I traced the edge of his mask. I'd already thought long and hard about that. "Does that bother you?" I asked him.

He considered that for a moment. "No."

I grinned. "Me neither."

His arms slipped around my waist as we kissed again.

****

MICHAELANGELO:

We were driving again by ten, and we reached the house by noon. I knew I wasn't a very good liar, and I tried to avoid eye contact with everyone. Especially Rei. But it was hard. Part of me was terrified by how fast this was moving. Part of me wanted to make it go faster. 

The house had five bedrooms and a loft, which was like another room, a family room over the garage, _three_ bathrooms, living room, dining room, and a kitchen. Sliding glass doors looked out onto the beach, and the living room was filled with tan leather furniture. The staircase leading upstairs was behind the sofa, and the banister was held up by thin, clear pillars that caught the light and separated it into a rainbow of colors. "My god," I whispered as I stepped inside.

Jess showed us around, and we figured out where we were going to sleep. One of the rooms was downstairs, and Splinter would stay there. Leo would sleep in the loft. Rei and Yukio offered to share a room. Well, it wasn't really an offer. It was a decision made by Yukio. Rei didn't protest.

They all talked. I retreated. I pried the window open in my room and stared out at the beach. The hiss of the waves was a totally unfamiliar sound, but certainly not an unpleasant one. It was sort of calming.

"Whaddaya doin'?"

I spun and saw Rei in the doorway. I smiled at her. "Shouldn't you be downstairs discussing the future of our happy crew?" I sighed, only mildly sarcastic.

She laughed quietly. "Shouldn't _you_?"

"Probably."

"But you're not."

"No, I'm not."

She took a few steps toward me and I felt her arms circle my shoulders as she spun in front of me and pressed her lips to mine. Instinctively, I slipped my arms around her waist as I kissed her back, slow and deep. Her fingers ran lightly over my neck, silently urging me to continue. With one final, slow breath in, I pulled away. She stared up at me, her eyes dancing. I brushed her hair out of her eyes and behind her ear. "You're so beautiful."

She leaned into me, resting her head on my shoulder, and kissed my neck. "I love you."


	9. Chapter Nine

****

CHAPTER 9

I want to say that I am in NO way, shape, or form trying to make a point about law enforcement, specifically the NYPD, in this chapter. This is in no way based on fact or suspicion and I don't want to give the impression that it is. I think the cops in our country kick ass... and we'd be lost without them. ;) They have my respect, totally and completely.

****

REI:

I saw the still figure lying on the sand, and for a moment, I was worried. So worried, in fact, that I went downstairs and out the sliding glass doors. A cool breeze met me, and I crossed my arms over my chest and shivered. 

He had headphones on, I saw as I approached. Music was still playing through them, so he couldn't have been here for long. I sank to my knees and touched his shoulder, not wanting to startle him if he was awake. He didn't move.

I glanced over my shoulder, making sure no one was watching me from a window. Yes, I was paranoid. I had dealt with my brother's overprotective lecturing for long enough to know what would set him off. This was definately one of those things. Not that I was doing anything really wrong. But the fact that I was out of bed at one in the morning would alarm him.

I lay down on the sand, on my stomach, and rested my head on my forearms. It was the same position that Michaelangelo had assumed, a few inches away from me. I studied him for a moment, and then closed my eyes. After a few moments, the faint, robotic-sounding music faded. Then, without warning, he bolted upright. My eyes flew open. "{It's okay, Michaelangelo,}" I assured him. "{Don't panic, it's only me.}"

"{What do you want?}" he demanded roughly. For a moment, I was caught off guard.

I turned onto my back. I was already sore, and craning my neck like this wasn't helping. "{I don't want anything, Mike. I just... saw you out here and I wanted to check and see if you were okay.}"

He studied me for a moment, and relaxed. "{I'm fine,}" he finally informed me. His voice held a softer tone, but he didn't move.

I smiled. "{I can see that.}"

For a moment, it was quiet. I cringed as I rubbed the tense muscles in my shoulder. I wasn't trying to tell him anything, but he noticed it. "Sore?" he asked, reverting to English. He seemed more comfortable with that language.

"A little," I admitted.

I opened my eyes and looked at him. "Turn around," he ordered.

"What?"

"On your stomach."

I studied him for a moment. He said nothing; his face was expressionless. Slowly, I turned onto my stomach. The sand underneath us shifted as he moved toward me. I felt his icy cold fingers touch my skin and jerked. He laughed quietly. "Heh. Sorry 'bout that."

Even though his fingers were like ice, his palms were warm. He massaged at my shoulders, around the spaghetti strap top, gently at first and then harder. I moaned quietly.

"Too hard?"

"No, it feels good," I murmured back.

He dug his thumbs into the muscle between my shoulder blades and moved up slowly, to the base of my skull. I smiled. "You're pretty good at this."

He didn't answer for a long time. "I used to... do this for a friend of mine."

I could sense more than hear the warning tone. He was defensive. He must have been dreaming. I wasn't sure I wanted to know what about.

****

MICHAELANGELO:

"Why don't you train like your brothers do?"

I considered that for a moment, eyes closed. We were still on the beach, and we'd been here for almost an hour now. Well, I'd probably been here a lot longer than that. But I'd been asleep an hour ago. "I dunno," I admitted into my arm. "I used to."

"Why did you stop?"

It wasn't really the first time I'd been faced with the question. I'd been asking myself for months. Not to mention trying to hold back my brothers. Especially Leo. His training was so much a part of him, I didn't think he could _live _without it. But I was different. It was so much more to me now than it had ever been before. It wasn't just staying in shape and being part of the group anymore. 

"I just... didn't see any point to it anymore," I lied, trying to hold back the memories that were rushing back. There was a reason. So much bigger than I cared to admit.

"Why?"

The memories came stronger, and I shuddered.

_I hold him to the wall by his shoulders. I can feel the rage boil inside of me. "You killed her," I growl._

He stared at me with a cold defiance. "What the hell do you care, freak?"

In one quick move, faster than he can even think to react, his neck snaps and I throw him to the floor, grabbing my nunchucks as I spin to face the room full of advancing thugs. They're all dead. Every one of them. They just haven't realized it yet. 

I opened my eyes and stared at Rei. "People change," I whispered, trying to answer her question with as little emotion as possible. Scattered memories were flooding to my mind. They had no order in particular that they belonged in. Any word, any thought, could lead to a painful scene. I squeezed my eyes closed and tried desperately to make it stop.

"Yeah, but... to change something that's so much a part of you? Why would you even _want _to do that?"

_I feel a slight buzz, a burning anger... a confusion. I kneel next to the bleeding, lifeless body, and realize that it's a child. How old is he? He can't be more than fifteen. I feel for a pulse, but he's gone. Hands shaking, I drop my weapons on the alley floor. I cry, tears mingling with his blood. It shouldn't be like this. It should've been me..._

"It was a lot of things," I whispered. "One night everything just kind of... came apart. And I spent a few weeks trying to put the pieces back together, but it just got worse. So I gave up."

She shifted and turned on her side, her arm holding her head up. "And it was because of the martial arts?"

I considered that for a moment and shook my head slightly. "Knowledge alone can't make you do something wrong."

She was quiet. "Something violent?" she finally asked.

_I drop to my knees, blood dripping from my weapons. An expression of horror is frozen on her face, a pillowcase still wrapped around her neck. "No!" I sob, feeling no pulse in her wrist. "Oh, god, no! Don't do this! This can't be happening!"_

It's a dream. It has to be. I need to wake up. Why can't I wake up! I pull her hand to my face. It's already growing cold. "Don't leave me!" I beg. "Please!" 

"Yes," I choked, squeezing my eyes closed. "Violent."

She ran her fingers lightly over my upper arm. "What did you do?" she questioned.

Tears burned as they fell from my eyes. "It was more... who I was than what I did," I whispered.

"Why?" she asked. "Who were you?"

That I _knew _I shouldn't tell her. But something inside of me wanted to. Badly. Some hidden emotion screamed that it was way _past _time to get this off my chest. All of it. I wasn't sure that was a good idea. "I was..." I hesitated. 

_"How could you _do_ that Mike! How the hell could you turn your back on her like that! Your so _fucking _irresponsible!"_

I hang my head, unable to speak, unable to defend myself. There's nothing I can say. "Raph, I don't think..."

"Shut the fuck _up, Donny! Don't you realize what he's done?"_

He spins back to me. "You have no _honor, Mike! God _damn _you!"_

"...irresponsible. And dishonorable."

She seemed shocked. "I don't believe that, Mikey."

"Believe it," I assured her.

"You know, being irresponsible doesn't necessarily make you dishonorable."

__

I see the news van from a half-mile away. "The press?" the one-shot partner sitting next to me asks cautiously. "I don't think it's wise to..."

"Hey, no sweat, dude," I grin. "She's a friend."

I lean out the window as we pull up right beside her. "Yo April, lookin' for a lift?"

She turns and smiles brightly. "Michaelangelo? What are you _doing here?"_

"It does when people die," I whispered quietly.

She was quiet for a moment. "People like who?"

If my voice dropped any lower, I knew she wouldn't be able to hear me. "People who trust you," I breathed, cringing at the honesty of the words. 

__

"I don't know who you are, but you're going _to be on the eleven o'clock news!"_

"No, you _are... Under late breaking flashes!"_

He shoots at her, thin beams of energy exploding at her feet. She jumps back, instinctively trying to shield the camera. I can feel my blood boil as he takes aim again. In a flash, I have my grappling hook. "Hey zap-dude, how come you pick on defenseless dudettes?" I yell at him, attracting his attention. 

It gives her a chance to get away. But she doesn't get far enough. I throw the line toward him, but he deflects it with another beam of energy. Before I can attack, he's shooting at her again. This time, he hits the metal tower behind her. She screams and runs a few steps, but as she realizes that the tower is crumbling on top of her, she stands frozen in place, staring at it. 

"April, look out!" 

I run at her, catching her waist and tumbling head over heels as the tower crashes loudly to the ground. "You okay?" I ask as I push myself up with my arms.

"I think so," she slurs, holding her head. "Thanks, Mikey."

"Just chill out and don't move."

"People that place their lives in your hands," I whispered. "And you turn your back on them, and allow them to be killed."

A concerned look crossed her face. "You can't save everyone, Mikey. You should know that."

I looked away, feeling the familiar stinging at the backs of my eyes. "I could've saved her. If I hadn't left, I could've saved her."

Suddenly, I realized how close I was to totally breaking down. Part of me was horrified, that I'd allowed this conversation to get so far. But at the same time, the need for release was becoming unbearable. This pain, this anger, had become a part of me over these past few months. And I didn't want it there. I didn't want to feel this way anymore. 

I could remember a time when I _didn't _live with pain. A time when I didn't realize it could exist. Even through tragedy, and _threat _of tragedy, we'd always had each other. But I was so alone right now, I was amazed that I had survived this long. My world was shattered, every hope and dream, and the fragments of my once-lived life were kicked carelessly to the side, in an effort to get them out of sight. Because they were memories. They reminded me, and they reminded those around me. They stirred hate and anger, bitter failure and the resulting loss.

They reminded me of her...

_The woman stands back as we look over the pile of thugs. "Wow, weird lookin' dudes," I observe._

"Yeah and they dress funny too," Raph smirks.

She finds her voice as the shock of being jumped wears off. "I don't know who you are... but thanks." 

We step into the light and she gasps, taking a small step back. "You're... you're not human!"

Raphael grins as he replaces his weapons. "Bingo," he mumbles. "Wow, we're dealin' with a real mind here."

"You're... you're turtles!"

I shove my nunchucks back into their place on my belt. "Yep," Donatello answers. "So we are."

She suddenly seems unsteady on her feet. "I can't handle this..."

She collapses to the ground. We all stare at each other for a moment. I kneel next to her and study her face a little more closely. "Aw, she's no fun," I mumble, slightly disappointed. "She fainted."

"You know," Don starts hesitantly. "There's something strangely familiar about her. Like I've seen her somewhere."

I brush her red hair out of her closed eyes and smile. She's pretty.

I shook my head, forcing the memory aside. It was different now. Everything was different. When I saw her face in my dreams, it was cold and lifeless, smeared with blood and agonizing pain. My insides clenched. Hot tears burned my cheeks. And for the thousandth time in the past four months, one-hundred-twenty-eight horrific days, I wished I was dead. It should've been me. I had no right to be alive.

"She was a friend wasn't she."

It wasn't a question. I wondered how much Rei already knew. I hoped she knew nothing. I _prayed _she hadn't heard it already, from somewhere else. The real story. The _true_ story. _God, take me now..._

"Three months ago," I whispered, choking on the words. "It made big news..."

_"Police are not commenting on allegations that the department could be connected to a New York City murder. An anonymous caller phoned 9-1-1 from _inside _April O'Neil's apartment last night. When police arrived, they found her strangled to death. Seven men were also found dead in the apartment. While the cause of death has not officially been determined, investigators say many of them may have died from blunt trauma. O'Neil's neighbors say the murder is a strange coincidence after a recent story by the former Channel 6 news reporter, exposing ties between the police department and a large Manhattan gang known as the Ryders..." _

"April O'Neil was killed. You remember that?"

"I was in Japan three months ago, Mikey," Rei whispered. 

I cringed. "It... It even made CNN," I struggled. "She had just done a report on... this gang. And they..." I breathed deep, trying to get a grip. I wasn't sure how much sense this was going to make. It was all one long nightmare in my mind. "The police didn't want her doing the report. It was... a really big story. This gang had all these police connections and they obviously didn't want everyone to know that. Bad for image, you know?"

She said nothing, but I felt her hand rest lightly on my arm. "She went public with it anyways. And it was a _big _story. It was that one break she'd always been looking for. But it backfired on her big time because the gang... started threatening her. And the police wouldn't do anything about it."

_"They're looking into it," she relays sarcastically. "That's all they say. It's like they don't even care that my _life _is being threatened."_

"Judging by the fact that you exposed them as being incredibly corrupt, that doesn't surprise me," Don informs.

April is close to tears. "I need your help, guys."

I leave the room and head for the kitchen. I can hear Leo promise our help as I open the fridge and grab a can of Mountain Dew. I know she's being dramatic. And even if she isn't... we can handle it. No sweat. No need to worry.

"She stayed with us for about a month. It just about drove her crazy." I couldn't help but smile through the tears as I remembered her frustration at having to live with four teenage guys. "So finally she couldn't take anymore and she went back up. And we figured... if her apartment hadn't been touched and everything... we weren't sure they knew where she lived. But we decided that the first few nights would be the most dangerous. When she went back to work and all. She'd been offered a job with the network. So that's where she went. And we watched her and there was no sign of anything wrong for about two weeks. So we figured she was okay and told her to call if she noticed anything weird."

I wiped my eyes with the back of my hand. Rei was listening silently, gently massaging my shoulder. I swallowed hard. Why was I telling her this? I hadn't told anyone all of this before... though that was probably because everyone in my life already knew.

"I was the only one home when she called," I whispered. "She told me she was hearing things; she was afraid. So I went up, and looked around just to make her feel better. There was nothing. Didn't look like anyone'd been there. So I went into her apartment."

_"There's no one here, April."_

"Mikey, I'm not _crazy!"_

"Hey, chill babe!" I laugh, holding up my hands in protest. "I didn't say you were crazy. I just said whoever or whatever you saw, it ain't here now."

She's pacing. "Mike, I'm scared."

I study her for a minute, and sigh. "You want me to stay with you tonight?" I offer.

Her tired eyes meet mine. "Would you?"

I smile. "'Course. Just point me in the direction of your phone so I can let everyone know where I'm at."

"I told her I'd stay, and I called back here to let my brothers know where I was. Talked to Raphael; he wanted to know if he needed to come up. I told him no, that I was fine. It didn't look like it was anything, but if it was, I could handle it. Real cocky son of a bitch, you know? I just didn't think anything was gonna happen. That's what it all came down to. I never took anything seriously, and this was no different. If I'd thought there was a threat, I would've asked him to come up. But I had no idea..."

_She's asleep. On the couch, for that matter. I don't want to turn on the TV or I'll wake her. I don't want to wake her up. When she doesn't get enough sleep, she gets jumpy. That's probably the only reason I'm here in the first place. _

I stand and walk to the fridge. There's nothing to eat except... hmm... what's that? Yuck. Leftover surprise. I'll pass. I close the door. I could order a pizza. And I could have it delivered, too. I glanced over at April. Except I'd have to wake her up for that. I couldn't very well answer her door and pay the guy. I sigh and walk to the balcony, opening the doors. I look around again, for any signs of danger. It's still and dark. Down on the street, cars are passing a pizza shop. Vinny's. They know me there. If I go to the back door, I don't need a disguise. I glance at the clock. It's almost ten. I could be down there and back in five minutes...

"I left her there," I choked. "I left her, knowing that she could be in danger. It just... danger didn't really _mean _anything to me then. I'd never thought about... death or pain or... what danger really _was_."

"Why did you leave?" Rei whispered.

"To go get a pizza."

Pain shot through me as the words escaped my lips. I'd sacrificed her life... for a goddamn pizza. "And when I came back she… she was dead."

__

I freeze, feeling as if my blood has suddenly turned to ice. It takes less than a second for me to take in the scene. She's on the couch, and one look tells me everything. I struggle for air, and feel like I'm going to be sick. The men turn to me, and produce knives. Instinct screams at me to reach for my weapons, but I can't move. My hands are shaking.

"She'd been… raped and strangled. I didn't even think I was… gone that long."

I couldn't stop the tears. I broke, sobbing into the space between the ground and my arms. "They wrote on the goddamn _walls_," I sobbed, "with her blood. They wrote her report, word for word."

"Oh, god, Mike."

I wanted to curl up and die. But what then? What good would that do? I'd feel this pain forever, whether I was alive or dead. "And I panicked," I gasped. "Because I knew what I'd done. And I lied about it and made it even worse when they found out a few days later."

_His cold, determined look warns me of the words to come. "You turned your back on her," he whispers harshly. "She needed you, and you left her there."_

I look away. "Leonardo please..."

I'm begging. I don't quite understand what I'm asking for. He can't take the pain away even if he wanted _to. "I want you to leave."_

"They disowned me," I whispered. "Literally. I'm not a part of this family anymore. I... tried to leave but... where the hell was I gonna go? The only friend I had outside of my brothers was... dead."

_Staring down at the ice-cold knife. Running it lightly over the inside of my wrist. Do I really want to do this? It doesn't matter. I deserve it. I don't deserve to live. And I have nowhere to go. I press a little harder, and draw blood. I hardly feel the pain. "Michaelangelo."_

I look up. My grip on the dagger tightens. I could end it. One slice, and it would be over. No more pain. No more of this torment. But his look stops me. "Michaelangelo, come home."

"I have no home."

Tears stream from my eyes. I can feel the blood trickle slowly down my arm. "Come home, my son."

"I'm not your fucking _son!" I scream. Unbridled fury guides my hand and the dagger is hurled at him. He catches it effortlessly. I collapse on the cold floor of our former lair, the home I grew up in. Shaking, crying, I feel his hand rest on my head. "_Now_, come home," he whispers softly._

"I just wanted to die. But Splinter stopped me. Then he told everyone and they all started trying to act nice. But it was so fake, you know? I knew they didn't really mean it. They hated me. They still do."

The words faded into nothingness, and I buried my face in my arms, crying silently. After a long silence, Rei finally spoke. "I don't believe that."

I sighed as I sat up, wiping my eyes with the heel of my palm. "Rei, why would I lie to you?"

"No, I mean I don't believe that your brothers hate you. You're wrong."

I shook my head. "Don't, Rei. I don't need a pep talk."

She placed her hand on my shoulder and turned my face to her. "Mike, I'm serious!" she cried. "How could you think that?"

"It's easy, Rei," I assured her. "You don't know what kind of an impact her death had on us." I dropped my head and stared down at the sand. "Her murder," I corrected quietly.

"Michaelangelo, _you _did not murder her," Rei informed me. "Has that ever occurred to you?"

I stared at her, wiping my eyes again to clear my vision. "Rei, you don't understand."

"I _do _understand," she protested. "I understand that you've been letting guilt _destroy _you for _months_ and it's something you didn't even..."

"I _should _have been there, Rei!" I yelled standing up. The pain in my chest was like fire, and getting far too hot for my comfort. I wanted to get out of here. I _needed _to get away from this. She didn't even realize what she was doing to me, but she was going to kill me. "They would _not _have been able to kill her if I'd been there!"

She stood in front of me and placed both hands on my cheeks, stopping me from running away. Without warning, she kissed me, holding me to her and preventing my escape. I felt the angry fire die, and sadness flooded through me again. The mix of emotions was becoming too much to bear. 

She pulled away slowly. I could feel the saline tears streaming down my face again. She brushed them away with her thumbs. "Please, Rei," I begged, though I wasn't entirely sure what I was asking for.

She called me on it. "Please what?" she whispered. "What can I do? You know I'll do anything I can."

The sadness overwhelmed me and I felt as if I were going to collapse. I threw my arms around her and buried my face in her hair. "Make it stop," I sobbed, even though I knew she couldn't. "Oh, god, make this nightmare stop."


	10. Chapter Ten

****

CHAPTER 10

Oh, btw, quotes/scenes you may have recognized from the last chapter came from 2 cartoon episodes- "Heroes in a Half Shell" and "Michaelangelo Meets Bugman". Quotes in this chapter (and some in the next chapter too, I think) are from Romeo & Juliet and may not be exactly right. I actually COULD NOT FIND a copy of the play, so all this is from memory. If I forgot a line without noticing it, I apologize. LOL You'll just have to forgive me.

LEONARDO:

She stood at the end of the couch, and faced me. But she said nothing. I glanced up. "You alright, Rei?" I questioned. "Need something?"

A hardened look crossed her face. "I talked to Michaelangelo last night."

I set the book down, immediately sensing the seriousness in her tone. "About what?"

"About April."

My stomach tightened. For a moment, I was speechless. I hadn't heard that name in months. But I guess I wasn't surprised that it still hurt to think about her. We'd never talked about it, after the initial reaction to news of her death. And yes, I knew that had been the turning point in Michaelangelo. But it was still entirely too difficult to talk about. Besides that, I didn't know what I could possibly say to him about it. None of us did, so we'd avoided talking about it. 

Rei waited patiently. "That surprises me," I finally managed.

"You don't believe me?" she challenged.

"No, I didn't say that," I answered. "I just said it surprises me."

Her arms crossed over her chest. "And are you still going to tell me you don't know what's wrong with him?"

Her tone was accusative. I sat up and put my feet on the floor. "I never said I didn't know what's wrong with him, Rei. I said I didn't know why he was refusing to deal with whatever it was."

"Deal with it how?" she shot. "How's he supposed to deal with it when he has _no one _to go to?"

I shook my head. "You can't say that, Rei, you don't know my brother."

"I know you turned your back on him when he needed you to..."

"No," I protested, cutting her off. I stood to my feet, feeling anger boil inside of me. She had no right to accuse me like that. I loved my brother, and she had no right to say that I didn't. "I did _not _turn my back on him. I don't know what would give you that impression but I would never..."

"You _disowned_ him, Leo?" she interrupted, her voice ringing with disbelief. 

I stared at her, momentarily stunned. "What?"

"That's what he said," she shot. "Is it not what he meant?"

Her sarcasm could've rivaled Raphael's. I stared at her, trying to figure out what she was talking about. "Rei what are you...?"

"I don't know, Leo, you tell me," she snapped, cutting me off.

I turned away from her, my mind racing through painful memories. Why would he say that? Why would he even think it? My mind raced through painful memories, and suddenly I knew what he meant. I leaned forward and buried my face in my hands. "Oh, god," I whispered. "He really thinks that, doesn't he? He really thinks I meant that."

"What _else _could you mean by it?" she demanded coldly.

I stared at her. She wasn't the one I needed to be talking to. "Where is he?" I questioned.

She studied me for a moment. "I think he's in his room."

I didn't hesitate. I got up and walked up the stairs, then knocked on his door. "Mike, you there?"

He didn't answer for a long time. Then the door opened. "Something wrong?" he asked.

"Yeah, Mike, we need to talk."

He opened the door wider, and stepped back. "About what?"

I considered the millions of ways I could go about this, and decided not to beat around the bush. "About April," I sighed.

He tensed noticeably, as if he were preparing for a verbal attack. Then he glared at me. "Rei talked to you, didn't she?" he demanded coldly.

I sighed. "Mike, this isn't about Rei," I informed him. "This is about me and I'm sorry."

He stared back, a blank look on his face. I looked away. "I remember what I said," I mumbled. "Telling you to leave." I glanced up. "But you gotta understand, Mike. Sometimes we do things and say things we don't mean because we…"

"Save it, Leo," he interrupted. "I don't need this speech."

I watched him for a moment. "It's not a…"

"Leo," he cut me off. Our eyes met and he sighed. "Just don't. I know, okay? You didn't mean it, you were just pissed."

"Yeah, you know it, but do you believe it?" I challenged.

He stared down at the floor. "I don't know, Leo. There's so many things I don't know right now, I…"

"Mike, look at me," I ordered. Reluctantly, he raised his eyes, and I rested a hand on his shoulder. "But you've always been a part of this family, and you always will be regardless of what you do. Got that?"

"Yeah, Leo," he mumbled. The tone of his voice warned me that he was just trying to get me to leave. But I hoped that at the same time, he knew how serious I was.

****

MICHAELANGELO:

"Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much, Which mannerly devotion shows in this, For saints have hands that pilgrims hands do touch, and palm to palm is holy palmer's kiss."

I reached my arm back and threw a flat stone into the calm water, watching it skip over the glossy surface. "Have not saints lips?" I replied, lost in thought about other things. "And holy palmers too?"

"Ay pilgrim, lips that they must use in prayer."

I glanced over at Rei and she smiled, waiting for the next line. But I didn't remember it. It had been a long time since I'd rehearsed Shakespeare, and never with anyone else. She glanced back up at the house, to make sure no one was watching, then raised her hand to the side of my face, her soft eyes dancing. "Oh then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do..." she cued. And I remembered.

"They pray," I continued. "Grant thou lest faith turn to despair."

She brushed her thumb back and forth over my cheek, studying me. "Saints do not move though grant for prayer's sake," she mumbled.

Again, I looked to see if we were being watched. The house was still, and the shades were drawn. It was still pretty early, though well after sunrise, and I figured everyone was probably still in bed. Except, of course, for Leo. And he was out running along the nature trail. He wouldn't be back for quite a while. "Then move not by my prayer's effect I take," I whispered, turning my attention back to Rei. "Thus from my lips by thine my sin is purged."

I came close and kissed, our tongues touching hesitantly. She pulled away slowly, but sooner than I would've liked. Still close, she held my head close to hers. "Then have my lips the sin that they have took?" she breathed. Her lips brushed mine as she spoke.

"Sin from my lips?" I whispered back, burying my fingers in her hair. "Trespass sweetly urged give me my sin again."

I forgot what I had been thinking as we kissed deeply. She rose to her knees as our tongues played over each other, and towered over me. My hands moved themselves down her sides, acting of their own accord. The feel of her soft skin tingled against my palms. The light blue and green string bikini top hid very little from my exploration. I reached the top of her jean shorts and stopped, resting my hands on her hips.

She put her arms on my shoulders and pushed me down, onto my back. I didn't resist her, and lay down in the sand. She followed me, our lips still locked together, her hands on my shoulders. When she broke the kiss, she moved down to my neck, licking and sucking gently at my skin. I felt the excitement growing between my legs, but forced it into submission. 

"We're gonna get caught, Rei," I sighed. I knew what would happen if her brother looked out the window and saw this.

She pulled away slowly and sat up, sighing deeply. "I know," I sympathized. Every part of me felt that same sigh. I rose next to her and took her hand. "Later, huh?" I grinned at her.

"Later _what_?" she teased, smiling back.

"Later you can do anything you want to me," I informed her. My body tingled with the exhilaration of the idea. 

She laughed and shoved me playfully. "Who says I _want _to do anything to you?" she smirked.

I caught myself on my arms and resisted the urge to retaliate. If we ended up rolling around and wrestling on the sand, we _would _get caught. I glanced over my shoulder again to make sure we were still alone, and looked out over the water. There was a barge in the distance, halfway between us and Canada. I sighed as I leaned forward, my elbows on my knees, and tried not to think about anything at all.

****

RAPHAEL:

I know they didn't see me. If they did, there was no way in hell they would've been fooling around like that. I wasn't surprised. In fact, it was kind of a relief to know that I was right. I watched them talk, keeping their hands to themselves. They were afraid of getting caught. And with damn good reason. Yukio would probably try to kill them both.

My thoughts came to rest there, and I felt bitter frustration seep into my thoughts. The way he treated Rei irritated me. But the way he spoke of my brother, and _me_ for that matter, royally pissed me off. I hoped that when they _did _get caught, Mike would stand up for himself. It was gonna happen eventually. And I could only pray I was there if Yukio got violent.

Rei stood and walked away, leaving Michaelangelo on the beach. She approached me unsuspecting that I was even there. Her hands were buried deep in her pockets and a slight smirk was on her lips.

"Hello, Rei."

She jumped, startled. "Omigod! Raphael! I didn't see you!"

I smiled. "That was the idea."

Her eyes darted back to Michaelangelo, then to me. A panicked look was on her face. I decided not to say anything about what I'd seen. It would only freak her out. And I had no intentions of using it against them. "You okay?" I asked. She nodded quickly. "There's coffee in there." Her eyes darted reflexively to the mug in front of me. 

"Why, uh, are you hiding?" she finally stammered.

I smiled. "What makes you think I was hiding?"

"You pulled that chair into the trees, Raph," she reminded me. "Why not at the table?"

I shrugged. "The chair was already here," I answered. That wasn't a lie. "And I'm too lazy to move it back. Besides, the shade is nice."

She considered that for a moment, and apparently decided that she believed me. I looked back at the beach, toward Michaelangelo. He lay back on the sand and stared up at the sky. "He doesn't know I'm here either, does he?" I thought out loud.

"Uh," Rei stammered. "No."

I said nothing. There wasn't much to say. After a long, somewhat uneasy silence, I sighed. "You like him, don't you."

It wasn't really a question. I knew the answer before I ever asked. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a puzzled expression on his face. "Of course I like him, Raph."

I could tell by the way she said it that she'd missed the point. "No, I mean you_ really _like him."

She caught the implication and flushed slightly. "I..."

"Mmm," I mumbled, hiding a smile behind my hand. What a surprise.

"You mean..." she struggled. "You mean would I date him?"

"Yeah," I shrugged. "Sure."

Her eyes fell. "I... I don't know."

I studied her for a few minutes. She was pretty good, acting like she'd never thought about it before. "It's okay," I assured her. "Not like I'm going to say anything to your brother."

She clenched her arms across her chest and rubbed her upper arms. She didn't say anything. She was waiting, trying to feel out my reaction. I let her sweat for a few seconds, turning my eyes toward Mike. "You know, Rei, I don't care if you and my brother are fucking with hats off; I've just got one thing to say to you." I turned and looked her straight in the eye. "You break his heart, I break your neck." She tensed, but said nothing. "And I mean that most sincerely, Rei. I don't care what you two do, but you better not tell him you love him unless you really mean it."

Her gaze turned ice cold. "You don't have to threaten me, Raphael," she glared. "I'm not like that."

I stared at her, unwavering. "Just don't screw him over, Rei," I warned. "That's all I have to say."

An indignant glare answered me, and she said nothing as she walked away. I'd pissed her off. Not that I really cared. She'd get over it. 

For a few minutes, I was alone. Michaelangelo stood and walked to the water. I debated for a minute, then stood up. I walked to the edge of the sand and stopped for a minute. It was warm and soft. A ridge of rocks separated us. I looked both ways down the beach to make sure no one was around and started toward the water's edge.

I kicked a stone as I stopped behind him and he spun around. I smiled. "Hey," I greeted.

He studied me for a minute before turning back to the smooth, calm water. "How long've you been here?" he questioned.

I shrugged. "You turned around as soon as I walked up."

"No, how long were you watching me from up by the house?"

I stared at him for a minute, surprised. "Yeah, I was... talking to Rei. Not for very long, though/"

"About me?"

I grinned. "Yeah, Mike, we have nothing better to talk about."

I left him to figure out if that was sarcasm or not. He studied me, then turned away. "Why?" he asked.

"Why what?"

"Why do you care?"

I stared at him for a minute. "About what? Her?"

He shrugged. "Her, me. Anything. Why's it your concern?"

I was a little thrown by the question. "Why wouldn't it be, Mike? You're my brother, for cryin' out loud."

He hung his head and said nothing. I let the silence continue for a minute, then sighed. "I _do _care you know," I mumbled. After a moment's hesitation, he looked up. Still, he said nothing. "And if you want the truth, I think she's good for you, Mikey."

He flinched at the name, but didn't hit back. I knew I was pushing it. A month ago, he probably would have tried to take my head off for using it. He'd rejected that name violently after that night, when he'd changed. So much about him changed, in an instant. He'd walked out of here his usual, carefree self... and walked back in at the brink of a nervous breakdown. He was like a different person. And I didn't like who he'd become. Dark, depressed... Shit, he was worse than me. I kept my problems to myself, but his ability to keep silent damn near put me to shame. In the past four months, he'd said about as much as he'd managed in four _minutes_, pre-crisis.

That's what it was. A crisis. It was as if the world had come to a screeching halt, trapping him in a state of being that was drastically different from who he really was. Now it looked like he was finally starting to come out of it. And in spite of my reservations, I knew exactly what was causing it.

"You've been more like yourself since she's been around," I continued quietly. "Like you're starting to get back to normal."

He looked up. Pain was written all over his features. "I don't want to be normal, Raphael," he whispered. "I don't want to be anything like who I was."

His words struck me. "Why? Why would you say that, Mike? I mean, we need you around here." He turned his gaze away again. "Hey, I don't know if you've realized this but things just aren't the same around here without you easing all the tension." I grinned. "I've come uncomfortably close to killing Leo twice already, and you didn't even notice."

That was meant to be a joke, but it was true, too. We needed him around. Me, especially. I wasn't about to admit it to anyone else, but I knew he balanced me out. Eventually, I _would _go off the deep end. It was already getting bad.

He looked back toward the water. "I..." he started. "I notice. I just..."

"Don't care," I finished for him. It wasn't an accusation. It was just the facts.

He sighed and shook his head as he stared down at the sand. "I just don't know anymore, Raphael."

I hesitated for a moment, then raised my hand to his shoulder. "I know," I mumbled. "I don't expect you to. Not yet. But I think..." I stopped and thought for a minute about what I was about to say. I didn't want to give him bad advice. "I think you and Rei... are good together. I see the way you act when she's around, and it's more like _you_. And whatever you do, Mike, I'll back you up."

He was silent. After a long pause, he nodded. "Thank you," he whispered, eyes closed. And for once, he didn't sound like he was on the brink of tears.


	11. Chapter Eleven

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CHAPTER 11

NC-17 version of this chapter at http://www.angelfire.com/ok5/tmnt/mourning/ch11nc.html

REI:

"What did Raph say to you?"

I hesitated for a moment. "I think the exact words were 'I don't care if you and my brother are fucking with hats off, but you better not hurt him.'"

He laughed quietly and kneaded harder at the muscles in my shoulders. My clothes were all in the wash, except for the bikini I'd borrowed from Jessica, and the jeans I was wearing over it. "He thinks that?" he questioned, sounding amused.

"I don't know," I admitted. "He obviously thinks _something _is going on." I closed my eyes as the tension eased from my body. "I think he has a problem with me, actually."

Mikey moved his hands a little lower, massaging around my shoulder blades. "Nah, I don't think so," he mumbled. "That's just the way Raph is."

"Does he have a problem with _all _women?" I laughed.

"He's been hurt a lot," he explained.

I considered that. "I got that impression." It was quiet for a few seconds. "Does he talk to you? About his relationships? Is that how you know?"

He hesitated. "He used to," he finally answered. "He told me about it the first time he got laid."

I couldn't help but laugh. "What did he say?"

He took a moment to answer. "He said it helped him to figure out... what he is."

That sounded strange. What he is, rather than _who_ he is. "Really," I acknowledged.

"Mmm. It's hard not knowing what you're here for, you know?" He ran his hands lightly over my skin. "I mean, we're not human but... I'd at least like to _think _we aren't just animals."

I frowned at that. "You're not an animal, Michaelangelo."

"I dunno, angel, your brother seems to think we are."

I sighed deeply. "You heard that, huh?"

"It wasn't just one thing, Rei," he mumbled. "It's pretty obvious how he feels."

He pulled his hands away and raised high on his knees as I turned onto my back. He was straddling my hips. "I'm not like my brother," I whispered.

He smiled faintly. "I know that."

There was a moment of silence. He crawled off of me and lay down on his side. The twin bed was barely wide enough for us to lay side-by-side. "So does that mean you don't know who you are?" I grinned at him.

"You already know that I don't, Rei," he sighed. He flashed me a mischievous smile. "But then, I haven't been laid either. That could solve the whole problem."

"That by choice?" I challenged, grinning back at him.

"Is what?"

"That you haven't been laid."

He shrugged. "I dunno. I guess so."

I hesitated for a moment. I didn't want to pry, but he didn't sound like he was annoyed. "Have you ever been in love?" I questioned.

"No."

"Never?"

He shook his head, then seemed to reconsider. "I had a crush once," he finally mumbled. He frowned at that. "Twice. But I never thought anything would come of it."

"What was her name?"

He hesitated. "Kala was one of them."

"And the other one?" I pressed, smiling.

He thought hard before he answered. "April."

Open mouth, insert foot. 

I rested my hand on his cheek. "I'm sorry."

He shrugged, not wanting to stir up the emotions. I was relieved. "She was twice my age," he explained. "Not to mention a different _species_. It wouldn't have worked."

I considered that. "Does that bother you?"

"What?"

"That you were different?"

He sighed and sat up. "It would've bothered her."

"You think so?"

He shrugged and leaned forward, bringing his knees to his chest. "Not that she was prejudice or anything. I mean, she accepted us more than anyone else ever did. It's just that..." He sighed. "It never would've worked. I never thought it would."

"Because she was human?"

"Well, it wasn't _just _that."

"Good. Because that's not a good enough reason."

He grinned. "You don't think so?" His voice sounded almost teasing. 

"Doesn't seem to bother Raph's girlfriend," I reminded him.

He shrugged and looked away, like he didn't want to talk about it. In the silence that followed, I looked around the room. The bed that Yukio slept in, on the other side of the small room, was neatly made. He was gone now, walking or jogging or doing whatever it was he did. He didn't like being kept indoors, and he wouldn't be back until he had to be. Even if he _did _come back, I wouldn't see him. The door was locked, if by some miracle he actually came up here. If he should see me talking to Michaelangelo, it would lead to a fight. Especially since I was doing it laying down, in nothing more than a bikini top and jeans.

Mike's brothers, and Jessica, were all watching TV. I could hear the sounds of a fight scene drifting through the vents. I wondered briefly why he wasn't with them.

"Do you think Raphael knows?" I asked quietly.

"What, that we're fucking with hats off?"

I shot him a pathetic look. "No, silly, you know what I mean."

He considered that for a moment. "I don't know. He might. If he does, he's not admitting it."

"How would he have found out?"

He sighed. "He was my best friend, Rei. He knows me well."

There was a moment of silence. "Does it bother you?" I finally asked.

"What?"

"That he might know about us."

He paused for a minute. "No. Does it bother you that he thinks more is going on than what actually is?"

I thought about that. "Should it?" I questioned. "I mean, is he going to start looking at me like I'm a slut or something?"

He laughed. "I doubt that."

"Good," I smiled. "Because frankly, I wouldn't mind proving his theory right."

He froze, and his eyes locked on mine. I shrugged, not wanting to intimidate him. "Just saying, you know," I informed. "Don't get all freaked out on me and go crawl into your shell somewhere."

I shoved him playfully. But he was so engrossed in thinking he didn't even bother to catch himself. He landed on the floor with a loud thud and I jumped up onto my knees. "Oh my god," I laughed. "Are you okay?"

He seemed a little confused as to how he'd ended up on the floor. I couldn't help but laugh, hiding my smile behind one hand. The other hand supported my weight as I leaned forward on the edge of the bed, staring down at the stunned turtle on the floor. He looked up and suddenly, a mischievous smile crossed his lips. Lightning quick, he reached out and grabbed my wrist. He yanked my arm and I shrieked in surprise as I tumbled head over heels and landed on top of him. I ended up on my back across his lap, and his hands quickly moved to tickle me.

"Ack! No! Stop...!" I laughed, trying to double over. "Stop it!"

Suddenly he stopped and looked toward the door, placing his finger over my lips. "What?" he called loudly.

The stairs creaked as someone started up them. I sat up, immediately concerned. "You okay?" Raph's voice came through the door. "You just fall or something?"

"Uh, no, I'm fine!" Mike yelled back. "Really, I'm okay!"

There was a pause. "What're you doing?" Raphael asked from directly outside the room. 

"Uh, nothing, just um..." Mike looked at me and smiled as he searched for something to say. "Just testing a theory."

Raph paused. "Is that the theory of how long it takes you to hit the floor when you fall out of Rei's bed?"

Mike scrambled to get up. Instinctively looking for a place to hide, I slid underneath the bed as Michaelangelo opened the door. "No, uh, just... I'm fine, see?" he assured his brother. "No scrapes, bruises, internal bleeding..."

There was a moment of silence. "What?" Mike cried, laughing. 

"Why are you in here?" Raphael's voice was more than a little suspicious. 

"I, uh, had... to borrow something from Rei. It was... uh... some notes we took, _she _took. Last... yesterday." He was a terrible liar. 

"Uh, huh," Raph mumbled. "This the same Rei who's hiding under the bed?"

Oh my god! How did he know that? But instead of panicking, I was trying not to laugh. "Under the...?" Mike stammered.

The blanket lifted, Raph looked under the bed. I smiled casually. "Hi, Raph. How are ya?"

He stared at me for a moment with a blank expression on his face, then sighed as he dropped the blanket again. "I _don't _wanna know," he mumbled.

****

RAPHAEL:

I turned the volume up on the TV at my first opportunity. They were quiet for a while. Almost fifteen minutes. Then there was a loud thud, and laughter. Don and Leo both looked up at the ceiling, and Jessica pulled away from me. For a moment, I worried that they might go to investigate. I cupped my hands over my mouth. "Hey Mikey, knock it off will ya!" I yelled up the stairs.

"What's he doing?" Leo asked, turning to me.

I shrugged. "He was reading when I went up there before."

Leo stared at me, obviously suspicious. "Must be a good book," he replied, his voice cold.

I shrugged and grinned. "He actually fell off the bed last time. I don't think he's used to the twin beds, you know?"

They seemed satisfied with that, and I was relieved. I couldn't think up a better explanation. He was gonna get busted if he kept it up. Jessica pressed to me again, resting her head on my shoulder. "Hey Raph?" she whispered, far too quiet for anyone else to hear.

"Mmm?" I mumbled.

"They're having sex in my parent's guest room, aren't they?"

"Yep."

****

REI:

We untangled ourselves from the blankets and threw them aside. I shoved him back and he nearly toppled over. "You ass," I laughed. "You're gonna get us both killed."

"Killed, huh?" he grinned. "That's a little extreme."

I raised myself onto my elbows, looking up at him as he got on his knees. "Tell it to my brother."

He opened his mouth to say something, but instead only laughed. "No, forget that."

"What?" I asked. 

He shook his head and backed away. I wasn't sure where he thought he was going. I wasn't _near _done with him yet. "Nothing," he chuckled.

"Mikey, come on!" I cried. "You can't do that! I _hate _that."

He smiled and looked away for a moment, like he was thinking. Then he looked back, still grinning. "Well, the initial thought was 'Fuck your brother,' but I'm having entirely too much fun fucking you to even think about that."

I shoved him a _lot _harder this time, and he did fall over backwards. I sprang on top of him and almost managed to get his hands pinned. But he flipped me onto my back and, before I even realized what was happening, he was gone. Jesus, where did he _go_ that fast! I bolted upright just in time to see him throw the door open. My eyes widened. "Mikey!"

He darted out of the room, leaving me gaping, and sitting in the middle of the floor, totally naked. I scrambled to grab the blankets instinctively. "Michaelangelo, I'm going to kill you."

He poked his head back in the room. "Aw, but you love me, remember?" he smiled.

I looked around for something to throw at him, but instead saw his facemask. I grabbed it and held it up. "What're your brothers going to say when you show up without this?" I taunted.

He smiled back. "What's _your _brother going to say when you show up without _this_?" he answered, holding up my top.

Instinctive panic raced through me. I _had _no other clothes right now. "Michaelangelo, that is _not _funny!" I shot, trying not to laugh. Why was I laughing? If Yukio walked up those stairs right now...

He stepped back into the room and leaned against the frame of the open door, dangling the top in front of him. "You want it?" he grinned. "Come get it."

Not giving myself a chance to think, I lunged at him. I tried to keep the blanket around me, but it was a lost cause. I caught his feet, but he got away and took off down the hall to his room, leaving me on the carpet and in plain view of anyone who happened to come up the stairs. "Michaelangelo, get over here!" I yelled loudly. He only laughed. "Raph!" I called. "Will you come beat your brother up for me _please_?"

I didn't think he'd actually do it. But the creaking stairs warned me. I scrambled to get back into my room, slamming the door shut.

****

LEONARDO:

Michaelangelo was sitting on his bed, a book in his lap. His mask was missing, and the blanket was pulled around his waist. "What on earth is going on up here?" I demanded.

He looked up at me, an innocent smile on his face. "Nothing," he answered. "Just reading."

"Rei wants you beat up for reading?" I challenged. "And where's your...?"

"I took it off," he interrupted. I stared at him, surprised. He laughed. "Geez, Leo, it's not like it hides anything! It's just a bandana."

I considered that for a moment. "What's with Rei?" I demanded.

"It's, uh... the book is hers."

I stared, waiting for more of an explanation. "She uh... I stole it. Sort of. I mean, she was right there. Just messin' with her, Leo. No big deal."

I eyed him suspiciously. "Michaelangelo, could you possibly refrain from messing with her? Because if Yukio comes home and..."

"Sure Leo," he smiled, cutting me off. "I'll leave her alone. Here." He slapped the book closed and handed it to me. "Why don't you go give this back to her. I'm sure she really wants to finish reading it. Tell her I'm sorry for taking it, okay?"

I took the novel from him and waited for him to say something else. The broad grin on his face warned me that I was missing something. "You wanna come downstairs and watch...?"

"No, I'm okay," he interrupted, still smiling. Something was _definitely _up with him. "Really. I'm just gonna sit here and... think. If that's okay." I studied him for a moment and he laughed. "I won't cause any more problems. I _promise._"

I sighed as I turned to the door. "Mike, are you alright?"

"Fine," he clipped. He was way too perky for his own good. I hadn't seen him like this in months, and I wasn't entirely sure what to think of it. It was kind of sudden, and I was shocked. "Never been better. Why? Something wrong?"

I studied him. "No," I answered hesitantly. "Nothing."

He shrugged, still smiling, and I left the room more than a little confused.

I knocked on Rei's door. "Who is it?" she called back.

"It's Leonardo," I answered. "Michaelangelo asked me to give this back to you."

There was a long pause. I waited for her to open the door, but she didn't. She didn't respond at all. I stood still and listened for sounds of movement, but there was nothing. "Rei?"

"Uh," she stammered through the door. It cracked open and she poked her head out. A look of horror was on her face, but it was quickly replaced with one of relief. 

I stood there, confused, and held the book out. She reached her arm around the door and snatched it away. "Thanks!" she shot, smiling. She slammed the door closed again, and I stared at it for a moment.

"Rei, is everything alright?"

"Yes!" she yelled. "Wonderful, now that I have my _book _back!"

Her voice was a lot louder than it needed to be. In the other room, I heard Michaelangelo snicker. "Hey, Leo, you're gonna miss the best part!" Raph's voice called up the stairs.

I glanced back and forth between the two rooms, not sure I should leave them alone, and finally turned away.

****

MICHAELANGELO:

"Psst! Rei!"

The door didn't open. But I knew she was right on the other side of it. I could see her shadow in the slit underneath it. "Rei-chan!"

The door opened slightly and she peeked out through the crack. "You live dangerously, Mikey," she whispered loudly.

Reassured that she wasn't angry by the slight smile on her face, I grinned back. "Yep, that's me. Danger incarnate."

She eyed me suspiciously, half-glaring, half-smiling. "I'm gonna get even with you, you know," she informed me.

"Why don't you just put one of your brother's shirts on?" I suggested, kicking my legs just slightly in the air. I was on my stomach, my weight on my elbows, arms crossed over each other.

"I thought of that," she answered. "His suitcase is locked."

"Awww," I sympathized.

She opened the door a little wider so that I could see more of her smooth, naked body. She had the blanket around her waist, but made no attempt to cover her breasts. She tilted her head slightly and pouted. It was impressive. I almost bought it. "Mikey, I'm cold."

"Well, come here," I grinned at her. "I know how to keep you warm."

She sighed deeply, her chest rising impressively. I felt excitement shoot through me. It had only been about five minutes total since I'd been inside of her... but it felt a hell of a lot longer than that. We stared at each other for a moment and I saw the desire creep into her eyes. "You're really going to make me run naked down this hall, aren't you," she realized.

I smiled. "I _dare _you," I whispered.

She did.

I wasn't really expecting it, and I hand to scramble to get up as she spun around the door and slammed it closed. "Hey, hey, hey! Quiet!" I chastised as we stood face to face. "I just told Leonardo I'd behave. We don't need any more loud noises coming from up..."

She tackled me, arms wrestling with mine in a playful fight for dominance. So much for being quiet…

****

RAPHAEL:

Leo and Don had left. Don was on the beach and Leo was talking to Splinter. That was fine by me. Jess and I were still curled on the couch, watching a second movie. I wasn't particularly interested, but there was nothing better to do.

Yukio walked in the front door. He studied the TV screen for a moment, listening to words he didn't understand, and turned away in disgust. "{Where is my sister?}" he demanded.

"{Not sure,}" I lied. "{Something wrong?}"

"{I need to speak with her.}"

I studied him for a moment. "{About what?}" I asked.

He scowled. "{That is none of your concern,}" he shot at me.

I shrugged and turned back to the TV. "{She went for a walk,}" I informed him. "{About a half-hour ago.}"

"{Where did she go?}"

I shrugged. "{I don't know. She started walking that way, though.}"

I pointed, and his eyes followed my gesture. "{She did not tell you where she was going?}"

"_Iie_," I answered with a smirk. "{Was I supposed to ask?}"

He glared at me. "{If my sister and I were in no danger, we would not be in this country right now.}"

"{So?}" I answered. "{It's not like she could've gotten far.}"

I could see the frustration building in his eyes. "{I must find my sister before anything happens to her.}"

I smiled to myself as he spun away. _Yeah, you do that, dickhead._

****

MICHAELANGELO:

I glanced at the clock. The movie was over. So were we. I was exhausted, but at the same time, I knew I could do it again. "You think we'll actually get away with this?" Rei whispered.

I breathed deep, taking in the scent of perfume mixed with sweat. "I think we already did," I sighed.

She pressed closer to me, reaching her arm across my chest. The blankets had been kicked to the foot of the bed and we were sprawled naked on the cool sheets. The door was closed and locked, but the window was open. I could hear the faint crashing of the waves on the shore as a breeze rustled the trees.

She nuzzled against my neck and I sighed. "We should split," I whispered. "Guess I oughtta go get your clothes, huh?"

"Wilt thou be gone?" she breathed back. "It is not yet near day." 

I smiled. "Rei..."

"It was the nightingale and not the lark that pierced the fearful hollow of thine ear," she murmured against my neck. "Nightly she sings on yon pomegranate tree."

"It was the lark, the herald of the morn," I sighed. "No nightingale. I must be gone and live or stay and die."

"You missed a line," she laughed quietly.

I smiled. "Sue me," I mumbled. "It's been a long time, you know."

She breathed deep and pressed close to me, running her hand down my arm. "We don't have to stop," she pleaded. "The door's locked; they can't get in even if they wanted to."

"Mmm… Let me be put to death. I am content so thou wilt have it so." She laughed at the dramatics. "I have more care to stay than will to go. Come death and welcome, Juliet wills…"

She kissed me and cut me off. I sighed as she pulled away I could hear an argument downstairs and recognized the voices. I sat up reluctantly. "Your brother's home," I mumbled. "You really have to go."

I looked back and brushed her hair out of her eyes before standing up. "I'll get your pants."

"Better be fast," she smiled back.

"Always," I assured her.

"Don't forget to get your belt and mask outta there too."

I nodded and reached for the door handle. "Hey, Mikey?"

I glanced back at her. She made no attempt to hide her body. "Yeah?" I whispered.

"I love you."

I smiled. "I love you too."

"No regrets?"

I stopped and turned fully toward her. The look on her face was pleading. I sat down again on the edge of the bed and took her hand. "Never," I assured her. "I'll never regret this."

She smiled.


	12. Chapter Twelve

****

CHAPTER 12

MICHAELANGELO:

There was a hammock in the small forest that Jessica called a front yard. That's where I was, dozing contentedly in the shade, when she found me. "Workin' hard?"

I opened one eye and flashed her a smile. "Hardly working," I corrected.

She pushed the ropes and I started swinging back and forth. I closed my eyes and smiled as I breathed in the moist, faintly sweet scent of the trees. A neighbor was cutting grass, but I couldn't see it. I could only hear the lawnmower, mixed with the ever-present waves and the hissing, rattling sound of insects calling for more heat.

The rocking slowed but started again as she climbed onto the hammock with me. "Where is everyone?" I asked cautiously as she settled next to me.

"Your brothers are on the nature trail about a mile down the beach. Mine is reading."

I turned slightly and she pressed her back against my plastron. "I don't know where Splinter is, but I doubt he'll come all the way out here."

I considered that. I wasn't so sure, but I wasn't going to worry about it. It wasn't like we were doing anything wrong, anyway. I sighed as I nestled my face in her sweet-smelling hair. It was damp and cool. "You just take a shower?"

"Mmm," she answered, taking my hand and guiding it around her waist. I slipped my fingers under her shirt and brushed her skin lightly, circling her navel. "You take one yet?"

"I jumped in the lake early this morning," I mumbled back.

She laughed quietly. "I guess that counts."

I heard wind chimes clank together as a cool north breeze swept past us. She came closer and rested her head on my arm. I could feel her warm breath on my skin.

"I love you, Mikey," she whispered.

I brushed her hair aside and kissed her neck lightly. "I love you too, Rei."

The fluttering wings of a small brown bird caught my attention. It flew right over us and perched on a branch a few feet away, cocking its head to the side as it watched us. I sighed contentedly and closed my eyes, drifting toward a blissful sleep with Rei in my arms.

***

I awoke to a tingling sensation between my legs. I breathed deep, eyes closed, and smiled. "That feels good, Rei."

She didn't answer and I opened my eyes. She was sitting on my legs, balancing carefully in the unsteady swing and smiling down on me as she ran her fingers up and down my shaft. I closed my eyes and soaked in the excitement. "That feels _really _good."

"You know, I think I like your body, Michaelangelo," she informed me, squeezing gently. "It's easily accessible."

I laughed quietly. "What's that supposed to mean?"

She smiled as she relaxed her hold, then tightened it again. Her other hand came closer to my body and cupped me gently. "That I don't have to have your permission to touch you," she grinned. "In fact, you don't even have to wake up until it's too late."

I smiled back at her. "Too late, huh?"

"Mmm hmm."

I felt heat rush through my thighs as she continued, squeezing and releasing at a slow, steady pace, her other hand massaging in the same rhythm. She was pulling too, milking me. I moaned. "Mmm, you better stop, baby."

"Why?"

"'Cause this feels a little _too _good," I whispered. "I don't know if I can pull back if somebody comes."

She stopped for a moment and I opened my eyes to see her looking around. "There's nobody here, Mikey," she assured me.

"Yeah, but..."

She pulled her warm hands away and touched her finger to my lips. "Shh," she hissed. "Just trust me."

I swallowed hard as she began again. I wasn't worried about someone seeing what she was doing to me. We'd have plenty of warning if anyone came near us. We could see the door to the house from here if someone came out, and the ground was lined with small sticks and leaves. Not that my brothers couldn't make their way through that without making a sound, because I knew they could. But they'd have to really make an effort. And I couldn't think of any good reason why they'd bother. Being caught unaware wasn't really what I was worried about.

I took Rei's hand away from my lips. "I'm just saying, angel, if someone comes I might not be able to hide it even if I know they're coming."

She smiled. "Hmm. That _is _a problem."

She was still massaging, and I could feel the excitement growing. I groaned and reached for her wrist. "Come on, Rei, I'm serious," I pleaded.

She laughed quietly and her other hand roamed down. I grabbed that one, too. "What do you think you're going to do?" she demanded, smiling. "You think you can stop me from turning you on?"

"I can try."

She grinned. "I can make you horny just by talking to you, Mikey, and you know it."

I groaned. "Yes, you probably could," I agreed. "But please don't. Don't torture me like that."

She brought our hands up and kissed my fingers. "Would it feel better if I took you all the way?" she invited seductively.

****

RAPHAEL:

Jessica cooked, and we all ate. She wanted a meal where all of us were sitting at the table. Don't ask me why, it was just her thing. Nobody had any objections, since she was an excellent cook. Mike and Rei were missing, and Leo offered to go track them down. Luckily, they walked in the door just as he was getting ready to go searching. Neither one of them said a word, just sat down at the table and smiled at each other. One look at Mike's face told me all I needed to know.

Throughout dinner, they watched each other, trying to be discreet about it. Every time their eyes met, they smiled. Eyes darted around the room, checking to see if anyone was suspicious. It took a few minutes, but eventually, I caught his stare. I questioned him silently and he shrugged slightly and shot me a smile. I rolled my eyes, but smiled knowingly. It was about damn time.

"Right, Raph?"

I jerked to attention and looked toward Jessica. She raised her eyebrows, prodding me to answer. "Uh, yeah," I answered, totally oblivious to the question. "Right."

Donny snickered. Jess sighed. "I rest my case," she sighed.

I'd missed something. I wasn't entirely sure I wanted to know what. "Agreed," Leo smiled.

"What's agreed?" I asked.

"That you don't listen when I'm talking to you," Jess smirked.

I glared at her for a moment, and Mike stood up. "It was good," he praised. 

He walked to the sink, deposited his dishes, and walked outside. Just like that. Leo and I exchanged glances, and I got up. "I'll be right back."

Outside, he was already halfway down the long driveway. "Hey!" He stopped and turned around, walking backward. "Where you goin'?"

He shrugged, half skipping as he continued to back away. "I dunno," he answered. "Walk?"

I jogged toward him, and he stopped. "Somethin' wrong?" he questioned.

I watched him for a moment as I stopped a few feet away, but didn't answer. The smile fell from his face. "Raph?"

I shook my head. "No, nothing's wrong."

He seemed relieved by that. "What's up, then?"

"I just wanted to warn you," I mumbled. "You guys are gonna need to be a little quieter than that if you insist on doing it in the house."

He stared at me, shocked. "What?"

"Don't 'what' me, Mikey," I grinned at him. "You know _exactly _what I'm talking about."

He studied me for a moment, then smiled faintly. "You covered for me, didn't you?" he realized.

"Yeah, but it's not easy when you're being so damn loud. So next time you think you can keep it on the bed?"

He shrugged, and the smile grew wider. "It was a twin bed," he reminded me. "Not enough room."

I reached up to hit him playfully, but he retaliated before I had a chance to. I wasn't expecting him to go for my legs. A few months ago, I would've been aware of it, but I just didn't expect it now. I stumbled backward as my legs were kicked out from under me. He wasn't strong enough to actually drop me. I stared at him for a moment, and he grinned, daring me to hit back. I lunged at him and we grabbed each other's wrists. I'd always been stronger than him. But it was even more evident now that he hadn't worked out in three months. 

We wrestled for a few minutes before I locked his head in my arm. "Ack! Okay, okay!" he cried. "Air! Please!"

I let go and stood back as he straightened. He smiled at me and for a moment, it was like things were normal. Just the way it used to be before she died. The smile fell from my face. "Hey, Mikey?"

"Yeah?"

"I like Rei."

He grinned. "Yeah, I like her too."

"Treat her right."

His smile fell as he realized I was saying something serious. He stared at me for a moment, and nodded slightly. "I know, Raph," he whispered. "I will."

I clapped a hand on his shoulder, and turned away, walking back to the house.

****

REI:

"Psst! Rei!"

I opened my eyes slowly and stared up at the ceiling. The blankets were up around my chin, warm sunlight filtering though the window and warming my face. My body felt strange, and I as my mind awoke, I remembered why. I was still naked under the sheets, but he wasn't beside me. "Rei? You awake?"

I couldn't tell exactly where the voice was coming from. I yawned and sat up, brushing my hair back. "I am now," I mumbled. "That you, Mike?"

"Yeah. Over here."

I looked over toward the open window and saw him. I was a little startled, since I was on the second story and I couldn't see what he was sitting on. After the initial shock, I couldn't help but laugh. "Michaelangelo, what are you doing out there?"

He smiled and shrugged. "Stairs were too crowded. Know what I mean?"

I glanced at the clock. It was 7:30. "Is everyone up already?"

"Everyone 'cept Raph and Jessica," he confirmed. 

I stood and walked to the window. He stared at me through the screen. "I suppose you want me to let you in," I assumed.

"Nah, actually I was kinda hoping you'd come out."

Closer now, I could see that he'd climbed the tree to get up here. He was perched on one of the branches. "Not a chance," I grinned. "I don't climb trees. My luck, I'd probably fall and break something."

He held out his hands to me. "I won't let you fall," he promised. "There's something I want to show you."

I considered that for a moment. "I think I'll use the door, thank you," I informed him.

He stared at me with those pleading, puppy dog eyes. "No, Rei, don't do that. They'll see you." He stood up on the limb. "Come on babe, just trust me."

I studied him for a moment before pushing the screen up and climbing onto the windowsill. "If I break my leg because of the little stunt, I'm never speaking to you again," I threatened, smiling.

He grinned back as he took my hand. "Oh, okay. I'll make sure you don't break anything worse than an ankle."

"Very funny."

Sneaking away from the house kind of reminded me of a spy movie. The fact that it was broad daylight didn't help hide us. But once we made it to the beach, we took off running, kicking sand up behind us. I was glad it was still early enough for the sand not to be scorching, because I had no shoes. In fact, I was running down the beach in pajamas bottoms and T-shirt, early morning, with a mutant turtle. God, I hoped no one was up watching the sunrise from their back porches.

I fell behind about a mile from the house. My side was screaming in pain and my legs felt like they were going to fall out from underneath me. Michaelangelo didn't look tired. I came to a stop. "Mikey, wait up!" I laughed.

He stopped and spun around, and a broad smile flashed across his face. In a second's time, he was beside me again. He swept me off my feet before I could think to protest. I latched onto his neck, somewhat surprise.

"You've been working out," I observed.

He shrugged nonchalantly, but his eyes danced with pride. "I started running again; I told you that." I nodded, and he suddenly frowned. "Not that it's anything to brag about with how little I can actually _do_."

I draped my arms over his shoulders and kissed him full on the lips, making a loud smacking sound. "Mmm, I love you baby," I assured him. "Even if you are slow and fat and lazy, I still love you."

He dropped me without warning and I cried out as I gripped his shoulders. My feet found the warm sand and I steadied myself. "Hey, who's the one who's out of breath?" he grinned back.

I put both palms on his plastron and pushed him back. He stumbled as I turned and took off again. I was close to the water's edge now and the white-capped waves were breaking around my feet, soaking the bottom of my pants. I didn't get very far before I heard him splashing behind me. A few steps later, his arms circled my waist from behind. I shrieked as I was whirled through the air in a circle. That would have been funny enough, but the fact that he lost his balance and sent both of us tumbling, head over heels into an oncoming wave, was hilarious. I washed up on the shore, gasping, coughing, and laughing at the same time.

As he came up next to me, he turned me quickly onto my back. I felt his hands on my sides, under my shirt. His lips closed over mine hungrily. Instantly, my mind was consumed by the thought of him, and I forgot everything else. "Touch me," he rasped, hands roaming over my body.

He was already exposed. I brushed my fingers over his long shaft without hesitation. He hardened under my touch. I could feel his lips on my neck as he raised my shirt. I was lost in sensations, totally oblivious to the fact that the sun was shining in my eyes. It was broad daylight. But we were beyond the houses here, and I doubted anyone would see us. At least I _hoped _no one would.

The shirt rose over my head and his hands came to rest on my breasts, touching and exploring as he kissed and nipped at my neck. I smiled. On second thought, I didn't give a damn if we were seen. I slipped my fingers underneath his elbow pads and tugged them down his arms. "You know," he mumbled into my mouth, breaking our kiss just long enough to get the words out. I pulled away to let him speak, but he followed me. "You don't really have to..." Again he got distracted. It took him a few seconds to finish his sentence. "..take those off. Not like they're gonna..." I squeezed his hard member gently and he gasped. "...get in the way," he finally finished in a moan.

He bit my bottom lip gently. "I know baby," I laughed, realizing now how hard it was to talk and kiss him at the same time. "But it's the principle of the thing." I ran my hands down his sides, feeling along the soft, hidden skin. "Being totally naked with you. I like that."

He laughed, kissing down my neck to my breasts. "Yeah," he mumbled.

The sound of the waves breaking around us nearly drowned him out. We were both already soaked so it made no difference, really, that we were lying in the surf. His lips and hands moved down and eased the pajama bottoms off my hips. I whispered his name and ran my fingers along his cool, damp skin as he trailed down my body, kissing and licking. He ran his tongue up the inside of my thigh and once over the thin lace panties, teasing me. I arched toward him. "Mikey..."

Another wave washed around us. He teased mercilessly through the black lace, holding my hips as he kissed and licked. Then he came back up to face me. "You know," he mumbled. "This is fun and all..." He kissed me hard and I wrapped my arms around his neck. "But I don't know how much longer I can wait."

"Mmm... yeah," I agreed.

He sucked hard on the side of my neck, his hands moving over me in a quickened, desperate pace. "I want to be inside of you." I moaned slightly and tilted my head away. "I've never wanted anything like I want you..."

I closed my eyes and breathed deep as he eased the last bit of clothing off my body. Suddenly, my eyes flew open. I wasn't sure exactly why, whether it had been a change in sound or smell or maybe sight as he stepped up and blocked the sun. He'd appeared so quickly, it was as if he'd come out of thin air. I gasped. "Omigod, Yukio!"


	13. Chapter Thirteen

****

CHAPTER 13

REI:

I stared at him in horror. "{Get up,}" he ordered.

Michaelangelo drew my shirt over my chest as he rose slowly between me and my brother. I slipped it over my head as quickly as I could, ignoring the sand that flew everywhere. "{Back off,}" Michaelangelo warned as he stood to his feet. "{Just leave her alone.}"

He'd barely managed to get his balance when Yukio shoved him aside. I gasped as his hand lashed out at me. I hid my face instinctively, and he grabbed my hair, jerking my head up. "{Just _what _do you think you're _doing_?}" he screamed at me. I felt tears sting my eyes from the pain and grabbed his wrist with both hands.

Mike was back on his feet and approaching quickly. Yukio saw him and turned to swing at him. Mike caught the blow on his forearm, blocking his face. "{I'm warning you, Yukio,}" he threatened. "{If you hurt her, you _will _regret it.}"

Yukio glared at him, fire in his eyes. "{I will _kill _you,}" he snarled. 

I gasped, terrified. In a flash, I'd pulled my pajama pants around my waist. "_Iie!_" I cried, grabbing Yukio's arm. "Yukio, _iie_!"

He pushed me back and I fell into the sand. There was no doubt in my mind that my brother was serious, and that scared me. I hadn't seen Michaelangelo fight, but he _said _he'd forgotten everything. I only hoped he would remember enough to keep him safe until I could get help.

I scrambled to my feet, running before I was even standing, and took off down the beach.

****

RAPHAEL:

"Have I told you how much we appreciate this, Jess?"

She turned to look at me through the dark sunglasses and smiled. "No. But I don't expect gratitude from you."

I grinned back and lay down on my side next to her, burying my fingers in the warm sand. "I still can't believe your parents own this. What the hell are you doin' in New York?"

"Well, I went there to go to school," she explained. I ran my hand over the front of her body, tracing the edges of the bikini top. "And then I... will you _stop _that?" she finished in a laugh. 

I smiled and pulled my hand back. "Sorry," I lied. "Go on."

"And then John and I were going to get married," she continued. I raked my eyes over her, drinking in every detail. She was normally never this exposed in public, and that kind of excited me. I guess being on a private beach loosened her up. "And shortly after we broke up I ran into you in the..." She paused. "You know, it's really hard to talk to you when you're undressing me with your eyes."

I grinned. 

"Raphael!" I turned to face the other direction and shielded my eyes from the sun. I saw Rei running toward us. "Raphael! I...!"

I sat up. Something was wrong. I was aware of that immediately. "What're you doin'?" I asked, shielding my eyes from the sun. "I thought you were still in bed, how'd you get out here?"

She collapsed onto her hands and knees, her whole body heaving as she gasped air. Jess and I exchanged glances and I stood up. "What's the matter?" I questioned, kneeling down next to her. 

Her breathing was labored and she cringed, holding her side. "Mike!" she gasped.

I immediately tensed. "What about Mike?"

"Yukio! Back...!"

Fear flooded through me. "Where?" I demanded.

She sat up, coughing and clutching her stomach with one arm, the other pointing behind her. "Beach! A mile!"

I broke into an instantaneous run, kicking up sand behind me. "Stay with her!" I yelled back at Jess. I didn't hear or see a response.

It was the fastest mile I ever did in my entire life. I sprinted the entire way, the sand burning my feet, until I saw them. I heard them, too, and I immediately knew what had happened. "Hey!" I yelled. Yukio turned. "{What the hell is going on here?}"

Michaelangelo was on his hands and knees, dripping blood into the sand. Anger surged through my veins as I glared at Yukio. I reached for my weapons, but I didn't have them. I'd left them on the beach, back at the house. It didn't matter. I'd _still _kick his ass.

****

MICHAELANGELO:

I spit blood into the sand and drew my eyes up to the two of them. They were speaking in rapid Japanese, but I couldn't understand them over the ringing in my ears. For a moment, I considered just collapsing right here. Raph could handle himself. I knew he could. But I couldn't lay down. If I did, I wouldn't get back up. And it was a long way back to the house.

I sat up, coughing as I wiped blood from my chin. There was a cry, and Yukio and Raphael were locked in battle. For a moment, I watched them. But my eyes were tired, and I couldn't follow the speed of their movements. My wrist hurt, and I figured it was probably sprained. One thing I _did _remember from my training was how to move with my attacker to lessen injury. Had I _not _remembered that, it would probably be torn to shreds. Or broken. Once again, I wanted to collapse.

My stomach twisted in knots. I felt like I was going to be sick. I crawled to the water's edge and washed the blood from my hands, wiping it from my lips. They were fighting. I was realizing that I wasn't as close to death as I thought I was. The icy cold water helped to wake me up. I remembered Rei, and cringed. I hoped she was okay, back at the house and safe. And I hoped Raphael "accidently" killed Yukio. Wouldn't _that _be sad?

I heard the fighting stop, and turned. To my surprise, Raphael was on his back, staring up at his opponent in surprise. They said nothing. Yukio turned and glared at me, then took off running back toward the house. Raphael raised himself onto his elbows and reached for his communicator. "Leo?"

I assume Leonardo answered. "Yukio is coming back to the house. Keep him away from Rei. I'll deal with him when I get there."

I could faintly hear Leo's voice as he responded. "I'll explain later. Just trust me on this one, okay?"

He closed the device and pulled himself to his feet. "You alright?" he asked me. I could still see the fire in his eyes. 

I nodded. "What happened?" I stammered. "How did he...?"

"Come on," he interrupted, pulling me up. "We gotta get back before he gets to your girlfriend."

I hesitated. "Raph, I..."

"Don't," he interrupted, turning to face me. I fell silent. "Just don't talk. Let's go."

****

LEONARDO:

Raphael was home before Yukio was. And Michaelangelo was with him. "Jesus, Mike, what happened!"

He lowered his head and literally _ran _up the stairs. "I'm fine!"

"Where's Splinter?" Raphael demanded.

I stared at him, gaping. "He... He went for a walk," I stammered. "What the hell happened?"

He growled and turned away. "What about Yukio?"

"Explain," I ordered sternly. "And keep it simple."

He spun to face me. "Mike was screwing Rei on the beach and Yukio beat the crap out of him," he answered. "That simple enough for you?"

I felt shock course through me. "What?"

"And moreover, I have a serious feeling that Yukio is involved with the foot clan." Again, I was surprised. I was still trying to get over the thought of Mike and Rei. "He just took me down and there's _two sensei_ that could've taught him that move. Take your pick, Leo. Splinter or Shredder."

I shook my head, trying to clear my thoughts. "Okay, maybe a little _less _simple," I stammered. "What happened?"

He shot me a look that warned of the sarcasm to come. "What, Leo, you want me to act it out for you? He was fucking Rei and Yukio saw them."

"How do you know that?" I demanded. I highly doubted Michaelangelo would tell him something like that, even if it _were _true. "Did you see them?"

"I didn't _have _to, Leo. Jesus, are you _blind_? They've been screwing like rabbits for the past two days. If you'd open your eyes and get your head out of the fucking astro plane, you would've seen that."

I opened my mouth to protest, but no sound came out. "And don't give me that crap about not making an accusation like that without proof. For one, it's not an accusation. There's nothing _wrong _with it so don't you even try to lecture me that there is. And for another thing, you give me one other reason why Yukio would be standing on a beach, screaming at my brother _and _yours about how he's just a goddamn freak of nature that needs to keep _its_ hands off Rei."

His voice echoed in pain and anger. The indignation was evident, and perhaps righteous. I looked away, trying to sort through the emotions he had stirred in me. I didn't have as much time as I would've hoped before Yukio walked into the room. The tension skyrocketed, as if it hadn't already been high enough. But he paid no attention to Raphael. Instead, he turned his anger toward me. 

"{You need to control your freak brother!}" he yelled, pointing at me. I was taken aback. "{And tell him to keep his goddamn hands off my sister before he ends up killing her!}"

"_Kissama!_" Raph yelled at him.

"Woah, woah, {just _wait _a minute,}" I tried to intervene, well aware of the fact that Raphael was already reaching for his weapons. I breathed deep, putting my own feelings on the matter aside. God, where was Splinter? "{I don't know what you're talking about, Yukio. But I can assure you that Michaelangelo would never put your sister in danger.}"

"{Oh, you don't know what I'm talking about, huh?}" he shot, advancing toward me. "{If he doesn't give my sister fucking salmonella she'll probably end up with a goddamn mutant _child_!}"

Donatello walked into the house, caught the last few words of that sentence, and turned around and walked right back out. In a way, I was relieved that he wasn't making this into an even _bigger _argument. But part of me _really _wanted Donny here. Mostly because I knew he would back me up, even if Raph wouldn't. Not that I had any stand to _make _right now. What I _really _wanted... was Splinter.

"{Yukio, just calm down,}" I advised.

"{I will _not _calm down until you get your goddamn brother under control. Put a fucking leash on him for Christ sake!}"

Instantly, my blood boiled. I almost didn't stop Raph when he lunged toward Yukio. It took a lot to tick me off. But Yukio was pushing _all _the right buttons.

I locked my arm around Raphael's and jerked him back forcefully. He spun to me. "What the _fuck _is your problem, Leo!" he yelled. "Are you not hearing this?"

"You," I pointed at him. "Shut up. _Anata_," I turned my attention to Yukio. "{Settle down. Mike and Rei are both adults and if they want to...}"

"{They are _not _adults,}" he interrupted, a very un-Japanese gesture. "{Rei is a child. She acts like a child, she _thinks _like a child. _Just _like your freak brother.}"

"{I hear you say 'freak' one more time and I'm gonna _fucking_ take your head off,}" Raphael threatened.

"{Just try it,}" Yukio shot back.

I felt like I could scream. "{_Will _you two _please_ shut up!}" I yelled. I glared at Raph, since it seemed that he was instigating most of this. "Raphael, I don't even have time to _deal _with what he's saying because I'm too damn busy trying to get _you _under control. Now _stop _it!"

"Well gee, Leo, why don't you just put a fucking leash on me?" he snapped.

I opened my mouth to reply, but realized I had absolutely nothing to say. "{I am taking my sister and we are leaving,}" Yukio informed.

I glared at him. "{Believe me, Yukio, after this incident, I would love to see you go. But frankly, you _have _no place to go.}"

"{I will find a place.}"

"{Will you all just _stop _it!}"

I spun and saw Rei standing in the doorway. I hadn't even heard her come in. "{I am _not _going _anywhere_!}" she yelled, tears streaming down her face. I wondered how much of the conversation she'd heard. "{I don't understand why everyone is so damn upset about something that is nobody's business but mine and Michaelangelo's!}"

She darted up the stairs, sobbing. "Rei!" Yukio called after her. "{Rei, get down here!}"

He started toward the steps, but Raph stepped in front of the opening, weapons crossed defensively in front of him. "Uh uh," he smiled. I knew that smile. It was a direct threat, and a preparation for a fight. I prayed he would control his own blood-lust. Even I couldn't hold him back when he got that look in his eye. I knew better than to try.

"{Step aside,}" Yukio threatened.

"{Uh, yeah, right,}" Raph answered sarcastically. "{Did you want me to do that before or after I end your pitiful life?}" They glared at each other. I didn't get involved. I knew it was pointless, and I wasn't totally sure I wanted to anyway. 

"{Back off, jackass,}" Raphael threatened. "{You know how much it'd break my heart if I had to kill you.}"

"{You cannot kill me,}" Yukio smirked.

Raphael's eyes blazed in anger. "{Look, asshole, I don't care who you are or where you learned whatever the hell it is you learned. I may be a mutant, but I'm still Hamato Yoshi's student. _First _generation. Trained by the man himself, in a manner of speaking, not his students.}" He flicked his wrists, twirling the sais. Yukio did not move. "{Wanna try me?}" Raph asked in a low growl. "{For real this time. Let's go. Fight to the death. You game?}"

For just an instant, Yukio's eyes flickered. Raphael was right, and we all knew it. And that realization produced the tiniest hint of fear somewhere deep inside of Yukio. It was not much; his intense gaze only wavered for a fraction of a second. But it was long enough to alert Raphael that he was dealing with someone he would surely rip in two in a real battle. 

"{Stand down,}" Raphael ordered. His voice commanded respect. 

I watched him, shocked and fascinated. I had never seen him act this way before. Sure, I had seen him mad. But it wasn't really anger he was displaying right now. Not _just _anger, anyway. For the first time in my life, I realized just how fierce his love for his brother was. He wasn't being angry; he was being protective. Weapons drawn and teeth bared, he stood ready to defend his best friend, to the death.

And Yukio stood down.

****

KEN'ICHI:

"{Is that the house?}" Kin asked.

I nodded slowly. "_Hai_."

"{It is a large house,}" he observed. "{Perhaps we had best wait until night and look around, so that we can know the floorplan before entering.}"

The two green figures sitting on the porch nearly had my undivided attention. I noted their weapons, and their mannerisms, and knew that they were an even greater threat to us than Yukio was. "{Who are they?}" Kin questioned.

"{The one on the right is called Raphael. The one on the left is Leonardo. They must leave before we can act.}"

"{There is still one of them inside, with the girl.}"

"{He is no threat. He has become _Shiro Ninja_.}" (AN: "_Shiro Ninja_" literally means "white ninja". It's a term used to describe a ninja who's lost his powers/abilities.)

I studied the house. "{If he makes an appearance, we will take him as well,}" I sighed. "{But I want no bloodshed.}"

"_Hai,_" the dark figure next to me agreed. "{There will be no need.}"


	14. Chapter Fourteen

****

CHAPTER 14

****

SPLINTER:

"_Sensei_, I need to talk to you." I looked up from the creek that ran through the lightly wooded yard. Raphael stepped forward. "I didn't wanna disturb you, but it's important."

He knelt beside me, head bowed respectfully. "What troubles you, Raphael?"

"Master, there's something about Yukio that you don't know."

I sighed. "Raphael, you can not allow your distaste for…"

"It's _not _about that!" he cried, looking up as he interrupted me. Then he realized it, and fell silent, cutting his gaze away.

"What troubles you so greatly, Raphael?" I questioned. "That you would continue to argue with your brothers on a subject that is of no importance."

He looked up again, a pleading look on his face. "But it _is _important. He's putting us all in danger. And I have to wonder who the threat really is. The guys who are after him, or _him_."

I stared for a few moments at the worried expression. "What reason do you have to consider Yukio himself to be a threat?"

He bowed his head. "_Sensei_," he started hesitantly, "he practices your exact technique." I felt my eyes widen slightly in surprise. Raphael looked up. "I fought with him," he mumbled. "When he was trying to _kill _Michaelaneglo. And he used a move to take me down that I've only seen executed by you and Leonardo. There ain't too many places he coulda learned that stuff from, Master. And you know he didn't learn it from you."

I considered that for a moment. "His father was my student, Raphael. He could have taught him my technique."

He shook his head. "Uh uh. You told us before that you only taught his father for a few years. He's too advanced. His moves are too complicated to be taught in a few years and retaught without influence sixteen years later." 

I considered that for a moment, and said nothing. Raphael stood to his feet. "I think your new ward's got connections to Shredder. And I thought you should know."

****

MICHAELANGELO:

I awoke to a scream, and was instantly out of bed. I threw the bedroom door open without thinking and sprinted down the stairs. There, I saw Rei bent back over the kitchen table, trying to stay away from two black figures. They were advancing slowly, heads down. I tensed, surprised. My first thought was that they were foot soldiers. But they weren't. They didn't have the familiar red bands that signified a connection to the foot clan.

One held _katanas _in his hands, the other had no weapon, but I saw _shurieken _between his fingers. She'd be dead if she made any attempt to move, and I had a feeling she knew it. I looked around. Where were my brothers? They weren't here. I knew that immediately. I cringed. What were the chances I could take them down? A lot less than the chances that they could kill me. My hands felt along my waist instinctively, but my weapons weren't there. Of course they weren't. I hadn't carried them for months.

A year ago, I wouldn't have needed them. We'd been trained to turn our surroundings themselves into weapons. Anything could be used offensively. But right now, my mind was drawing a complete blank. I tensed. I knew I had to do something. But if they were _half _as threatening as they looked, they already knew I was here. There was no chance I even had the element of surprise.

I reached for the nearest object and threw it in their direction. All I could do was hope I could stall them until... what? Until someone came to save me? That was pathetic. But it wasn't like I had much of a choice at this point.

They spun and in a flash, they were in front of me. I didn't even have a chance to gasp. Damn, how could anyone be that fast? Suddenly, a rag was over my face. I choked and gagged, trying to push him away without breathing. But he won. A sweet smell surrounded me, and I slipped away. 

***

I moaned slightly as the world slowly came into focus. I was tied tightly, sitting down. As I forced my eyes open, I saw darkness. A figure moved and I tried to envision it, but my eyes wouldn't focus. Exhausted by the effort, I closed them again. "You are awake," a voice called quietly. 

I jumped, startled by the closeness of the speaker. He was on my right, no more than a few feet away. I turned and stared into the blackness. "Who are you?" I whispered. My voice was raspy, and I wondered how long I'd been out.

"My name is Nikko Ken'ichi."

I moaned slightly as a jolt of pain shot through my head. I closed my eyes again. "Why did you kidnap me?"

"I seek only Yukio," he informed. 

I considered his words for a moment. "Why?" I finally managed. "What do you want with him?"

He was silent. For a minute, I thought he might have left the room. "Are you hungry?" he suddenly asked. He was on my other side now, and much further away. 

I pondered his movements for a minute, then his words. "No," I finally answered. I really wasn't.

"Are you sure? You haven't eaten in two days."

"Is that how long I've been here?" I demanded.

"Yes. The drug had a powerful effect on you, for some reason. It was not supposed to render you unconscious for such a long period of time."

I breathed deep. Drug. For a moment, it was silent. I closed my eyes again. The smell of food nearby made me open them. "I will untie you if you do not try to run."

I was too weak to run if I'd wanted to. Besides that, it was dark in here and I had no idea where I was anyway. I could be on the other side of the planet for all I knew. "Okay."

There was a quiet hiss, a sword being pulled from its sheath, and the ropes fell away. I brought my arms in front of me and rubbed my wrists. My whole body was sore. It hurt to move. He handed me a bowl and I took it hesitantly. The weight of it almost caused me to drop it all over my lap. "You are still weak," he reminded me. "Be careful."

It was some kind of soup. I recognized it, but didn't know what it was called. Splinter made it occasionally. I suddenly realized that I really _was _hungry. It also eased the burning in my throat. I drank it quickly, saying nothing. The figure in the room with me did not speak, either.

"Do you feel better?" he asked when I had finished.

"Yes," I mumbled back. My eyes had finally begun to adjust to the darkness. I could see the outline of the figure clearly now. But his face, and the rest of his body, was covered. It was a black _dogi_, mask, gloves, padded shoes. A red band around his upper arm had a symbol on it, but I could not see it in the darkness. He sat in a chair a few feet away, running a dark colored cloth over his _katana_. I tensed.

"You're ninja?" I questioned, although I was pretty sure I already knew the answer to that.

"Yes," he answered plainly.

"You speak English," I observed.

"Yes. My mother was an American. We spoke both languages in our household."

"So do we," I answered. It seemed odd to strike up a conversation with the guy who'd just drugged and kidnapped me, but I was interested to find out what he hoped to accomplish by keeping me here.

He seemed a little stunned by my response. "Where did you learn Japanese?"

I smiled. "I think the better question is where did we learn English. Our _sensei _came to the states from Japan. He taught us his language. We learned English from TV and radio."

Now I'd really confused him. I knew it, but he said nothing for a long time. "What are you, exactly?" he finally questioned.

I sighed. "Mutated turtles," I answered. "It's a long story."

"Well, we have a long time."

The invitation was obvious. I shifted nervously, but didn't answer. He didn't press for a response. "You spoke of a _sensei_," he finally spoke. "What does he teach?"

"He was formerly _shido-shin_ of the foot clan," I informed. He froze and looked up. I immediately noted the tension. "But that was before they turned... bad," I stammered.

He studied me for a moment. "How so?"

I swallowed hard. The tension in the room had skyrocketed with the mention of the foot. "One of his students turned on him," I explained hesitantly, "and assumed leadership of the clan. He corrupted it, while our _sensei _fled to the states."

After a moment of nervous silence, he looked back down at the blade in his hands. "You _sensei _is Hamato Yoshi, then?"

I don't know why I was surprised that he knew that. It seemed the entire country of Japan knew Splinter. "He... was, yes," I answered quietly, deciding to be honest. "He was mutated just like us."

"Into a turtle?"

"A rat," I corrected.

He paused for a moment, and looked up at me, as if he were trying to determine my truthfulness. I shrugged. "You don't have to believe me," I sighed. "I don't really expect you to."

"If Hamato Yoshi is your _sensei_, why do you not practice his form?"

I opened my mouth to reply, but I had no answer. That was a question that required years of explanation. But really, it had happened almost overnight. After April's death, I didn't feel like doing much of anything. I'd kept it up for a while. For a few days, I'd tried to escape reality the same ways Raph did. But I didn't like alcohol and I didn't know women, so that left the streets. 

But the pain was too much, and I couldn't control the anger. I killed more people in that one week than I had in my entire life, including a child. He was only thirteen, I found out later. He'd stolen a guitar from a pawn shop, and I killed him. I didn't mean to, but I did. Kneeling next to his lifeless body in that alley, I had a moment of sanity. And I realized that I was out of control, and dangerous. I went home, and hadn't picked up a set of nunchucks since.

I shuddered at the memory. "I used to," I finally answered him. "And my brothers still do."

"Your brothers are like you?" he checked.

"Yes," I answered. "And Splin... Yoshi taught us from when we were small."

"Why do you no longer practice his teaching?"

"I..." I started. "That's difficult to explain."

"It must upset him greatly."

I stared at him for a moment. I hadn't considered that before. "Yeah," I mumbled. "It probably does."

"And that doesn't concern you?"

Of _course _it concerned me. But I knew that it would upset him even more if he knew what I had done with his teaching. I closed my eyes and hung my head in shame at the memories. So much had gone wrong, so much had changed in so little time. And I found myself totally changed almost overnight. It was so wrong...

"I've changed a lot in the past few months," I mumbled, looking away. Why was I telling him this? This guy just kidnapped me. Why was I talking to him at all? My brothers were going to kill him when they found us.

"In truth, your testimony does not surprise me," he answered. "You have an air about you that is unmistakable as a ninja's. Yet you do not fight back."

I smiled slyly. "Maybe I was just waiting to see where you'd take me. Strategic infiltration."

He turned the sword slightly and looked at me. Words were unnecessary. The threat was perfectly evident. I shrugged inwardly. I had no intentions of attacking him. He could kick my ass, even if he _weren't _armed, and I knew it. He'd already done it once.

My mind drifted back to the attack in the living room, and suddenly, a thought struck me. "Where's Rei?" I demanded.

"She's here," he answered. "Sleeping. She's just fine."

"Sleeping or drugged?" I challenged.

"She's asleep." He nodded to a corner of the large room. "Over there. Go wake her if you want."

I squinted through the darkness and saw her faint outline, lying on a mattress on the floor. The ninja moved, and my eyes darted back to him. He sheathed his _katana _and reached for the bowl. "I will be back," he promised.

He disappeared quickly, almost as if he'd vanished into thin air. I looked around the room and stood, walking toward the wall. It felt like cinderblock, and cold. The only light came from a narrow window at the top of the room, about eight feet up. Outside, it was dark. Only moonlight came through. I grabbed the ledge of the window and pulled myself up, so I could look out. I saw a driveway, and another house. We were in a basement.

I dropped back down to the floor and walked across the room to where Rei was sleeping. I knelt next to her and brushed her hair out of her eyes. She moaned softly, and curled up into a ball. I noticed that she was shivering. It _was _kinda cold in here.

Careful not to wake her, I lay down behind her and slipped my arm around her waist. I could feel her tremble in my grasp, and she moaned again, like she was in pain. I sat up slightly, concerned. No, she wasn't in pain. She was dreaming. I brushed her hair back and kissed her cheek lightly. "Shh," I whispered, kissing along her jaw line. "It's okay."

She breathed deep, and I thought I heard her whisper my name faintly as she snuggled closer to me, and fell silent. I slipped my fingers underneath her shirt and caressed her skin gently as I rested my head in her hair. Our body heat mingled and I sighed. I wondered how long it would be before we got out of here.

****

RAPHAEL:

I slammed his back to the wall, holding him by his shoulders. "{I don't believe this bullshit about how you don't know anything,}" I growled. "{Who the hell is this guy and what does he want with you?}"

"{I have told you,}" he replied. "{I know nothing.}"

"{Raphael, just calm down,}" Leonardo advised. "{That's not going to get us anywhere.}"

Reluctantly, I let Yukio go. I knew Leo was right, but I hated it. I hated being so damn helpless. "{Is it safe, even, to assume that they came looking for Rei and Yukio?}" Donatello challenged. "{I mean, for all we know, Shredder could've set this up.}"

"{If Shredder knew how to get to the lair, he wouldn't have left it untouched,}" Leonardo answered.

"{And he wouldn't have waited until we all left to attack, either,}" I added coldly. "{He would've wanted us all there. That's just his style. He's stupid like that.}" I turned and glared at Yukio. "{They came for _him_,}" I pointed. "{And I think he knows exactly why.}"

Yukio straightened. "{I do not understand you, Raphael,}" he snapped. "{Regardless of _why _they were here, the fact of the matter is that they took my sister as well as your brother. And I want to find them just as much as you do!}"

"{Yukio is right,}" Splinter affirmed. "{We must first find Michaelangelo and Rei. Then we will know why they were taken captive.}"

I clenched my teeth. There was something very wrong about this, but I knew better than to say anything in Yukio's presence. I turned and left the room, ignoring a request that I stay. Jessica followed me.

"What did they say?" she asked quietly, closing the door to our borrowed room.

I growled in frustration, but said nothing. Sitting down on the bed, I buried my face in my hands. For a moment, it was still. Then I felt her move to the bed, and sit behind me on her knees. Her hands went to my shoulders and she massaged gently. "I'm sorry, Raphael," she whispered.

I didn't answer. She didn't try and force me, only kneaded harder at the tense muscles. I breathed deep a few times, trying to control the anger. "I'm worried, Jess," I mumbled.

"I know," she whispered.

"And that bastard isn't talking."

She was quiet for a moment. "Maybe he really doesn't know anything," she suggested quietly.

"No," I answered firmly. "Not when someone spends the time and effort to track him down, give him a warning, and follow us halfway across _our _country to kidnap his sister."

"What if it's not him at all?" she whispered. "What if it's Rei? She was the one they took, after all."

I remembered the note in the lair, and shook my head. "It's not Rei. It's Yukio. Or maybe his father, but he _knows _whatever it is."

She massaged at my neck and shoulders, saying nothing. I closed my eyes, trying to sort out my thoughts. I couldn't just sit here and hope Yukio would tell us something. If Mike was in danger, I had no right to sit here and do nothing. But at the same time, I knew there was nothing I could do.

****

REI:

I felt warm breath on the back of my neck as I opened my eyes slowly. A cinderblock wall was a few inches in front of me, and it took me a moment to remember where I was. I looked down, and saw an arm around my waist. If it hadn't been green, I probably would've panicked.

I rested my hand on his, pressing my back against him. He breathed deep and turned his wrist to intertwine his fingers with mine. "You awake?" he whispered quietly.

"Mmm hmm."

He squeezed my hand gently. "You're not hurt, are you?"

"No. Just a little scared." I pulled away from him and turned onto my back. He smiled slightly. "But I feel better now that you're awake."

He raised himself on one arm, the other one raising my shirt to just below my breasts. He began to trace little designs on my stomach. "He feed you?"

I nodded. "There's two of them. Only one of them speaks English. The other only speaks Japanese."

His arm slipped around my waist and he leaned down to kiss my neck. I tilted my chin up and smiled slightly. "How are we gonna get out of here?" I whispered.

He pulled away and sighed. "I've checked the door. It's bolted shut. A few months ago, I might've been able to break it down. But not now."

"What about the window?" I suggested, pointing up at the narrow opening toward the ceiling. Early morning sunlight was filtering through it, into the basement.

"I thought about that," he replied. "And it's a possibility. You could probably fit through there. But I think I wanna see what this guy wants, you know? I mean, usually when you kidnap someone, you don't usually feed them and leave them untied and unattended."

"Yeah," I agreed quietly.

"He wants something, but it's not us."

I reached up and traced the outline of his mask, my thoughts drifting. "I don't wanna be here, Mike," I whispered. "But you know, I don't really wanna go home, either."

The smile fell from his face and he sighed. "Yeah. I know."

I turned and pressed against him. "Do you believe… what my brother said? Any of it?"

"No," he answered immediately.

I buried my face in his neck. "I don't either," I agreed. "I love you."

He smiled and nuzzled against me. "I love you too, Rei-chan."

"You'd better," I whispered back. "My brother wants to _disown _me over your ass."

"Mmm," he acknowledged. "But you love my ass."

"Among other things," I grinned.

I didn't hear a _thing _until he spoke, and almost gave me a heart attack. "{Breakfast?}"

Michaelangelo sat up so fast, he nearly hit me in the face. He spun around toward the voice, dropping his feet to the floor. I looked up and saw Danno Kin standing a few feet away. He held a tray of food in his hands. "{Don't _do _that!}" I cried.

He smiled faintly. "{I thought you might like some food.}"

Of my two captors, I liked Kin more. Perhaps only because he allowed me to see his face. That at least gave the impression that I was talking to a real person. He was young, maybe twenty, with dark, sad eyes and ruffled hair. He wore the same _dogi _as his masked partner, Ken'ichi, but did not cover his face. I felt more comfortable with him. But Michaelangelo was comfortable with no one.

"{Where are we?}" he demanded. "{And who are you?}"

Kin bowed and gave his name. "{You are not in danger,}" he assured. "{We have no quarrel with you.}"

"{Yeah, I've heard _that_ before,}" Mike shot back. "{What is it you _do _want?}"

"{I want Yukio's blood,}" a voice behind him answered. Kin stepped aside and Ken'ichi advanced slowly. "{I have no quarrel with you.}"

His words struck me, and sent a cold shiver down my spine. "{Then why are you keeping us here?}" Mike snapped. "{And what's your problem with Yukio?}"

Ken'ichi's eyes darted to me. "{I had hoped he would come looking for his sister. That is the only reason why you are here.}"

"{Why did you take me?}" Michaelangelo pressed.

"{I believe you know where I can find him if he does not come.}"

Mike groaned, frustrated. "{Look, you found the lair and we ran away. Then you found where we went. What the hell do you want me to tell you? I don't _know _where he is. And if I did, I wouldn't tell you!}"

"{Your brothers might,}" Kin replied.

"{And if they don't?}" Mike challenged.

Ken'ichi and Kin exchanged glances. "{Then we will find him ourselves,}" Kin answered. "{As we have said, we have no quarrel with you.}"

"{Well, I know three mutant turtles that are going to have a _big _quarrel with you when they find out you kidnapped us.}"

He sighed. "{I don't wish to fight your brothers. I want only Yukio.}"

I stared at him, a feeling of dread sweeping over me. "{Why?}" I demanded. "{What has Yukio done?}"

The two ninjas exchanged glances. "{He murdered our _sensei_,}" Kin finally whispered. I gasped, shocked.

"{And his entire family,}" Ken'ichi added, his voice ringing in bitter anger. "In cold blood."

I could not speak. How could they say such a thing? Yukio would never do that! Moreover, how _could _he kill a master of the martial arts? Yukio was good, but he was not _that _good.

"{What?}" Michaelangelo answered for me. "{Why?}"

"{We are of opposing clans,}" Kin explained. "{Do you know the difference between a black and a red ninja?}"

Michaelangelo nodded. I did not, and I was glad that he went on to explain. "{They're opposing forces,}" Mike mumbled. "{_Aka-i-ninjutsu _is considered the good side, _Kan-aka-na-ninjutsu _relies heavily on magic.}"

Kin considered that. "{Not all black ninjas practice magic. There are many dark forms of _ninjutsu_.}"

"{Yeah, what's your point?}"

"{There are only five remaining _ninjutsu ryus_ in Japan,}" Kin went on. "{Three of them are considered red clans, the other two, including the foot, are black. I am of a _Aka-i-ninjutsu_ clan. Yukio is of the foot.}"

I felt my eyes widen as I finally realized what he was saying. "{No way!}" I cried. "{I do not believe this!}"

Mike glanced at me, then back at the two ninjas. "{If Yukio's part of the foot, why isn't the lair crawling with Shredder's goons?}" he demanded.

They both seemed confused by that. I was, as well. "{Who is Shredder?}" Ken'ichi asked.

For a moment, Michaelangelo seemed dumbstruck. Then he sighed. "{When Oroku Saki came to the states, he took on the name and persona of the Shredder,}" he explained. I had heard of Saki from my father, but I had never known that he was still alive. "{We still run into him from time to time, when he's around. And we're _always _dealing with the foot clan.}" Mike paused, and cut his gaze to the ground. "{Well, my brothers are.}"

Ken'ichi sighed. "{Yukio does not know Saki,}" he informed. "{Nor do we. Yukio was trained by the _sensei_ Saki left in command back in Japan.}" I could say nothing. I was not entirely sure I believed this account. "{We, too, deal with the foot, though they do not exhibit such a high profile as they once did under Saki's control. They are the primary source of ninja assassins in our country. The best trained, and most successful.}"

I stared at them. "{You're trying to tell me that my brother is an assassin?}"

Kin's eyes met mine. "{We know nothing of his standing in the clan. He could have been a member for only a few years.}"

"{A few years?}" I repeated in disbelief. "{That's not possible. We would have known.}"

"{Only _you_ did not,}" Kin explained. "{Your father...}"

"{My father _never _would have approved of such a thing!}"

I felt Michaelangelo's hand on my shoulder, trying to calm me. I was seething with anger at their accusations. "{He perhaps did not understand what his son's involvement in such a clan entailed.}"

"{He knew as well as you did that Yukio had taken an interest in the martial arts,}" Ken'ichi continued.

"{But knew nothing more until Yukio explained that he was in danger.}"

"{I do not believe you!}" I yelled. "{You killed my father and now you seek to kill my brother!}"

I tried to stand, but Michaelangelo grabbed me around the waist and pulled me back, onto his lap. "Woah, Rei, easy," he whispered into my hair. "Let's not piss these guys off, huh?"

"Let _go _of me," I growled.

"Just relax," he whispered. "Please."

I had no choice. He was holding me still.

"{We did not kill your father, Rei-san,}" Kin informed quietly. 

I looked up. "{He is alive?}"

The two dark figures exchanged glances. "{He took his own life,}" Ken'ichi told me. "{In an attempt to spare his dignity. But we did not threaten him any more than we have threatened you.}"

Mike's grip on me loosened. I felt as if the air had been stolen from my lungs. He had committed suicide. My eyes filled with tears as I gasped air, and I turned my face into Michaelangelo's neck. 

****

MICHAELANGELO:

I gave Rei a lingering look, then turned my eyes to the ninjas. "{Did you speak with him?}" I demanded. "{Before he died?}"

Kin shook his head. "{You must understand, Michaelangelo-san. The entire string of events took less than twenty-four hours.}"

"{What events?}" I questioned calmly. "{What exactly happened?}"

Ken'ichi sighed and took the sword off of his back as he sat down on the floor. He placed it in his lap, perhaps in a warning. It didn't matter. I wasn't about to try anything. "{Our _sensei _was killed when he returned home, late at night,}" he sighed. "{We don't know the exact circumstances of his death. We do know that his entire family, his wife and two young children, were slaughtered mercilessly.}"

"{Throwing stars left at the home bore the symbol of the foot clan,}" Kin continued.

"{So you know it was the foot,}" I assumed. "{But why? And how do you know it was Yukio?}"

"{We had recently intervened in a job Yukio was assigned to carry out,}" Kin explained. "{That was our first clue.}"

Rei tensed, and I held her tightly, silently begging her to keep quiet. I wasn't totally sure I believed this, either. But I wasn't any more sure that I _didn't _believe it. 

"{And Yukio was a friend of the family. He could have easily gained access.}"

"{Entrance isn't a problem for a ninja,}" I shot at him. He knew that. Why was he playing dumb with me? "{And how do you know it was Yukio you stopped? Did he tell you his name?}"

"{We saw his face.}"

"{And Yukio was once a student of _our _clan.}"

I was silenced. "{Our _sensei_ was killed at close range,}" Ken'ichi informed. "{At the kitchen table. The killer sat across from him.}"

"{He would not have allowed a threat to _get _so close to him,}" Kin continued. "{If he had _known _it was a threat.}"

"{But with no proof, we did not want to act irrationally.}"

"{So we went to his house, posing no threat.}"

"{We found his father dead by his own hand. And a check of his computer revealed that he had bought two plane tickets to New York.}"

I shook my head. "{That doesn't make any sense,}" I answered. "{Why wouldn't he just come to America with his kids? Why kill himself?}"

Ken'ichi bowed his head. "{We do not know. Perhaps he did not wish to burden your _sensei_.}"

I considered that for a moment. Just how much did these guys know? "{When he arranged for his son's escape, he must have assumed that he would be killed,}" Kin continued. "{_Falsely_ assumed.}"

I closed my eyes and breathed deep. Rei sobbed quietly against my neck. "I do not believe this," she moaned quietly, reverting to English. "They're lying."

"We have no reason to lie, Rei-san," Ken'ichi answered. "We seek to avenge our _sensei_, and you will never hear from us again."

She jerked away from me so fast, I had no chance to stop her. "Oh is that all!" she screamed. "You mean you just want to kill my brother? And here I thought it was something serious!"

Ken'ichi grabbed her wrists easily as she swung at him, but made no attempt to hurt her. I stood. "Rei, please," I started.

She jerked her wrists out of Ken'ichi's grasp and spun to face me. He let her go. "Please what?" she yelled. "I can't believe you! This is Yukio they're talking about! How dare you...!"

"Please try to calm _down_,"I answered her, taking her hands. "I know this is a lot but..."

"I can't believe you!" she screamed writhing away from me. "I hate you! How could you do this to me!"

She spun and ran toward the stairs. We watched her go, the two ninjas doing nothing to stop her. Ken'ichi sighed as he turned back to me. "{I understand this is probably difficult for _both _of you,}" he sympathized. "{But I only ask that you consider it. We have no quarrel with you, Michaelangelo-san. And we don't wish any harm to come to you. We only seek Yukio, and not a fight with your clan.}"

I shook my head. "{Whether or not what you say is true, my 'clan' isn't going to let you kill someone they've been asked to protect.}"

Kin bowed his head. Ken'ichi nodded slightly. "{I understand,}" he mumbled. 

Over his shoulder, I saw Rei come back down the stairs and move to a far corner of the room. She slouched down, bringing her knees to her chin, and hid her face. Our captors exchanged glances, and walked away, leaving the tray of food on the floor.

I glanced at it, then at Rei, and lay down on the mattress again. I wasn't hungry, but I picked at the food anyway. Finally, still not entirely sure what I was going to say, I walked to the corner. "Rei?"

"Leave me alone," she answered quietly.

I knelt beside her. "I'm sorry," I mumbled, brushing her hair behind her ear. She said nothing. I forced a smile. "You don't really hate me, do you?"

She looked up. "You don't really believe them, do you?" she shot back.

I sighed and pulled my hand back into my lap. "I don't know, angel," I whispered. "But I know that I'm gonna love you regardless."

She studied me for a moment, then threw her arms around my neck. "Oh, Mikey, I'm scared," she gasped.

I wrapped my arms around her. "It's okay," I assured her, nuzzling my face into her hair. "It'll be okay."

"No," she sobbed. "It's not okay. What if they're right, Michaelangelo? What if they're telling the truth?"

I closed my eyes. "I don't know, baby," I answered, brushing the back of her neck lightly. "I don't know. But listen to me..." I pulled away from her and placed my hands on either side of her face, drawing her eyes to mine. "I love you. Okay? I really do. No matter what."

She was still for a moment, then she forced a smile. "I know you do, Mikey," she whispered, brushing her fingers over the side of my face. "I know."

I brought her close and we kissed, long and slow.


	15. Chapter Fifteen

****

CHAPTER 15

****

MICHAELANGELO:

I awoke to the sound of the door being opened, and immediately sat up. I hadn't meant to fall asleep. Rei moaned slightly and turned on her back on the cool tile floor. "Mikey?"

"Shh," I whispered. "S'okay."

She opened her eyes just as Kin appeared at the bottom of the stairs. I hadn't heard the door close behind him. He walked to the other side of the room and looked down at the tray of untouched food as he picked it up. "{You did not eat,}" he observed.

"{Being kidnapped and held in a basement kind of takes away my appetite,}" I shot back at him.

He considered that for a moment, then turned to the stairs. "{Come with me,}" he ordered.

Rei and I exchanged glances as he started up the steps. I stood slowly, hesitating, and pulled her to her feet. She gripped my hand tightly. "What is he doing?" she whispered, her voice streaked with fear. "Where is he taking us?"

"He's not _taking_ us anywhere," I realized. "He's _asking _us to follow him to an unguarded area."

"Either that or he doesn't want to get blood all over his floor," she replied.

I shook my head. "I he was gonna do something like that, he'd tie us."

The bright sunlight made me cringe. I glanced around the kitchen as he set the tray next to the sink and walked through the living room. "{Come,}" he urged. "{It is okay. You are in no danger; you have my word.}"

We followed him to the front door where he stepped out onto the porch, holding the door for us. I studied him suspiciously. "{Return to your clan,}" he instructed. "{Tell them what we have told you. And choose your side.}"

I stared at him in disbelief. "{I've already told you what they'll do,}" I reminded him.

"{If you will confront Yukio with what I have told you, you will know that I speak the truth.}"

"{Why risk it?}" I demanded. "{Why let us go, when we know where you're staying?}"

He shook his head. "{That does not matter. And I allow you to leave so that you will tell them what I have told you.}"

"{Why let _me _go?}" Rei asked quietly.

Kin smiled and raised a hand to her cheek. She tensed noticeably. "{We wish you no harm, Rei-san. What would we accomplish by keeping you here? He is obviously not coming for you.}"

"{He hasn't had a chance yet,}" I defended.

"{He has,}" Kin sighed, dropping his hand as he turned to me. "{We left the exact address for him. And even if we had not. Do you expect that _four_ well-trained ninjas could not follow a trail much more obvious than the one that _we _followed from halfway across the world?}"

I had no answer to that. He sighed. "{Go in peace, Michaelangelo-san. And I hope that you return the same.}"

He bowed, and I returned the gesture, more out of habit than sincerity. "{How will we find you?}" I asked as he turned away. "{If we need to, I mean.}"

He stopped and looked back toward us. "{You will not need to,}" he assured us. "{We will find you. You have three days.}"

****

LEONARDO:

"We can't just sit here and do nothing," I informed quietly. "We've waited too long as it is. It's obvious that they're not making any demands, and if Yukio truly knows nothing then we have nowhere to look."

"It's a goddamn wild goose chase," Raphael mumbled under his breath.

I wanted to protest, but I had nothing to say. Raph looked up, and our eyes met. "Ask him who Saigo is," he demanded.

I stared at him for a moment. "Who is that?"

"The name on the letter that was left for us. The name next to his. Ask him who it is."

"What good will that do, Raph?" Donatello asked. "If you're so convinced that he's lying, why wouldn't he lie about that, too?"

"Yeah, he'll lie," Raph mumbled. "But he's not good enough to act unaffected by it."

"Raphael, regardless of what, if anything, Yukio has to do with all this, we have to..."

Michaelangelo walked through the front door. 

I sprang to my feet in a fraction of a second. "Mike! Where the hell have you been!"

"I..." he started. "I'm fine."

Rei stumbled in after him. She'd been crying. "Are you alright?" Raph asked, rushing to them. Rei hid behind Mike, and said nothing.

"Yeah, we're fine," Michaelangelo answered, casting his eyes down.

"What happened?"

Mike shifted nervously. "I... don't really want to talk right now. Just give me a few minutes, okay?"

We all stared at him in shock. Master Splinter came out of his room. "Michaelangelo," he greeted, sounding as surprised as I felt. "What happened?"

"It's..." he stammered. "It's a long story." Splinter waited. Mike shifted nervously. "I need some time to... gather my thoughts, okay?" he mumbled. "There's no danger. Just give me a little time."

Rei raced up the stairs ahead of him, not wanting to be left alone with us. He kept his head down as he walked away, and left the four of us staring at each other in bewilderment.

****

RAPHAEL:

I felt him approach long before he said anything, but I didn't turn around until he spoke. "Hey, Raph?"

I glanced at him. A tired expression was on his face, but he didn't look like he'd been crying. "What're you doing up?" I asked. "It's almost three in the morning."

He smiled faintly. "I was gonna ask you the same thing."

I looked back out at the water. "Just thinking," I mumbled. "Not much else to do around here. And I can't sleep."

"Yeah," he whispered. "I know."

I glanced at him. "Mikey, what happened?" I asked, not really expecting an answer, but hoping for one.

"How much do you know?" he asked.

I shrugged. "Kind of the same MO as at the lair. There was a letter in the table. Your name, Rei's, and the other name that was on Yukio's letter too."

"What name?"

"Saigo," I answered.

He stared down at the sand. "It was their _sensei_," he whispered.

I stared at him. "Whose?" I asked. "What do you mean?"

He was quiet for a long time, staring out over the lake. I waited for him to continue, hoping he would. "They'll be back in three days."

I glanced at him. "How do you know?"

"Because they told me," he whispered, staring down at the sand.

I studied him carefully. "You guys didn't escape, did you," I realized. I wasn't really asking. I already knew. "They let you go." He nodded. "Why?"

"So that... we could tell everyone why they want him."

I considered his words carefully. "Their father?" I questioned. "Why do we need to know that?" He didn't answer. "Or is it Yukio?"

He looked up. "I don't think anybody's gonna believe me," he mumbled. "Especially since... after the other day, I'd... have reason to want to lie about this."

"About what?" I asked.

"But I think if anyone's gonna believe me, it'd be you."

"Believe what?" I pressed.

He shifted nervously. "Can we... walk? I don't want to take a chance of him hearing us."

I studied him suspiciously. "Mike, it's three o'clock in the morning. And if he _did _come out here, one, I'd know it, and two, he doesn't understand English."

His eyes met mine. "Please?"

I looked down the beach, and realized I had no problem with it. I started walking slowly. He followed silently at my side. "What'd they tell you, Mike?"

He swallowed hard. "They said... it was never their dad they were after. But he's dead because he committed suicide after sending Yukio and Rei to the US."

I took that with little emotion. I didn't want to interrupt him by asking questions. "They want Yukio. It has nothing to do with his father. They want him because he killed their _sensei_. They're part of another clan and they stopped him from doing something and he came back and killed their _sensei _and his whole family."

Somehow, I was not as surprised as I felt I should be. "You saying that Yukio's a _ninja_?"

"He's... They said he's part of the foot clan."

I sighed deeply. Shit, we were harboring the enemy! But at the same time that I dreaded the thought, there was a sense of relief. I _knew _I wasn't crazy. I _knew _his form was familiar. "Why hasn't he contacted Shredder?" I asked. It was the one question that had stopped me cold.

"When Shredder came to the US, he left another _sensei _in charge of the foot. One of _his _students. Yukio doesn't even know Saki's still alive. And frankly, I'd rather not tell him."

I thought about that for a minute. "So Yukio is three steps away from Splinter," I mused.

"What do you mean?" Mike questioned.

"Splinter taught Shredder. Shredder taught another guy who taught Yukio."

He sighed. "Does it really matter, Raph?"

"Well, it's gonna matter when you're trying to prove this."

He shook his head slightly. "Raphael, I'm not sure I _want _to prove this." He looked up at me. "Rei is..."

He didn't finish. He didn't need to. I saw the problem. I sighed. "Mike, if what they're saying is true, we have no right to protect him," I informed.

"Rei doesn't believe it's true."

"That doesn't change anything."

"Raph, they're gonna kill him."

I stared at him. "Are you hearing your own words, Mike?" I questioned. "He killed an entire family? And he belongs to the foot clan? Shit, Mikey, these guys are on _our _side!"

"How do we know it's true?"

"How do we know it's _not_?"

"We're supposed to protect him. It was his father's last request, remember?"

I closed my eyes and tried to think. "You gonna tell this to Splinter?"

"You think I should?"

"I dunno yet."

"Neither do I."

I considered keeping it from him. I considered what might happen if we were to "accidently" fail in keeping Yukio safe. I realized that Splinter would know _exactly _what happened. We couldn't lie about that. He'd know. Four of us... well, three... wouldn't fail against two opponents. If we could keep Leo and Don away... _I _could fail. No, Splinter would know. There wasn't a doubt in my mind. I was a good liar, but it would be too much of a coincidence. "We have to tell him," I concluded.

"He won't believe me."

I sighed. "No, he will. He'll believe that they told you all that. But I don't know if he'll believe _them_."

****

SPLINTER:

I listened to the account calmly. When he had finished, Michaelangelo looked down at the floor. "We have three days. Well, two now. They said they'd come back."

I closed my eyes and breathed deep. It was almost too much to believe. I knew that Tang Shiro would not have approved of his son's involvement in the foot clan. But the story made certain pieces of the puzzle fall into place. I looked up and caught Leonardo's stare. "Bring Rei to me," I ordered quietly.

Michaelangelo sprang to his feet. "No!" he cried. "Please. Leave her out of this."

Raphael placed a reassuring hand on his brother's shoulder, and Leonardo left. Michaelangelo's eyes fell. "So their whole thing is that they want to avenge their _sensei_," Donatello mused.

"And his family," Michaelangelo whispered, eyes closed.

There was a moment of silence. I considered the words with great care. "Master?" I turned my gaze to Raphael. "Do you think they'd have any reason to lie?"

It was not a challenge. He was asking a sincere question. I sighed deeply as I realized the answer. For them to follow him to the United States, their anger was fierce. And if their motive was in any way unpure, they would not hesitate to lash out at anyone who stood in their path, including Michaelangelo and Rei. They were focused, but it was obvious that they valued life. This was not a quality taught by _Kan-aka-na-ninjutsu_, and it was obvious that they were ninjas. That being the case, it seemed we were on the same side.

"I have little doubt of their testimony," I answered quietly.

Rei and Leonardo stepped through the door. I exchanged glances with him, then with Raphael and Donatello individually, and they left. She knelt on the floor near Michaelangelo, and hung her head. "{You wanted to see me?}"

"{You heard the account of your captors?}" I questioned.

She nodded slightly.

"{Do you believe it?}"

She did not respond. Michaelangelo looked toward her, but she only studied the carpet. "{I do not know what I believe,}" she whispered after a long silence.

"{I would like you to look at something for me, Rei-chan,}" I sighed. "{And tell me if you recognize it. Can you do that for me?}"

"_Hai_," she whispered.

Her eyes raised slowly as I held out a black throwing star. "_Shurieken_," she whispered, identifying it. "{Is there something else I should see?}"

"{Do you recognize the symbol?}"

She took it from my hand, and stared at the writing. "{It is my brother's,}" she choked, quietly.

"{That symbol is on your brother's things?}"

She nodded slightly. "{On his weapons, yes. And on his uniform.}"

I sighed deeply, my suspicions confirmed. "{That throwing star was taken from the scene of a battle with the foot clan,}" I informed her. "{It bears Oroku Saki's symbol.}"

She stared at it for a moment, then at me. She began to cry.

****

MICHAELANGELO:

"{I made a promise to your father. That as long as you were in my care, you would be safe. And that is why I am asking you to leave now.}"

His eyes widened. Rei turned her face into my shoulder. I held her, running my hand lightly up and down her back. "{You condemn me to death!}"

Splinter shook his head. "{You have made your own decisions, Yukio. Now you must live with the consquences.}"

"{How could you possibly believe the words of those two assassins over my own?}" Yukio yelled. "{They kidnapped one of _your _students as well, remember?}"

Splinter nodded. "{Yes. I do remember. And they returned him unharmed.}"

"{They weren't after him. They were after _me_. For something my _father_ did!}"

Splinter sighed deeply. "{Yukio, it is not only their account that leads me to believe that you are a member of the foot clan.}"

"{I am _not_!}" he yelled.

"{Raise your shirt, Yukio.}"

I stared at him, a little shocked at the request. Yukio tensed noticeably, and didn't move. There was a long, tense silence. We all looked to Splinter for an explanation. "{You will not,}" he observed. "{Would you like to explain why?}"

Yukio was speechless. He opened his mouth to say something, but no sound came out. "{There is a tattoo, correct?}" Splinter informed. He smiled, a sad but knowing smile. "{Oruku Saki mandated it before leaving Japan.}"

"{How do you know this?}" Yukio growled.

"{You will first explain to me why you killed the...}"

"{I killed _no one_!}" he interrupted, a very un-Japanese thing to do. Especially when talking to someone of greater authority. He was panicking.

"{Tell me, Yukio, what does your involvement in the foot clan entail?}" Splinter demanded. "{Surely, you put your training to use. Will you lie to me and say that it is for good?}"

Yukio was again speechless. "{I will tell you nothing,}" he finally snapped.

"{Then leave,}" Splinter answered. "{And quickly, for your advesaries will be here momentarily.}"

"{And if I don't?}" Yukio challenged. "{You cannot let them kill me,}"

Splinter sighed. "{I cannot be held responsible if you act against my orders.}"

Yukio looked around the room, searching each of us. His eyes came to rest on me, and he glared in hate and fury. "{Fine then,}" he snarled, turning back to Splinter. "{I will take my sister and we will leave.}"

His words sent a jolt of electricity through my body. Rei tensed, pressing harder to me. She still hid her face. All eyes had turned to look at her. I pulled away, forcing her to look at them. She had to make a decision. Not that I didn't know full well what she _wanted _to do. But if she couldn't stand up to him, how could she expect me to support her?

She locked eyes with her brother, and I felt her shoulders rise and fall as she breathed deeply. "{I am not leaving with you,}" she managed after a long silence.

He stared at her, shocked. I smiled inwardly, but kept my face emotionless. "{What?}" he demanded.

She swallowed hard. "{I will not live the rest of my life running from _ninjas_ who wish to kill you for things that I don't want to believe you _did_.}"

Anger flared in his eyes, and he took a step forward. Instantly, Raphael appeared on the other side of Rei. Yukio stopped, and looked toward Splinter. Leonardo and Donatello stood on either side of him. At that point, he realized how outnumbered he was. And any thoughts of attack fled.

"{Leave, Yukio,}" Splinter ordered.

****

KEN'ICHI:

"{Do you think they will fight?}" Kin asked quietly as we studied the house. We had only been here for a few minutes, and I was not yet sure who was in the house.

"{I do not know,}" I answered. "{It is possible.}"

"{I doubt we can win against all of them.}"

I sighed. "_Hai_. {We must first talk with their leader, and see where they stand.}"

A feeling washed over me. The _haragei _training instilled in me sprang to life. "{Do you mean their _sensei_?}" Kin questioned. "{Or the...?}"

I held up my hand to silence him as I scanned the area. Someone was nearby. Dangerously close, in fact. But there was no sound, and no movement. "{Yukio is not here.}"

I spun around, instinctively reaching for the _katana_ on my back. A dark figure stood a few yards away. "{Who are you?}" I demanded, not recognizing the voice.

"{My name is Leonardo,}" he answered, stepping forward. I could sense his uneasiness. "{We don't wish to fight you.}"

I studied him for a minute, then slid the weapon back into its sheath. I bowed slightly. "_Watashi no namae wa Nikko Ken'ichi desu_," I greeted.

Leonardo stepped into the light. He looked much like his brother, nearly identical except that he was much more built. I could sense him inspecting me, and allowed it. I had nothing to hide. "{Yukio has left,}" he informed after a moment of silence. I saw movement behind him, and two of his brothers appeared. Michaelangelo was the only one missing. They stayed behind him, and said nothing. "{If you wish to find him, you will have to do it alone.}"

I studied him for a moment, trying to determine his honesty. His voice was emotionless, and hard to read. "{You have hidden him?}" I questioned.

Leonardo shook his head. "{We have asked him to leave, and he has complied. I trust that if you can follow him half way across the world, you will be able to find him now if you are persistant enough.}"

I considered that. We would find him, of course. "{His sister will remain with us,}" Leonardo continued. "{So tell me now if we can expect to see you again.}"

I shook my head. "{We have no quarrel with his sister. Nor with you.}"

"{Then leave,}" he answered quietly. "{And go in peace.}"

I studied him for a moment, and turned my attention to the setting sun. "{When did he leave?}"

"{We were charged with his safekeeping, Nikko-san,}" Leonardo answered. "{And we can tell you nothing. You followed him this far, now follow him again.}"

I smiled. They knew where their loyalty rested. I bowed slightly. "_Sayonara_, Leonardo-san."

He bowed, but did not take his eyes from me. We left, and did not speak again.

****

SPLINTER:

"_Sensei,_ can I speak with you?"

I looked up. "Come in, Michaelangelo."

The door opened slightly, and he stepped inside, closing the door behind him. A serious expression was on his face. "Is something wrong, my son?"

He paused, but said nothing. After a moment of silence, he took a step forward. I noted the tension as he swallowed hard. Still quiet, he dropped to his knees in front of me, hanging his head. The movement was deliberate, and I studied him carefully, not entirely sure what his purpose was. My question was soon answered as he bowed low, touching his forehead to the carpet at my feet. I watched him, surprised at the unexpected humility.

"I am sorry, father," he whispered. His voice was barely audible, even to me.

"For what do you apologize?" I asked, shocked.

He looked up, straightening slightly, and our eyes met. "For everything I've done, and everything I've become, in these past few months."

I found myself speechless. He bowed again. "I want you to teach me, _Sensei_," he continued. "I... I've forgotten everything. But I know you can..." He choked, as if he were beginning to cry. "I know you can teach me. You did it once and I know you can do it again."

For a moment, I studied him. There was no question that he was serious. "Rise, Michaelangelo," I commanded. He sat up. A single tear trickled down his cheek. I smiled as I reached toward him and brushed it aside. I could feel his urge to look away, but he kept his eyes trained on me. 

"Why do you ask me this?" I questioned. "Why do you want to again become that which you have been running from for so long?"

He shook his head slowly. "I can't run away from who I am. Even if I wanted to it..." He cut his gaze to the floor, hanging his head. "I'm tired of being afraid, _Sensei._ Of who I am. And I think... now that I've had some time to think... that I can be _me _and still not..." 

He ran out of words, and looked back up at me. His eyes told me everything I needed to know. By what means, I was not entirely sure, but he had come to terms with himself. He had forgiven his past mistakes, and he was ready now to begin again. I smiled at this realization and nodded slightly. "I will do as much as I am able," I promised, "to help you."

He wiped his eyes and smiled in return. "Thank you, Master."

He stood and walked to the door. When he opened it, he turned back to me. "Oh, there's one other thing, too."

"What is that?"

He glanced into the living room, and took a step back into my room, pulling Rei with him. He pulled her completely in front of him and rested his hands on her shoulders. "You can thank her," he grinned.

She blushed, and lowered her eyes, her hair falling around her face. I smiled. "I thought you should know," he informed. "Since I'm pretty sure everyone else does."

I understood what he was saying, and looked toward the girl. "Come here, child."

Michaelangelo nudged her forward and she nearly tripped. She turned and glared at him before approaching me. I gestured toward my son and he followed her. She bowed slightly as she stopped about a foot away from me. "Splinter-sama," she greeted quietly.

I reached for her hand, and Michaelangelo's as he approached, and joined them. They looked at each other. Rei seemed shocked. Michaelangelo only smiled. After a moment, they looked to me. I took my hands away from theirs. "You two have my blessing," I nodded. "Use it wisely."

For a moment, there was silence. Michaelangelo looked toward the girl he held hands with, and he smiled slyly. Without warning, and caring nothing for the fact that he was in my presence, he kissed her. She squealed in surprise as he nearly swept her off her feet. I could not help but laugh quietly.

Finally, she managed to pull away from him. "Mikey! I'm surprised at you!" she laughed. But I could tell from her tone that she was not.

He spun her to face the door and began to usher her out. "Just obeying orders," he grinned.

He shoved her out the door and into the living room, then turned back to face me. I was still laughing to myself, amused by his boldness. His smile fell, and for a brief moment his expression turned serious. But even so, his eyes sparkled. "Master Splinter?"

"Yes, Michaelangelo?"

"Thank you."

I smiled and nodded slightly, and he disappeared.


	16. Epilogue

****

EPILOGUE

****

REI:

I never saw my brother again. I'm not sure if they caught him, but I imagine they did. We returned to New York, convinced that there was no longer a threat. For a few weeks, things were painfully normal. Being back in the lair caused Michaelangelo to become quiet again. Even as he began his training again, I could sense that he was incredibly torn. He talked a great deal with Raphael, but the two of us spoke very little. Finally the silence became too much.

He left the lair without telling anyone where he was going. I followed him, as concerned as I was curious, and stood half-hidden by a tree, watching him as the bright afternoon sunlight casting shadows around his hidden figure. I approached slowly, and he turned. "What're you doing here?" he asked quietly. The words were accusative, but his tone was not.

"I followed you," I admitted.

He held out his hand to me and I let out a sigh of relief. "Now why does that not surprise me?" he whispered as he pulled me close.

I grinned back, and looked down at the simple grave marker. "April O'Neil," I read. "Is that her?"

He nodded. "Yes."

I knelt next to the stone and traced the dates. Five months ago today, she had taken her last breath. She had been only thirty years old. Michaelangelo kneeled beside me and placed a single white rose on the grass in front of the headstone. He left his hand there, on the ground, for a few moments. "I wish I could talk to her, you know?" he whispered. "Tell her I'm sorry."

I glanced up at him and placed a hand on his cheek. "I think she knows."

He closed his eyes and breathed deep. A single tear trickled down his cheek and burned where it met my skin. I did not try to comfort him. I allowed my hand to fall and looked back at the grave. For a long time, neither of us spoke. After a few minutes, he crossed his legs in front of him and pulled me to his side. I rested my head on his shoulder as he rubbed my arm through the dark T-shirt I wore.

"Know what?" he finally whispered.

"Hmm?"

"I'm glad she got her big story before she died."

I considered that for a minute. "What do you mean?"

"She was always looking for the story of the century," he smiled. "The one that would make everyone sit up and take notice. And when she found it, she jumped from being second-best reporter at Channel 6 to working a crime beat for the network. Practically overnight. It was what she'd always wanted." I was silent. It was obvious that he wasn't waiting for a response. 

"And her report really did change the way the city was run," he continued after a moment of quiet. "You know crime dropped 25% in a little over a month?"

I smiled. "She has quite a legacy."

He nodded. "Yeah, she does."

I snuggled closer to him and slipped my hand underneath the trenchcoat, circling his waist. I brushed my fingers over the soft skin I found there. I wasn't trying to get a response from him, but I did. He laughed as he took my hand away. "Let's wait until we get home, huh?" he grinned, pulling away. "I don't wanna have to explain that one to spectators."

I smiled. "We don't have to go," I assured him. "I wasn't trying to give you a hint or anything. I just like touching you."

He laughed. "Right," he mumbled. He turned and looked at me. "I'm sorry if I've been kind of distant," he whispered. "It's just... this is a lot to face, and it still hurts. I'm trying to put it behind me, but it's hard."

I smiled and touched his cheek. "I understand," I assured him.

"And in case I haven't said it, I'm sorry about your brother."

I nodded slightly, dropping my eyes. "He made his own choices," I whispered.

"So did I," he answered. "Doesn't make it any easier."

I let my hand fall back to my lap. His fingers came under my chin and turned my face to his. "I love you, Rei."

From the look in his eyes, I knew he meant it. I drew close to him and kissed his lips briefly. "I love you, too."

He stood to his feet and offered me a hand. "We don't have to go," I repeated as he pulled me up. "If you want to..."

He touched his finger to my lips, silencing me. I studied him carefully. "I'm ready to go," he whispered. The deep, serious tone of his voice alerted me that he was saying much more than I could know right now. I did not argue with him. Instead, I nodded. 

"Okay."

His arm circled my shoulders and we turned away. But he stopped and looked back. I paused as he pulled away from me and knelt again next to the gravestone. He kissed his fingers, and pressed them to the engraved name. For a moment, he held the position. Then he dropped his hand and ran it over the grass. "I love you, April."

****

There is a sequel to this book, if you didn't know that. ;) It is called "Where Are You?" and it is posted under the sn "Danger Incarnate" (It was co-written with her; she's my editor for my publishable books ie not fanfiction. lol) Hope you enjoyed!


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